Elsa Hosk Flexin’ Sex on Some Old Ladies

Last week I noted that the Victoria’s Secret fashion show in Shanghai was ultimately a giant snoozefest. Mostly because it was given way more hype than it was actually worth (although Bella Hadid’s nipples did come out as promised) and only one person fell down on stage. After returning to America, supermodel and wannabe revolutionary war re-enactor Elsa Hosk hit the NYC sidewalk wearing a slutty General Cornwallis costume or something. That’s what’s happening now. That’s where I’m going with this…

If you look closely at these pictures you’ll notice the gaggle of ladies from some poor flyover state ogling over Hosk as she attacks the sidewalk with only the kind of ferocity you find in fashion. You can’t really knock them for their bafflement, it’s doubtful they’ve ever seen anything like Elsa Hosk walk into the Long John Silvers that they hit up every Wednesday afternoon after quilt club.

Then again, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe those blue haired ladies back there are simply sizing up Hosk and reminiscing back to their glory days when they could out-sex any man in Iowa. If that’s the case then you go, ladies. Do the damn thang and keep gettin’ that dick.

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