According to Page Six, Eva Longoria’s boyfriend, Tony Parker of the San Antonio Spurs, is not too happy with what some French papers are saying about his girl (hint: it has something to do with sex or sex-related activities).
“The French tabloids are regurgitating a bunch of old interviews I gave a long time ago where I said I wouldn’t mind dating several guys at once. So now they are printing: ‘Eva cheats on Tony!’ and Tony is so upset he offered to call the mayor of Paris who knows the tabloid people to try and stop it. He just wants to protect me.”
I don’t know if the mayor of Paris actually has the ability to make the tabloids shut up, but if he does, that would make him some sort of super-virile God. And that? Is very confusing for me. Here I have an article about Eva Longoria who’s both hot and – if ABC is to be believed – desperate, and that’s everything I’ve ever wanted in a woman. Yet I’m fantasizing about a Parisian mayor who I assume is an overweight bald man with a baret and a pornstache. But… you know what, damnit? The heart wants what it wants. He’s ridiculously powerful and we’re in love and I regret nothing.