Here’s the alleged Eva Longoria sex tape everybody’s been talking about. Although calling it a sex tape would not only be a lie, it’d be a really big lie. The tape was made for Will Ferrel’s comedy site Funny Or Die and features Eva Longoria with comedian Eric Christian Olsen. In the video Longoria says: “Are you really sure we should be doing this? If it gets out it could be really embarrassing.” Her partner then replies: “Don’t worry baby I’m going to put it somewhere safe – like the glovebox of my car.” Funny? Meh. Cruel? Definitely. I mean, getting everybody’s hopes up about an Eva Longoria sex tape and having it turn out to be this? It’s like promising your kid a Wii for Christmas, and then when Christmas rolls around you kick him really hard in the nuts instead.
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IWONKY | October 2, 2007 at 10:34 am
OOOOOOOOOOOOooohhhh Golly!!!
lizl | October 2, 2007 at 10:35 am
1st :o)
lizl | October 2, 2007 at 10:35 am
fuck
NoTalentDwarf | October 2, 2007 at 10:36 am
Enough said.
Steven Braun | October 2, 2007 at 10:38 am
Now THAT is funny!
IWONKY | October 2, 2007 at 10:39 am
I’m not ever watching another sex tape again, until Britney makes one. Is she still alive?
Barry LeFarge | October 2, 2007 at 10:41 am
Funny but still a let down.
sportsdvl | October 2, 2007 at 10:42 am
#2 – you are just lame. Getting excited about maybe being first on this poll is about as sad as wanting to watch that lawn gnome get tapped by some Frenchman.
Moe Szyslak | October 2, 2007 at 10:44 am
Fish, if you tell my kids what I’m actually getting them for Christmas again, I’m going to rip out your eyes and shove them down your pants so you can watch me kick the crap out of you.
tylerdurden | October 2, 2007 at 10:44 am
Least funny thing I’ve seen in like forever.
Shit4Brains | October 2, 2007 at 10:46 am
#8 – I agree. What a pathetic thing to get excited about………being first! Probably had to go whack off after.
peacebone | October 2, 2007 at 10:46 am
i lol’d
Me | October 2, 2007 at 10:50 am
hehehehe! I thought this was really quite funny! =)
Riotboy | October 2, 2007 at 10:51 am
I have a sex tape on eBay.
/$2.40 so far
Mdiz | October 2, 2007 at 10:52 am
weak
KC | October 2, 2007 at 10:53 am
“Funny or Die?” I choose DIE!
T | October 2, 2007 at 10:53 am
It’s actually funny how corresponding to this news about 10 different torrents claiming to be the video were online. Supposedly they all had DRM that asked you to go to some site to sign up for more celebrity sex tapes, such as that “Britney Spears” one.
They sure took advantage of that.
MiG | October 2, 2007 at 10:58 am
LOL…loving it!
* MISS UNIVERSE | October 2, 2007 at 10:59 am
For her sake, everything worked out fine.
she got tons of free publicity
and it did not mar her career
chaz | October 2, 2007 at 11:10 am
i can’t beat off to this…. or can i?
blpressure | October 2, 2007 at 11:19 am
Not that funny really. It’s no “The Landlord.” I did chuckle at the “That sounds like crap” line.
blpressure | October 2, 2007 at 11:23 am
Watch “Perry Hilton DUI” Now that is funny!
David Beckham Look-a-like | October 2, 2007 at 11:24 am
This thing is really crap!
Rzwrong | October 2, 2007 at 11:41 am
This epitomizes what is unfunny in the world.
First take something good and wholesome like a sex tape and then shit all over it with some of the crappest unfunny crap that’s ever been made, then release via website to a sad loser like me.
End result: A postal internet surfer, watch out ethernet switcher I’m comin’ for ya!
lambman | October 2, 2007 at 11:52 am
Well now I know which one ISN’T my favorite Olsen twin!
Leah | October 2, 2007 at 11:54 am
hahahaha this is awesome
lastangelman | October 2, 2007 at 11:56 am
My nuts! my Nuts! PLease ! Stop kicking! MY NUts! Ow! Ow! Ow! oW! Please! Stop! NOw! Ow! Hurt! So! Good! Can’t! Make ! Babies! Any! MOre! Ow! Ow1 Ow! Oh YEah! oh! Yeah!
where’s … where’s … my … cigarettes?
norton | October 2, 2007 at 12:17 pm
The non-sex, sex tape. Funny shit.
fdsffdsfdsfdsdffd | October 2, 2007 at 12:46 pm
You are an idiot superfish. Let me guess you thought that was a sex-tape in the first place.
steph | October 2, 2007 at 12:47 pm
“eva longoria?”
LLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOL
I FUCKING LOVE IT WHEN HE PUSHES HER AND THEN SAYS ‘EVA LONGORIA?’
lol.
hilarous.
ipa | October 2, 2007 at 1:41 pm
this shit was so beyond lame i had to forward it.
missmarnip | October 2, 2007 at 2:00 pm
i was afraid i would get to see a real sex tape.
THIS IS FUNNY!! out of all the “desperate housewifes” i liked eva least but now. she looks good and can make fun of herself.
or is this just a tactic for cover up for a real sex tape somewhere in the net….?
Rachiebabie | October 2, 2007 at 2:08 pm
She is gorgeous, and classy. So shut the fuck up, go hate on britney or something. HA Losers.
jason | October 2, 2007 at 2:11 pm
I accidently stumbled upon the new sex tape of Eva Longoria and her Hubby Tony Parker. The tape is pretty hot with alot of sucking and hot banging. It was definitly worth the $1 to view this tape, heres the link for you guys – enjoy!
http://www.linkxdirect.info/evalongoria.php
ninjarobot | October 2, 2007 at 3:07 pm
Who is this guy?
He sounds exactly like Ferrel. As Ron Burgundy.
Italian Stallion | October 2, 2007 at 3:18 pm
I made a sex tape with Terry Schivo. We called it “Tube-Steak”…………..
Megina | October 2, 2007 at 3:39 pm
Oh my God. Eva Longoria looks just like Kylie Minogue until night vision.
Black Tuesday | October 2, 2007 at 4:33 pm
Fat and ugly bitches that have boyfriends are rejoicing. Their male prisoners will now pay attention to them again and stop the obsessive hunt for the fantasized moment of escape. The lights will still be off during coitus and the poor men will dream of Eva nevah gonna get that sex tape Longoria.
ali | October 2, 2007 at 4:37 pm
@ 36 haha. too far, too far.
toonkinstein | October 2, 2007 at 4:44 pm
I kicked a nutcracker in the nuts once….knocked out it’s teeth…..it was ASKING FOR IT
dammit
ssssh | October 2, 2007 at 7:17 pm
This tape was made years ago as a parody on the Paris Hilton sextape… The real sextape is with her husband, and it has some real sexual action in it.
not-her | October 2, 2007 at 7:22 pm
hey guys.. that’s NOT eva longoria!!!
this is just a spoof of the real one that’s out there
cookie monsta | October 2, 2007 at 11:34 pm
“that sounds like crap…” becos it fken is, that’s the worst sex tape EVER…
of course thats Nosey Longoria, who else could seriously sport a profile like that one?
Jan OLeary | October 3, 2007 at 1:42 am
Yesss it’s the guy from Beerfest. Vwhy don’t you Americans go back to your Zima’s and Smirnoff ices vwhile I enjoy zee sex vith the Eva Longoria.
Pure Loving Godly Person | October 3, 2007 at 2:26 am
Longoria in Sex Tape Shocker?
AP Photo/Chris Pizzello
“Desperate Housewives” beauty Eva Longoria has become the latest star caught up in a sex tape scandal after bedroom footage of her and new husband Tony Parker was reportedly stolen from her home and leaked online.
The explicit tape, which has already started appearing on pay-per-view adult Web sites, features intimate footage of the newlyweds having sex, according to British newspaper The Sun.
This is the second time the Latina has been linked to such reports — in 2006, Longoria was rumored to have starred in a Paris Hilton-style sex tape, but it was later proved to be a hoax.
Representatives for both Longoria and Parker have yet to comment.
The news breaks as Longoria appears in a new online spoof sex tape film for Web site FunnyOrDie.com, in which she bounces on a bed in sexy lingerie with a male pal she calls Perry.
Longoria and Perry also stage a pillow fight and the actress asks, “Alright, are you sure no one’s ever gonna see this?”
She pretended the hoax sex tape was recorded before she landed a job on “Desperate Housewives,” joking, “I have an audition tomorrow for something called ‘Desperate Housewives,’” to which her partner scoffs, “That sounds like crap!”
MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE | October 3, 2007 at 12:14 pm
HAHAHAHAHAHA THAT WAS THE FUNNIEST THING LIKE EVERRRRR I LOVED IT
Schtickish.com | October 3, 2007 at 3:14 pm
I’m fairly sure this was done for Saturday Night Live, YEARS AGO. I doubt Longoria would just take the time to do it for Will Ferrell’s web site.
Watch Real Eva Longoria Sex Tape Now | October 4, 2007 at 9:49 am
Enjoy
El Ces | October 5, 2007 at 3:00 pm
This is cute, but I want the real thing.
michze | October 6, 2007 at 2:11 am
Seen this before? It’s much hotter.
http://videos.qweki.com/f56155d7350bdb696b5c
I truly think it’s quite funny: http://videos.qweki.com/e53223dfadf142831fbd