Tom Sizemore: ‘Never Listen To Me, I’m On Drugs’

Yesterday, the Internet was regaled by a tale of Bill Clinton banging Elizabeth Hurley as told through the storytelling vessel known as Tom Sizemore. A vessel who’s now under the full weight of two very expensive legal teams and would like to make it clear that he’s a drug addict you should never, ever listen to even if his stories are hilariously plausible. Via Mediaite:

Sizemore appeared on HuffPost Live Wednesday to categorically refute his previous words, attributing them to “the ravings of a drug-addicted actor.”
One of Sizemore’s claims in this supposed audio clip was that he had a very personal moment with Clinton who demanded Hurley’s number. Sizemore made it clear at the outset: “No, it’s not true. I was never at the White House and I’d never met Bill Clinton.”

Of course, the story immediately fell apart once you realize the timeline involved Bill Clinton flying Elizabeth Hurley from England to the White House in under an hour which would require the use of some sort of super-sonic pussy jet. Not that I’m saying Bill Clinton doesn’t have one of those, you just don’t show it to Tom Sizemore unless you want him to call you every five minutes saying he really needs to get to South America fast because he “just started stabbing, man, I’m freaking out.”

Photos: Getty / Pacific Coast News, Splash News