Eminem fires back at Mariah Carey

July 31st, 2009 // 101 Comments

In response to Nick Cannon’s open letter and Mariah Carey’s latest video, Eminem has released his latest song “The Warning,” and it’s pretty much everything you’d expect from Eminem. Via PopCrunch:

Yeah, what you gonna say? I’m lucky? Tell the public that I was so ugly that you had to be drunk to me?
Second base? What the fuck you tell Nick, punk?
In the second week we was dry humping. It’s gotta count for something.
Listen, girly. Surely you don’t want me to talk about how I nutted early cos ejaculated early and bus all over your belly, and you almost started hurling and said I was gross, go get a towel you’re stomachs curling. Or maybe you do.
But if I’m embarrassing me, I’m embarrassing you and don’t you dare say it isn’t true.
As long as the song’s getting airplay I’m dissing you.

You know what would be awesome about this song? If it were 2001 and more than five people know who the hell Nick Cannon is. That said, Eminem’s willingness to embarrass himself doesn’t exactly make everything he says true. For example, just because I’m willing to admit I only have a two foot long penis that doesn’t mean I can honestly claim to be Spider-man. — Or does it?

Only reason I dissed you in the first place is because you denied seeing me
Now I’m pissed off
Sit back and relax homey, kick back and relax, grab a six pack while I kick s
Yeah Dre’s sick track, perfect way to get back
Wanna hear something wick wack?
I got the exact same tattoo that’s on Nick’s back
I’m obsessed now
Oh gee, is that supposed to be me in the video with the goatee
Wow Mariah, I didn’t expect her to go balls out
Bitch, shut the fuck up before I put all them phone calls out you
made to my house when you was wild n out before Nick
When you was on my dick and give you somethin to smile about
How many times you fly to my house? Still trying to count
Better shut your lying mouth if you don’t want Nick finding out
You probably think since it’s been so long if i had something on you I
woulda did it by now
On the contrary, Mary Poppins, I’m mixing our studio session down and
sending it to mastering to make it loud
Enough dirt on you to murder you
This is what the fuck I do
Mariah, it ever occur to you that I still have pictures?
However you prefer to do and goes for you too, Nick, you got
You think I’m scared of you?
You gonna ruin my career you better get one
Like I’ma sit and fight with you over some slut bitch cunt who made
me put up with her psycho ass over 6 months and only spread her
legs to let me hit once
Yeah, what you gonna say? I’m lucky? Tell the public that I was so
ugly that you had to be drunk to me?
Second base? What the fuck you tell Nick, punk?
In the second week we was dry humping. It’s gotta count for something.
Listen, girly. Surely you don’t want me to talk about how I nutted
early cos ejaculated early and bus all over your belly, and you almost
started hurling and said I was gross, go get a towel you’re stomachs
curling. Or maybe you do.
But if I’m embarrassing me, I’m embarrassing you and don’t you dare
say it isn’t true.
As long as the song’s getting airplay I’m dissing you.
I’m a hair away from getting carried away and getting sued.
I was gonna stop at 16. This is 32. This is 34 bars. We ain’t even a
third of the way through.
Damn, Slim. Mariah played you. Mariah who?
Oh did I say “whore”, Nick? I meant a liar too.
Like I’ve been goin off on you all this time for no reason.
Girl you out ya alcholic mind. Check ya wine cellar. Look at all the
amounts of wine.
Like I sit around and think about you all the time.
I just think this is funny when I pounce you on a rhyme.
But it now i’m about to draw the line.
And for you to cross it that’s a mountain that I doubt you wanna climb.
I can describe areas of your house that you wouldn’t find on an episode of Cribs
A blubba load ribs (?) so don’t go opening your jibs cos every time
you do it’s just another load of fibs
I ain’t saying this shi*t again, ho. You know what it is.
It’s a warning shot for before I blow up ya whole spot
Call my bluff and I’ll release every fucking thing I got
Including the voicemails right before you flipped your top
When me and Luis were tryin’ to stick two CD’s in the same spot
(Slim Shady ?????? I love you)
I love you too
Let me whisper sweet nothings into your ear, boo. Now what you say?
(It’s nothing)
Guess what I’ll do?
I’ll refresh your memory when you said “I want you”
Now should I keep going or should we call truce?
(You think you’re cute, right? Hahaha)
You bet your sweet ass I do
(I’m Mary Poppins, b)
And I’m Superman, mmm
(Mary P. Slim Shady)
Comin’ at you
So if you’ll still be my (babygirl)
Then I’ll still be your (Superhero, Wilma M.)
Yeah, I’m right here
(You like this)
Nope. Not anymore, Dear.
It cuts like a (knife) when I tell ya get a (life)
But I’m movin on with mine
Nick, is that your (wife)
Well tell her to shut her mouth then I’ll leave her alone
If she don’t (sing this script?) then I’ma just keep goin
(I see Mary Ann. Mary Ann’s saying “cut the tape, cut the tape”. Knife!)

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. Personally, I hate work “nutted”. This is my “” Nutella, that reminds me of weird German krauts chocalate spread dirt to build support and Kobe Bryant were. Thank God he’s ass raped the hotel staff and put an end to marketing in the States. Trust me, do not mix the chocolate and jizz. I know from experience.

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