Ellen DeGeneres & Portia de Rossi getting married while the gettin’s good

May 16th, 2008 // 211 Comments

Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi are taking immediate advantage of the California Supreme Court ruling that struck down the ban on gay marriage. The two plan to wed according to a spy for TMZ who was on the set for the latest episode of Ellen that will air today:

She surprised everyone and announced that she was going to tie the knot with longtime girlfriend, actress Portia de Rossi. Portia was in the crowd and after she made the announcement, the studio audience went wild, giving the two a huge standing O.

To some people, this news is a triumph for civil liberties. To others (*cough*thesouth*cough*), this is worse than 9/11. To me, however, this is just confusing. I mean, who makes the sandwiches? Do they flip a coin or something? I want to say Ellen is the “man,” but then again Portia looks like she could throw some elbows. But those elbows could do some wicked ironing. God, this is tough. Superficial Writer frustrated! Superficial Writer lie on floor of men’s room. Superficial Writer hash this thing out.

UPDATE: Superficial Writer caught Geekologie Writer no wash hands.

Photos: Splash News

  1. george

    hey Vince – the jerk store called. they’re running out of you!

  2. gay4girls

    @45. The very definition of a “tool” is “an implement used in the practice of a vocation” but your very existence seems to demand an expanded redefinition. And I’m pretty sure civilization itself, modern medicine, and even hot water heaters are also “abomination[s] to nature.” Further, I think your reference to people dying in wars is a little insensitive to gay vets (one out seven adult males is “gay,” latent [homophobic] or expressive [homosexual]). Lastly, it’s possible that the masses could vote and say that the world is shaped like a taco but that doesn’t make it true. Thank you.

  3. jrz

    Why do you people care who marries who? You people should go join the Taliban or some shit….they LOVE intolerant fascist douchebags, you’d fit in perfectly.

    PS: 41—did you pop a boner when you called her a whore? did that make you feel goooooooooood?? You’re the reason your father cries when he jerks off.

  4. jrz

    Why do you people care who marries who? You people should go join the Taliban or some shit….they LOVE intolerant fascist douchebags, you’d fit in perfectly.

    PS: 41—did you pop a boner when you called her a whore? did that make you feel goooooooooood?? You’re the reason your father cries when he jerks off.

  5. Wendy

    Folks, read the news. 3 special elections recently, all to replace Republicans who left their positions in deeply Republican districts, all 3 taken by Democrats. The social-issue raving conservatives will make sure McCain loses no matter what Obama does, and the absolutely horrible conditions in the country right now will ensure a large congressional Democratic majority no matter what those candidates do. The Republicans had a clean-sweep of power in government for 6 years and crashed the country like Britney Spears driving her Mercedes. It’s over. They’re done. That’s the way it works. Maybe they’ll get another chances 2 or 3 election cycles from now, but for the next 10 years or so, they’re done.

  6. hey #41 and #45 and any other dipshit that thinks it’s “against nature”, Shut your trap and learn about the world you live in….


  7. Zanna

    @41…..who are you to call ANYONE a whore? You don’t know her. You however, are CLEARLY an idiot.

  8. jrz

    Jrz in stereo! WEE HA!

  9. Or here is another one…


    Whatcha gonna do???? Kill all the gay animals?????? dipshits.

  10. Hecubus

    Busy day, I don’t have time to read the post but just from looking at the pics I wanna say I’m really glad to see Owen Wilson has bounced back so fast. His new girlfriend looks very nice. Wait a go Owen !!

  11. Dolemite

    fucking carpet munchers should get hit by a bus. send them to Burma and let the gooks eat them with some fried rice.

  12. Richard McBeef


    You are obviously stuck in the closet. Probably the kind that watches football and thinks that football is for straight men, only faggots would suggest otherwise. You probably don’t even consciously recognize it is homoerotica for the latent gay. You love it. You love watching sweaty men pile up on top of each other. You love watching a man slap the tight ass of another man. You fantasize about the showers after the game.

    You’re gay, dude. You spent your whole life going to church and hearing about how gay = wrong. Your parents told you being gay is wrong. Now you’re stuck and you fight those homoerotic urges by writing your little homophobic diatribes. You do it because you hate fags right? Maybe you do it because Jesus and your parents told you it was wrong and you hate yourself a little bit. You hate yourself because those thoughts and feelings you have won’t go away. You hate yourself because you are married and have a couple kids, but you just want to post a m4m on the casual encounters section at craigslist. If I just do it once, that doesn’t mean I’m gay right??

    It’s okay. Maybe someday you will have the courage to face your feelings. Until then lay off the homophobia. It’s obvious that you are hiding those urges behind it.

  13. Jrz

    Why Zanna, didn’t you know….#41 is superior to everyone and everything. Can’t you tell by how he/she/it authoratatively tells Apache to suck on it? The power. The ire.

  14. andie

    Ok, I’m irritated so I’m going to bitch a little bit. Ready? Here goes.

    Who would you rather see with a baby, huh? A loving couple that has had to work their asses off and jump through hoops of flame to get the baby at all? Or some whore who keeps on getting pregnant ‘accidentally’ and then collecting more money off the federal tit? Oh and the state tit, don’t forget. What does it matter, ultimately it’s YOUR tit if you pay taxes!

    Dammit, I’m still annoyed. I may bitch more later.

  15. Dixie


    Every female has their own pussy scent. If your pussy has been in hiding all day long or all night long then all females need to wash their pussy before oral. If you let your lover come in your pussy then it will smell no matter what you do. I have my boyfriend come on my body like my breasts because I want to stay fresh all the time. Some guys get use to the fishy smell or musty smell while others would prefer their lover to clean up before oral.

  16. Maelstrom

    #53…WOW….you are really clueless aren’t you. Have fun in Lala Land. Here in the real world we understand that modern medicine as we know it is largely based from an understanding of the NATURAL world, pretty positive that water is a very naturally occuring substance and the chemical reaction induced to make it hot is too. Expanding a knowledgable base to control and contain this natural occurence seems, well it seems like a pretty natural thing to do. Civilization itself is a Natural understanding of one’s surroundings and adapting to them (and without procreation, there can’t be adaptation). Even still, using your logic…what is the good that comes out of being gay? Now I am all about one chosing his/her own path to happiness, just don’t change laws that blatantly oppose nature and ALL religions.

  17. ApacheRose


    Is that why I like football?

    Oops. Someone’s gonna call me a whore again. Your barbs cut me so deeply. /sarcasm.

  18. Hot Dog with a head on it

    I guess Ellen will be carrying the “dick dutys” in her new marriage.
    She appears to be the man in all her relationships anyway, or atleast looks like one, plus , “its” had penis envy for a shlong time.

    Everybody knows California is full of fags anyway…

  19. The Office Whore

    Apache! You whore!! hehe

  20. ApacheRose

    Blatantly oppose nature and ALL religions? And you know all about ALL religions?


  21. ramalamadingdong

    you damn right i’m superior to you. i have my own brain. not like you fucking democrats that only follow your leaders around like the sheep that you are. go tune in to CNN and get off the thread if you can’t handle it. fuck wads.

    apache likes it rough.

  22. Zanna

    @64 – JRZ….He’th thuperior and I bet he wearth thuper thpethal thuperior thtuff.

  23. Zanna

    @64 – JRZ….He’th thuperior and I bet he wearth thuper thpethal thuperior thtuff.

  24. Jrz

    My impersonation of #67 (Maelstrom):

    blub blub blub blub blub
    Uh-guh uh-guh uh-guh
    dooey dooey dooey dooey dooey doooey dooey dooey


  25. coffeebean

    Anexio, I realize that not all homos get married to get a tax break. I know there are fags like you that could never get a girl so you have had to take Tyrone’s dick up your ass so many times that you don’t know any different.

    andie, please take some time to do some research before you make comments that make no sense nor have an ounce of validity.

  26. ApacheRose


    “The power. The ire.”

    The first cousin marriages. The inbreeding.

  27. Zanna

    I was compelled to say that twice. Once for ramalamadingdong’s superiority complex and once for the part of him he keeps in the closet.

  28. caitie

    sweet. gay marriage for the win.

  29. ApacheRose

    HAHAHA! Ohhh, 72. Poor, stupid misinformed 72.

    I’m not a democrat, nor do I watch CNN. I am beyond any ridiculous conclusion you could possibly jump to.

  30. Rat

    Wendy- republicans replaced by 3 pro-life, pro gun democrats.
    They are dems in name only!
    Gay marriage is still banned in CA. In 61% of Californians voted for the ban
    This is just another example of a liberal, elite, UN-elected judiciary deciding that they know better than, we the voters, how to think about progressive social issues.
    Its amazing how little respect for the constitution and the views of the voters liberals have.
    Neither democrat candidate supports the first or second amendment to the constitution. And the party is led by George soros, and radical environmentalists who would rather we fail as a nation than drill for oil in our own country. Welcome to Orwell’s 1984 courtesy of the democrat congress and legislature.

  31. Sid

    Whores! Whores! Please, stop arguing, all of you!

    The important point is being lost: Portia has become uglier and uglier during her time with Ellen. Anne Heche is also much uglier and has lost all her money. Now, whores, please heed this warning: do NOT lick Ellen’s pussy. We don’t know what the toxins are, exactly, but they make … I dunno … living in New Jersey pale in comparison.

  32. Jrz

    HEY! Dingdong has his own brain! YAY! And that brain is telling him that if you’re tolerant of other people’s choices that have postively no effect on your life that you’re a democrat.

    You need to check the wiring of this alleged brain of yours there bozeac.

    He must have just learned something new in Western Civ. and is eager to share his close-minded opinions with the world.

  33. HottieHottie

    @ 5 Sexy Sadie.

    Uhm, ignoring the whole “all females have their own pussy smell” comment, try being a little spontaneous. All meat tastes better when it’s simmered in it’s sauces a bit. Mine tastes like cherry cola. L – O – L – A Lola…

  34. gay4girls

    @67 Okay, let’s follow your logic, just for the sake of argument. If understanding/manipulating nature counts as “natural,” which I’m willing to concede (kind of like what cells do to process organic/inorganic nutrients), and there is an essential utility to all things natural (e.g. “what good comes out of being gay”) then lets say, from “my logic,” there is a fairly serious “natural” phenomenon of population saturation of humans on the planet. Now, were in nature here so things like adoption and artificial insemination don’t play a direct biological role (as far as causation/adaption is concerned) then wouldn’t non-reproductive sex have a very specific purpose?

    Obviously, my semester is over, I finished grading my student’s papers, and I need to find something to do.

  35. jazzhands

    72- ramalamadingdong your ass outta here. hahaha!! Tune into CNN. You kill me!!

  36. jrz

    Heeth thupeeeweeuh…..heeth goth a bwain.

  37. Dixie #66 is a selfish bitch

    Dixie #66 — You don’t let your boyfriend come inside you? How totally lame. Sure, it’s fun to squirt on the titties once in a while. But nothing is as satisfying for a man as emptying his balls deep inside a hot pussy. Stop being so selfish, Dixie. Your cooter is not as “fresh” as you think it is, anyway.

    P.S. All the conservatives on this site ROCK! Libs are losers. Their idea of fighting against radical Islam is to offer blowjobs to the terrorists in hopes that this might persuade them not to cut their heads off. Soon enough, the libs will be crying like babies, asking the real men in this country to protect them from harm.

  38. LadyJane

    My vagina tastes like dots.

  39. Zanna

    @87 – the good news (?) he has his own brain. The bad news: he got it on ebay.

  40. Lisa

    What I don’t understand is why is one always more male and one always more female? You see it in both men and women gay relationships. Just curious.

  41. gay4girls

    Don’t be a liberal pussy. Punch a republican.

  42. jrz

    I don’t think it was from ebay….that motherfucker got his shit from a Curb Alert on Craig’s List…….

  43. The Kilted Yaksman

    To #67 (Maelstrom):
    Allowing gays to marry opposes all religion? Good. Maybe it’s one more step to climbing out of the fucking dark ages of humanity.
    Anything that opposes the irrational, illogical, infantile, set of slope-browed cave man superstitions you call religion is good in my book.

  44. Mouse

    #81 – of course they were conservative Democrats, that’s the only flavor that can possibly win in those districts. But you missed the point entirely: in those 3 elections, the Republicans trotted out their tried-and-true stuff (gay marriage is ruining the country! Democrats can only have orgasms by surrendering the country to terrorists! Especially gay terrorists!) and tried to tie the Dem candidates to Obama. All 3 times, it didn’t work. The formula is busted. Also, probably the most important part: the candidates privately complained that the RNC was useless in terms of funding, while the RNC said it just aint got much money right now. Better learn to live with a more liberal style of politics.

  45. ApacheRose


  46. jrz

    Is Ramalamadingdong Thai for p0nk?

  47. ramalamadingdong

    i love the way you fucktards (jrz, apache – aka the whore, etc.) all spew your lame ass insults. is it because you have nothing intelligent to say? or no facts to back up your liberal views?

  48. ApacheRose

    I love how you “ramalamadingdong” are so superior that you can’t be bothered to capitalize the first letter in a sentence. So smart… so very, very thmart.

  49. The Kilted Yaksman

    Hey #88, what real men? You mean real war heroes like Bush and Cheney? Or how about the long distinguished military careers of Carl Rove, Bill O’Reilly, and Newt Gingrich?
    Go fuck you sister some more you redneck sack of shit.

  50. jrz

    No, we just don’t need to justify our personal opinions with a jerk off like you. Besides, it’s scads more fun to bust your stones. It’s fun to watch the spittle foam up in the corner of your lopsided mouth. And we like how the veins bulge out of your neck/head thing.

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