Emily Ratajkowski Will Sell You ‘Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare’ Now

While today will determine the political future of our country until the presidential campaign season starts tomorrow, none of that involves tits and guns in exosuits, so America has but zero fucks to give as it prepares to celebrate today’s true holiday. So here’s Emily Ratajkowski in the new Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare trailer which is some SJW horseshit. What do SLUTS know about GAMES? (Did I do that right? I’m still learning how to speak sad little fuck.) Also, here’s Conan with a new Clueless Gamer because Activision’s marketing is that strong. Although apparently not strong enough to offer me money or even a coupon, so I don’t know why I just posted all of this. – *looks at Emily Ratajkowski’s breasts again* – Yes, my master…

EDIT: I love how almost half of this is ripping on the military funeral minigame, and yes, those words just happened:

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