Evangeline Lilly is sophisticated

February 27th, 2006 // 63 Comments

evangeline-lilly-bikini.jpgI don’t know what to think about this picture of Evangeline Lilly. I suspect that somewhere on the beach, a six-year-old girl is crying her eyes out because Xena stole her swimsuit. Some people find her very attractive. I’m tempted to invite these people to my house, draw some boobs on my refrigerator and watch them fall in love – because there’s very little to differentiate them. Except the fridge won’t pee its pants when you fill it full of beer.

superficial

  1. Romeo Foxtrot

    refrigerator? are we looking at the same pics bro?

  2. How is this even considered hot. She looks 12 with flabby legs.

  3. Akapee

    She doesn’t look bad at all. She just needs a nicer swimsuit. She probably picked up this swimsuit from a salvation army store….and it blows.

  4. Her bathing suit is so wack. You know what’s wierd about her? She has no waist. Look at her, there is no waist to ass ratio.

    She’s a small tank.

  5. ApplewtoAwesome

    Yeah, she has all the curves of a Texas interstate

  6. Mary45

    Wow I just clicked back to the Superficial and saw this… I’m scared! With a body like that, maybe something a lot smaller, like one of those micro bikinis from wicked weasel…

  7. HollyJ

    Who knew Howard Stern could look so good in a batheing suit?

  8. Kevin

    I’d like to check out her ice box…

  9. robot_turkey

    That second picture makes me want to beat her. I can’t explain it. Perhaps it’s because she looks like she’s skipping, it could be the flabby, saggy buttcheeks and her untoned thighs. I don’t know, but looking at it makes her want to slap her silly. Oh, and Dom’s gay.

  10. robot_turkey

    Makes *ME* want to slap her silly. Although, she might want to slap herself silly.

  11. SMF121490

    A grown woman actually wore that monstrosity in public? Either get Evangeline a sand castle making kit or give the swimsuit back to your three year old niece.
    Not a good look for her.

  12. bone_daddio

    Now we know what happened to the mink that Madonna had skinned for those diamond studded eyelashes!

  13. MustangLaura

    I feel sorry for her fiance. Her boobs must be LOST too. Seriously did she raid Mrs. Federlines doggie room cause I swear Ive seen that swim suit before.

  14. Ez-EEEE

    evangeline who?

  15. frangly

    I can’t believe no one has commented on her incredible abs. I wouldn’t care what my legs looked like if I had abs like that, gee whiz. No one’s perfect in every body part.

    And yeah, some of us are straight up and down, no waist, narrow hips. I’m the same way. And they say what makes a woman attractive is a .7/1.0 ratio of waist to hips. Never gonna happen here. Glad I’m not the only one.

  16. Craig & "em"

    I don’t mean to step on anyone’s toes…but I figured I’d help rename this.
    (TOP 3 Titles)

    3.) Evangeline Takes RETARDED Photo
    2.) Evangeline Wears RETARDED Tutu
    (drumroll please)
    1.) Evangeline Is RETARDED

  17. Baroness

    God, I am the same way, #15.

    I do have nice legs, but am completely straight up and down. Just…no waist.

    I fail to see how she is ‘untoned’ though, guys. She looks very fit to me.

  18. Geno

    She’s so hot. Everyone is ragging on her? Please! You guys would stammer & wouldn’t be able to speak if she even looked at you. She’s beautiful with a great body. Get over it..

  19. jennifer11

    i’m sure just mere moments after that photograph was taken a dog bit the bottom, pulling it down just a bit and someone used the image to sell sunscreen.

    if that’s not what happened…she should have left it on the clearance rack at goodwill.

  20. ostar

    Just curious…is that the same suit as the one she was wearing in gq (or something of that sort) but looked rather cute in? confused, whatever

  21. She looks somewhat attractive when she has all of her clothes on.

    But this just creeps me out.

  22. VanillaSalTyBaLLs

    I’d hit it … but I’d feel like a pedophile if she was wearing that get-up

  23. mags

    I think she’s pretty hot despite the lack of a waist, but…that suit makes Maggie cry.

    This is why I enjoyed working at a swimsuit store, I prevented horrible stuff like this happening.

    Yes, I did feel righteous.

  24. ESQ

    In response to # 22 – I was thinking similarly…

    In response to #3 – LMAO!

    I personally think she looks like a pedophile’s dream – sick bitch. Otherwise I think she is cute if she wasn’t wearing that bathing suit.

  25. gogoboots

    i say no to ruffles on bathing suits. she’s not 5 years old no more, so what the hell…!

  26. Escribo

    Maybe if she wore it backwards it would create the illusion of a waist.

  27. Devil Is Chrome

    There should have been a moment in the dressing room where she turned to the mirror and went “Oh my god! No-no!” sigh. “It looked cute on the rack.”

    She’s is obviously deficient in this natural defense mechanism and might have to be euthanized immediately.

  28. anja

    37 years old…

  29. anja

    correction, 27, but still. couple of decades over the swimming costume.

  30. smartass

    Any man who thinks that is attractive is under serious pedophilia suspicion. There’s nothing on that body that suggests woman. No boobs, waist, hips or butt. She’s a stick w/long hair.

  31. Wait thats a nice body? The fact that guys will sleep with her, is a given 90% of guys have no shame anyway they sleep with anything. Me personally, I do not think she is attractive, YES with clothes on she might look good but she doesnt with clothes off. But do not tell me those are nice abs, or butt or whatever else you think is nice on that.

  32. downshine

    who the hell is she? like seriously….

  33. senin

    Was Nabakov at the beach????

  34. Porcelyn

    I don’t even see a picture

  35. JC

    Lucy Lawless (Xena)is not even comparible to Evangeline. Lilly is a natural beauty, although this is an awful pic. Little Bo Peep goes to the beach, yuck.

  36. Anie900

    yeah she doesnt look so bad on lost… maybe because they only ever show her face, she has a nice face, much nicer than xena at anyrate

  37. subtle-rift

    Agreed, she has a much nicer face than Xena. Speaking of which, if anything discussed here looks like a refrigerator, it’s Xena’s face. Thinking about it, that would make some awsome photoshopping.

  38. HughJorganthethird

    Ever wonder why this chcik is always photographed at the beach? It’s because she’s Canadian and right now it’s like 30 fucking below zero. I’d live at the beach to if I had her cash. No real point to this post , just wanted to bitch about about the cold.

    Doesn’t Tom Cruise worship Xena or something?

  39. she has a really hot face….but she has a tad bit of a manly figure. Her body aint as hot as her face.

  40. dimestoredetective

    A little junk in the trunk ain’t bad.
    It allows my hand print on her ass to linger longer.

  41. pinkraindrop6

    okay i love how stars think they can wear anything they want. if i ever wore that out in public, i would be laughed out of society. she really looks like she thinks she’s so superior for wearing that..

  42. krisdylee

    reminds me of the time when i told the salesman to be honest when i tried on one of these frilly bikinis and bless his honest soul, he looked at me in the fitting room and slowly shook his head. he saved me from something like this, albeit on amuch smaller scale.

  43. MonkeyBrain

    “Boobs on a refrigerator” – my thoughts EXACTLY!

    Okay, well maybe not *exactly*, (I wasn’t clever enough to come up with the refrigerator analogy), but I DO remember thinking that she was a waistless, hipless freakazoid.

    Geez! I don’t know if those frills were supposed to make her figure looks less cylindrical, but they obviously had the opposite effect.

    Think about sex with her: There’s no traction! Your hands would just keep slipping off every time you tried to grab her waist for harder thrusting. I bet she wishes now that her abs weren’t so “spectacular”. At least with love handles, those poor shmucks who end up in bed with her would have something to hold onto.

  44. HollyJ

    “TransAmerica: The Year After”

  45. iheartreznor

    #33, you’ve made my day.

    She really is quite dumpy from behind in that picture…

  46. sqongo

    You jealous hags,you wished you looked that good,yummy.The reason shes muscley is because she does martial arts!!

  47. Zapp Brannigan

    I’m steadily growing tired of her, her co-stars and LOST the show. They’re all steadily becoming annoying.

  48. Tetsuo

    I’d still fuck her. Then again, I’d fuck a black snake with a festered asshole so long as someone held its head.

  49. Baroness

    #43: She looks like a woman; they come in all shapes and sizes. Get real, and get out once in a while.

  50. vosh

    Before you rush to judgement on these photos, you should look the shots of her with this suit on in this months issue of Esquire. Trust me, she is HOT in that bathing suit, but these pictures do her no justice.

Leave A Comment