Rapper Foxy Brown is being sent to jail today for violating her probation. People Magazine provided these details:
Last week, Brown surrendered to police on charges that she assaulted her Brooklyn neighbor with her BlackBerry device. Then, just one day after her surrender, police in Mahwah, N.J., pulled the rapper over after she was spotted talking on her cell phone while driving her 2007 Land Rover. Officers cited her for talking on the phone and failing to stop at a stop sign. In addition, Brown gave police officers a false birth date and a variation of her name. Forced to admit her real identity, police reportedly learned that the musician was driving with a suspended license. Her Land Rover’s registration also had been suspended.
In a Pulitzer-prize winning maneuver, People tried to give this cloud a silver lining:
Yet despite all of her legal troubles, Brown has made headlines of another sort: She apparently announced that she’s pregnant, the New York Post reports. According to the paper, the rapper was seen shopping at a New York City Bed, Bath & Beyond, where she said, “I’m getting married in September. I’m pregnant.”
I swear to God the mission statement for People has to read: “Give every story a fairy-tale ending or housewives will stop reading us.” They could report on global terrorism and the story would end with a princess kissing Osama Bin Laden in a cottage made of cupcakes. Of course, this probably isn’t the case, because housewives can’t read. But it’s fun to pretend, isn’t it?
cat | August 22, 2007 at 3:15 pm
FIRST
bah | August 22, 2007 at 3:15 pm
third!
Scooby Doo | August 22, 2007 at 3:17 pm
Foiled again!
Annie Rexia | August 22, 2007 at 3:20 pm
Oh christ. Here come the racial comments.
wedgeone | August 22, 2007 at 3:22 pm
I heard her hygeine is bad. I think her big fat ass might actually be her blackberry device.
Cowgirl fully loaded | August 22, 2007 at 3:23 pm
Fish is taking after Mike, trying to rile up us women folk with his insensitive ramblings. That’s a’right though cuz I’m rarely at home.
Malffy Hernandes | August 22, 2007 at 3:23 pm
Wow, and to think Lohan’s running free. I mean c’mon who hasn’t beaten someone over the head with a blackberry?
jrzmommy | August 22, 2007 at 3:24 pm
Violent assault, multiple driver violations, giving false info to a cop, unmarried and pregnant.
Why so worried about racial comments?
Oh.
MinoritiesAreTheDeathOfUs | August 22, 2007 at 3:25 pm
It seems that no matter how many and how often an “African-American” is in trouble it is always da white man behind they downfall. I say get rid of em all.
This country was built on European standards and now not only do we have these idiots, but now we have an invasion force of Mexicans to contend with. Go NWO!!!!!!!!!!!
jrzmommy | August 22, 2007 at 3:26 pm
This is where I stop reading…..I don’t think I can take 165 more posts of pseudo KKK garbage and the mini-Farakhans of the world duking it out over the honor/dishonor of Foxy Brown. Mmmm buh-bye.
Astute Eagle | August 22, 2007 at 3:28 pm
It seems like racial profiling to me. How many blonde bimbos run stop lights while talking on their phone and petting their toy dogs? I spotted at least 2 on my way to work! Can’t we all just get along? The man is keeping her down!
Bite Me! | August 22, 2007 at 3:28 pm
HAHAHAHAAAHA….. this was the funniest post in a while!! Love you Fish!! xoxo
Bite Me! is so gay | August 22, 2007 at 3:29 pm
what a homo man.
Becca | August 22, 2007 at 3:30 pm
who is foxy brown???????? in what way is she famous? is it for being on drugs, & just born stupid? oh wait, sorry, thats the whole lohan family…
Malffy Hernandes | August 22, 2007 at 3:31 pm
Hey, what’s with Americans hating Mexicans aren’t they like spanish speaking Canadians..i don’t know,lol.
veggi | August 22, 2007 at 3:31 pm
@14 – who’s the iohan family?
veggi | August 22, 2007 at 3:31 pm
@14 – who’s the iohan family?
veggi | August 22, 2007 at 3:32 pm
I don’t think this has to degenerate into a whole racial thing. The story is about People magazine, really – what’s up with celebs and their suckup mags shamelessly using motherhood as a shield against punishment for criminal behavior?
p.s. Why does is this story posted with a picture of animal testing of cosmetics? Doesn’t have anything to do with the story. And I’m against it!
Duchess of Dork | August 22, 2007 at 3:33 pm
I love how people complain about Mexicans, when in a few hundred years, the US will likely be 99% Hispanic.
Soak it in, guys. Soak it in. It’s easier to take a brisk walk than come over on a plane.
Lovely | August 22, 2007 at 3:38 pm
Foxy “Brown” and “Black”Berry… I’s too easy to be racist here… I’ll just let this one go-
Bite Me! | August 22, 2007 at 3:40 pm
@12 You so funny troll.
Eagle Chick | August 22, 2007 at 3:40 pm
I know what you guys mean about Mexicans. Expecially New Mexicans who try to stir the melting pot o’ trouble!
ssdd | August 22, 2007 at 3:45 pm
Is there really any need for a ‘comment’ here… I think the story alone just speaks volumns………… huge, volumns…. great big ole’ big volumns…… monstrous volum …… well anyways..
Binky | August 22, 2007 at 3:46 pm
I only ‘Foxy Brown’ I knew was a neighbor of Winnie the Pooh and Piglet.
theShizaan | August 22, 2007 at 3:47 pm
I think you need to create a “Loser” section for your last 4 posts!
Bite Me! | August 22, 2007 at 3:48 pm
@21 – fuckin troll. now im confused who’s trollin who. too … many.. troll-e’s!!! i loved those chewy candies.. yummmmm..
p0nk | August 22, 2007 at 3:48 pm
who the fuck let her into Bed, Bath, & Beyond?
Bern | August 22, 2007 at 3:49 pm
Foxy Brown? She’s still famous? Are you sure? I think I might remember her from 1998 … but I could be thinking of the one black girl that went to my high school.
adeliza | August 22, 2007 at 3:49 pm
That is one evil looking woman.
schack | August 22, 2007 at 3:57 pm
Would you assholes stop talking about me and my dead brother.
kelli-danielley | August 22, 2007 at 3:59 pm
Fuck a racist. No Mexicans = no burritos. No blacks = no Kobe.
God Bless America, and all my tan friends.
BlohansDeviatedSeptum | August 22, 2007 at 4:00 pm
They are only picking on her cause she’s white. I mean black. I mean cause she’s a woman . I mean a rapper. ah fuck it, enjoy Rikers idiot.
Ruby | August 22, 2007 at 4:04 pm
Foxy Brown who? More like Fat Fucking Ugly Green Eyeshadow Broad.
Ruby | August 22, 2007 at 4:05 pm
lol@31 – loving your handle, dude. Now if you could only incorporate “biatcho” in there someplace.
lambman | August 22, 2007 at 4:07 pm
I don’t actually know who she is, aside from being somebody who gets arrested a lot. Everytime I think I know a song of hers it just turns out to be Lil Kim on a bad day.
BaldAsBritney | August 22, 2007 at 4:10 pm
Brown? yes. Foxy? notsomuch
BaldAsBritney | August 22, 2007 at 4:12 pm
#31 you forgot No Canadians= no killer hemp
Skip Smith | August 22, 2007 at 4:13 pm
The comments by the Fish are actually pretty funny today. Housewives can’t read and the Lohan family crashed their schooner into the Mayflower. You’ve been drinking!
somewhereinthemiddle | August 22, 2007 at 4:14 pm
Wait the good news is that she is knocked up and unmarried?
Maybe she should hook up with Naomi and they can share tips on how to assault people with common household objects. “No use a bag of oranges so it doesn’t leave a bruise.”
Veggie, I like the animal testing comment.
Morning Wood | August 22, 2007 at 4:20 pm
She should hook up with Bobby Brown the wife beater.Two thugs in a pod.
They could beat the shit out of each other and no one would care…
Chauncey Gardner | August 22, 2007 at 4:49 pm
Race aside, that’s a total fucking cavewoman.
ssdd | August 22, 2007 at 5:11 pm
Her big long fake eyelashes to her face…………………. is like a fat person eating a candy bar and drinking a diet coke……………..
Its like ….wtf is the point?………………
Shallow Val | August 22, 2007 at 5:33 pm
Bring oooon the funny!!!
She should be arrested for wearing the hideous eye shadow. Funny how she has real decent, angular features yet shes’ a complete whackjob who hasn’t had nothing but bad press for the last….um….what is it like 8 years?
Pobrecita. Burn the witch, burn to ash and bone…..(QOTSA)
Shallow Valeria | August 22, 2007 at 5:38 pm
19 Duchess – you’re right about that 99% stuff. Everyone is going to have great-looking dusky skin in the future.
And on the hind end of that comment, why do non-latin people think that everyone is mexican? I’m drowning here in Guatemalans, Dominicans and Puerto Ricans? Thank goodness we’re getting more Argentinians, Chileans, and Venezuelans to mix it up a little.
Sheesh!
Observant cowgirl AKA Beasty boy/girl | August 22, 2007 at 6:05 pm
Hey! Fish removed her glasses and untied her braids! Fish is feeling amorous!Meoww! He is getting so tricky! First the line crossing out o’ verbage and now this magical chair/picture trick! Tricky! Tricky!
Canadian Cowgirl | August 22, 2007 at 6:09 pm
Hey! You know what they call cameltoe in Canada (I almost said “Candida” which she probably has too) right?
nagger please | August 22, 2007 at 6:18 pm
Was she in the planet of the apes?
Kermit | August 22, 2007 at 6:23 pm
She looks like a muppet
Punchline cowgirl | August 22, 2007 at 6:24 pm
Okay 46, I’ll take the bait. What do they call cameltoe in Canada? Moose knuckle? Really? I didn’t know that ! LMFAO!
nagger please | August 22, 2007 at 6:35 pm
Lynching was the only way to keep the cavemen negroes in line.. That’s why every negro country has a dictator. If you give them any freedom they will act like animals.. They prove it all the time.. They perform best on a leash..