Why, Porn Parodies? Why?

October 16th, 2013 // 32 Comments
E.T. Porn Parody Capri Anderson

Oh, good, he’s bleeding from the eye just like in the mov- wait.

One of the very first movies I saw in the theater was E.T., so it has a special meaning to me along with still holding up as a masterpiece that mops the floor with 99% of most summer blockbusters. So imagine my surprise to find the image above in my inbox along with a link to a trailer for E.T. XXX starring Capri Anderson who you may remember as the hooker/porn star Charlie Sheen locked in his hotel room while on a trip to New York with Denise Richards and their kids because families have to learn to share interests. Anyway, before someone asks when I started covering porn parodies, what do you call this shit? Hmm? That’s right. Walk away now.

 

Surprisingly, this is relatively SFW, but note I said “relatively” before you gather everyone around and make popcorn like I know you have in your desk, Ted.

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Photo: Courtesy of Dreamzone Entertainment

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  1. I am completely, 100% behind this film. Full disclosure though, I also supported that one with the gargoyles nailing some chick, and the other one with pterodactyls nailing a chick.

  2. Senor_Borracho

    I love this

  3. Senor_Borracho

    I loved this movie…..when it was done in 1985….with THe Hedgehog nonetheless.
    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0136100/combined

  4. I’m reminded of the joke that wasn’t very funny unless you were in grade school, like I was when ET came out:

    ET walks up to a farmer, pokes him with his finger and says “Beep, beep, beep.”
    The farmer is a bit puzzled, and asks ET what he is doing.
    ET pokes the farmer with his finger and says “Beep, beep, beep.”
    The farmer gets angry and tells ET, “Do that again, and I’ll cut your dick off.”
    ET pokes the farmer with his finger and says “Beep, beep, beep.”
    The farmer, now incensed, grabs his ax and ties ET down to castrate him. He looks at ET’s crotch and says, “Hey, you don’t have a dick. How do you fuck?”
    ET pokes the farmer with his finger and says “Beep, beep, beep.”

  5. joe

    You know creativity has gone to shit when porno parodies are remakes.

  6. Inner Retard

    I feel violated. – first time I said that about porn.

  7. Cock Dr

    I didn’t see any signs of Farrah Abraham so I clicked it.
    Waste of time…but no damage done to corneas.

  8. If they can parody this classic Spielberg flick, just imagine the possibilities with his other films. Like “The Color Purple”- no cheesy re-title necessary. The name already has a nice penis allusion.

  9. Whoa…what the hell will a “Chitty Chitty BANG BANG” remake be like? They won’t even have to rename it!

  10. Where's Dildo

    Still a better love story than Kris and Bruce Jenner

  11. Dirty Travolta

    This remake will go down in history .

  12. I already have a favorite “E.T. look alike” alien porn.

    (Very NSFW)

    http://efukt.com/1793_E.T._Alien_Sex_2.html

  13. cc

    The brunette at 1:38 is pretty cute…don’t know who she is.

  14. I always thought that a porn version of that show where there’s a guy and a girl working on home improvement projects would be a hit – since when I’m doing some project around the house, I usually get bored at some point and end up watching porn instead, and when I’m watching porn, I end up feeling guilty I’m not doing something more worthwhile with my time, like fixing the toilet. Plus, this would all fit into my recurring fantasy that I’d come home and find some hot chick fixing all the broken shit around my house, and I’d bang her until I got bored of that, then she’d go back to fixing all my shit.

  15. Porn parodies these days are usually very shitty. The sex is boring and there’s no anal. If a porn movie doesn’t have anal it better be bringing something else to the table, squirting, fisting etc, but they don’t even do that. Lame.

  16. Art Crow

    One of the very first movies I saw in the theater was E.T., and I had nightmares for 6 years because of it. I can miss this porno.

  17. WTF, was the budget for this $500 and a couple of sticks of gum and some Snickers?

  18. Miss_Moppet

    This is at least the third XXX ET Parody out there. Film Snob reviewed a Hungarian one and a US one. Both looked better than this one.

  19. Mooby

    Apparently “penis breath” stopped being an insult…

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