Explosions At Boston Marathon Confirmed As Bombs (UPDATE: Nobody Knows WTF)

April 15th, 2013 // 57 Comments
Boston Marathon Explosion

This was going to be a post about Teen Mom Farrah‘s sex tape, but two explosions just went off at the finish line of the Boston Marathon with unconfirmed reports flying around Twitter that police have done a controlled explosion of a homemade device that failed to go off, and a gas explosion is probably now definitely ruled out. As of right now, there are few facts to go on, but as Charles Pierce pointed out on Esquire, along with it being Tax Day and happening in Boston, this date had special significance to guys like Timothy McVeigh. Or Obama did it to take our guns. Whichever you prefer.

Thoughts and prayers to the victims and their families,

- The Superficial

UPDATE: NY Post reports suspect already in custody at hospital. Idiot was hit by his own shrapnel.

UPDATE: Or not. I’ll stop updating now.

NOTE: Ridiculous Vine video of the blast.

h/t Deadspin


  1. Cock Dr

    Remember that first reports from such incidents are often completely wrong.

    • JC

      And for those not in the area, the NY Post is basically a tabloid, so don’t put too much stock into it until an actual reputable source chimes in.

  2. Captain Jerk

    What is it with the Black Pope and his Vatican and the Knights of Malta and April?
    April 19, 1993 – Waco Siege
    April 19, 1995 – The Oklahoma City bombing
    April 15, 2013 – Today’s bombing

  3. Cher X

    Wow. I just read about limbs flying by people. Seriously. I’m in shock. Man….I hate people sometimes.

  4. Guest

    I keep seeing some reports saying 12 dead, but most are saying 2 dead. That is a huge difference!

  5. I hate this fucking world.

  6. Blow up Bieber not Boston, it doesn’t make sense!

  7. I know it's inappropriate, but

    I laughed when the one runner fell down while the security guards that were way closer didn’t even stagger.

    I’ll feel horrible if it turns out he was hit by something.

  8. hamiltonsP

    looks like some of the runners are completely ignoring whatever happened there in order to get to the finish line and complete the race

  9. [IMG]http://i48.tinypic.com/dma5b9.jpg[/IMG]

    Facebook page for the victims went up two days before the bombing!

  10. Goose

    The “suspect” in custody is a “person of interest”. Cops don’t declare someone a suspect until they’re handcuffed. But yes, they have a Saudi national under guard at the hospital.

  11. The “suspect” in custody is a “person of interest”. Cops don’t declare someone a suspect until they’re handcuffed. But yes, they have a Saudi national under guard at the hospital.

  12. Skippy86

    When saw this picture I thought it was the homecoming parade scene from Animal House.

  13. RayJ

    Alright, who gave Chloe the beef & bean burritto?

  14. Isn’t DIEversity wonderful?

  15. What the actual fuck is wrong with people?

  16. Sean

    New York Post says a Saudi national is in custody.

    • Post pulled that out of their ass, and it’s been widely refuted by the Boston PD.


      • If it turns out that it’s a Saudi national, will we get an apology?

      • Doubtful. When you are convinced you are saving the world from the evil that is the racism of the white man, and his unwillingness to contribute to the Greater Good, common sense and even common decency are not seen as sacrifices. Just because this attack is completely different from the MO of McVeigh (who is of course now dead via execution, as opposed to tenured at the University of Chicago), who directly attacked a Government building, murdering its occupants to make his deranged point as opposed to random civilians in the open, with the latter entirely consistent in form and fashion with that of Islamic terrorists the world over, well. . .That just does not seem to matter. It still might be whitey. Bet it was the Tea Party, they have such a record of involvement with these things. But whatever you do, just don’t rush to judgement about that Saudi on a student Visa, as there is no historical precedent for their involvement in such things.

        Right? I mean, unless you want to dredge up bad memories of 9/11 and all.

      • Only rampant wild speculation can save us now.

      • With speculation, however wild, at least eyes are open and when the truth emerges it can be recognized and acknowledged. It’s shoving one’s head in the sand and ignoring the most likely Reality which is pathetic. And, attempting to shift blame for partisan political reasons, in ANY direction, is abhorrent.

      • Sean

        Um, no, the Post didn’t make it up. His apartment has just been searched and bags and bags have been removed from his place.
        His roommate said he hadn’t seen him since three days before the attack.

      • Dude was cleared. Poor kid was tackled by some guy because he “looked suspicious” being foreign at an internationally attended race and running away from a bomb like everyone around him. The police didn’t have him in custody as a suspect, and until this morning nobody confirmed anything except to say he got tackled by some idiot, was cleared and let go. Post went with their own horseshit and shit-ass reporting.

        More here:


  17. sexyman48

    The guy in the orange shirt did it, he’s the only one not surprised by the explosion. Or he just really wants to win.

  18. Fish sucks lefty balls

    your joke about McVeigh and guns is looking pretty stupid. So desperate to make this the doing of your political opponents, buy yet so wrong.

  19. I was just thinking to myself that we haven’t had an outbreak of good old fashioned xenophobia in a while.

  20. BlindDude

    what the fuck is wrong with you dumb fucks? lets make jokes of innocent people getting hurt.. YOU are the ones that deserve taking shrapnel to the groin. Fucking asshats.

  21. A Canadian

    The USA is my friend, my ally, and my neighbor.
    My heart goes out to you, as a people you deserve better than this – and I’m sorry.
    I love the Superficial but that doesn’t mean I can’t tip my hat to a noble people, even at the worst of times.
    Godspeed, and I hope you find out the cause and kick some freekin ass.

  22. A couple of the runners said they thought it was a cannon signaling the end of the race. You have to figure they’ve got tunnel vision, just seeing the finish line, thinking ‘oh thank GOD it’s over!’ so their response time is off.
    This, was just horrible though, all those people, hurt, and killed. I hope they find out who did it and put them away, forever.

    • tar and feather all politicians

      Seeing as the Massachusetts Legistature got rid of the death penalty (even though the PEOPLE overwhelmingly wanted it) last term, if they do catch him you’ll probably get your wish.

    • ohonore

      I was there. I finished less than three minutes before the bombs went off and I thought it was cannons…the first time. When the second one went off it was a madhouse- we all knew what was happening. My teammate and I ran like crazy and got the hell out of there. Still shaking now, hours later.

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