Sean Avery of the Dallas Stars has been suspended indefinitely from the National Hockey League after publicly referring to Elisha Cuthbert as “sloppy seconds.” She’s currently dating Dion Phaneuf of the Calgary Flames. While talking to reporters yesterday, Sean made the following off-hand remarks, according to Us Magazine:
“I am really happy to be back in Calgary, I love Canada,” he said. “I just want to comment on how it’s become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds. I don’t know what that’s about. Enjoy the game tonight.”
After the National Hockey League suspended him for “inappropriate public comments,” Avery — who served as an intern at Vogue this past year — now has to meet with Commissioner Gary Bettman, who will determine any additional penalty.
“I completely support the league’s decision to suspend Sean Avery,” Stars owner Tom Hicks said in a statement. “Had the league not have suspended him, the Dallas Stars would have. This organization will not tolerate such behavior, especially from a member of our hockey team. We hold our team to a higher standard and will continue to do so.”
So, apparently hockey is a gentleman’s sport now? Huh. I must be confused by all the punching and knocking out of teeth. Interesting. If that’s the case, why not make the players wear tuxes and top hats? You know, keep things classy. Then, if your teammate makes unsavory comments about a former lover, you can slap them in the face with your gloves and demand satisfaction. Which is also why everybody gets a pistol. Hear, hear!
Thanks to Ryan who’s been known to seduce a young lady or two with the simple twist of his monocle.
#37 It’s only “awesome” if you’re like, 18, and the reason your ex left you was that you couldn’t get hard unless she dressed up in a ref’s shirt and swatted you on your naked ass with the whistle and told you you needed to spend 5 minutes in her “penalty box”.
Granted, THEN it’s awesome. Ortherwise, no, not so much.
@ #27Lee It was a joke about wiki being faster than a celeb gossip site. You care enough to refer to the comment (when you could just write your own) AND you know the hockey schedule. Double loser.
THIRDS!
Nice fix, Fish.
@3 what is your fucking point? Or did you just learn copy and paste? Good work champ!
Not sure which has more stuffin’ — Elisha or the pink teddy bear. Girl needs to strap on the skates and do some line-to-lines til she pukes.
GOTTA LOVE THE HUGE RANGE IN JUSTICE
in the world of professional sports. You can shoot ‘em up, spit on and smack down a horde of women, plot to kill, and fight dogs and you have a 90% chance of walking right back into the locker room…but NEVER REFER TO A FORMER HO AS SLOPPY SECONDS!!!….NOT IN THE NFL ANYWAY. Can we ever expect reasonable and just decisions by this bunch of yahoooos?
What the fuck is going on here??
NHL bad-ass was an intern at fucking Vogue magazine? Vogue? Really? Gay.
Tom Hicks is a hick.
Let Sean call her the sloppy seconds if he wants to.
He’s a jock! They can treat women anyway they want. What was she expecting? A romantic philosophy major? He throws a ball and grapples other sweaty men.
all i want is lift the skirt and lick her clean till i reach candian border…ummm
She has the look of a girl who tries to make life too pleasant for herself and block out all problems. She is way too soft, both in looks and personality. I get this horribly lazy feeling just seeing her picture. That must be why she likes hockey players, who have the aggression and energy that she lacks.
You can see the trailer park in her future, laying in bed all day with chocolate wrappers strewn around, not bothering to wash because her elephantine husband likes her au naturel, wallowing in last week’s wet spot.
Whatever 52, Stephanie, you know you were attempting a legitimate rant, and were called out for being uninformed.
You know what?
Sean has had MY sloppy seconds, and Cuthbert was one of ‘em.
But you you don’t get paid to play hockey cause your brain is comparable to Einstein’s. Nope not at all. Not very. Nope. Nuthin’ but air. We’re talking gaping chasm. Grand Canyon. Lotsa wind, folks. But Cuthbert, she likes whoevers packing a big package, she’s like the hockey league, she’s not asking for someone with sparkling conversation and elan, nope, she likes it big and hard and pounding, pounding,pounding her pussy ’til it’s pulsating like a breeder reactor about to China Syndrome. Pussy meltdown. I’ve still got scars on my back. Proud of every one of ‘em.
The Superficial Writer may be too gentile for hockey, but there are certain things you dont say. If you a man and not a little bitch like Avery you’ll say it on the ice. Happens all the time and it will be settled on the ice. To trash someone publicly, who dumped you, as “sloppy seconds” is just crass and cowardly. There are no Terrell Owens in hockey and there never will be. Avery is the closest thing to that caliber pussy and he’ll be gone before long. It probably a good thing that he is suspended. He’ll at least live until its over.
About time there’s a story about a real sport that you actually have to be in shape to play unlike football where you can be a huge fat ass and still make a ton of money. That’s probably why their players have so much free time to get themselves in trouble with bringing guns into clubs and having dog fighting rings.
As for Avery, you are one entertaining mofo and you shouldn’t have been suspended. Pretty sure there’s such thing as freedom of speech. Maybe a fine at the most.
The Superficial Writer may be too gentile for hockey, but there are certain things you dont say. If you a man and not a little Vogue intern like Avery you’ll say it on the ice. Happens all the time and it will be settled on the ice. To trash someone publicly, who dumped you, as “sloppy seconds” is just crass and cowardly. There are no gangbaning trash talking media whore Terrell Owens types in hockey and there never will be. Avery is the closest thing to that caliber pussy and he’ll be gone before long by suspension or injury. It probably a good thing that he is suspended. He’ll at least live until its over.
Hey 36 (1moreidiotintheworld) – Nice Slap shot reference…. So many people i bet didn’t get it.
Calling this girl chubby with stout legs is ridiculous!
For those of you that want every girl too look like a 13yr old boy, seriously, go see a shrink there’s deeper issues there.
Go look at the 80s and early 90s when Super Models were hot and had curves compared to these skeletons we call super models now.
One this site and any other… there’s very few of you Males that would pass on this chick if she approached you in person at a Bar, the Internet, etc.
As for Sean Avery. He’s a dirty player, but this comment was VERY amusing.
Whats hilarious is its also a dig on the whole Jarret Stoll (Former Oiler and present Kings player) and Rachel Hunter situation. As Avery also used to bang Rachel Hunter and now Stoll and Hunter and engaged…
She is to the NHL as Alyssa Milano is to the NHL and MLB.
Sincerely
Luc ” the only guy in the NHL to score 500 goals and with Alyssa Milano” Robitaille
little piggy…
I would gladly let her shit in my mouth. RAWR!
Wow, she used to be so hot (Girls next door)..what the hell happened to her?!
I think he may also meant Rachel Hunter. She is with a guy on the Oilers. Stars play them tonight.
there is a term for girls like her…puck-sluts.
oh…right. and fat.
…she looks like miss piggy’s slutty sister.
I always enjoy actually reading the full articles, not just skimming the pictures and titles, but I thoroughly enjoyed this one. Props to the writer, definitely the most comical one I’ve read yet.
MMMMMmmmmmm…….BEEFY!!!!!!!
HAW! I think I hate the Stars a little less now. PS — she’s a little shifty anyway. Wasn’t “Cry Me a River” about her cheating on Justin Timberlake’s friend? Whatever, who cares. Flames suck. What was this post about again?
she is so god damn hot. i dont care if she was sloppy 583,983ths, i would still hit that all day all day. one of the hottest blondes ive ever seen, and what the fuck is she doing dating hockey players? hockey is so gay, fucking canadians, eh?
Go to http://www.inspire.za,org – now! Go quickly!
Hockey might not be any more gentlemanly than other pro sports but they have always insisted on the players wearing dashing suites and comporting themselves like gentlemen off the ice. On the ice they can smack talk, bitch slap and knock each others teeth out. I am sure the Romans demanded the same contrary attitudes in and out of the arena from their ‘Gladiators’.
……..BACK TO SCHOOL?
Nice face she’s got, but each of her asscheeks is bigger than Kardashian’s and JLo’s entire ass. Seriously, hugest ass on the face of the Earth, even look at the main pic, the thunder is roaring out of the bottom of her skirt.
Focus on that face. The bod is absolutely gargantuan.
don’t act like there’s a single one of you guys on here talking shit about her size that wouldn’t cream your pants if she touched your arm
King Edward likes to suck dick.
It so happens I’m an expert of sorts on this particular subject, went out with a gal with an angelic face like ol’ Elisha here, and a similar body-type. There was nothing at all to complain about, I’m just saying it as it is, if anyone wants to remark about Kardashian and her ilk, Cuthbert’s got them all beat in the oversized-rump department.
I don’t know what the deal is, but there’s a type emerging from Canada, chicks with an absolutely perfect face like this, and enormous hips. Maybe it’s a French thing or something. Elisha fits into that category. Watch old 24-shows, the camera is constantly artfully dodging showing her astonishing proportions.
“douchnozzle” HA!*snort*!
when did she go plus size??
“douchnozzle” HA!*snort*!
when did she go plus size??
BTW: to SSDY: “but there’s a type emerging from Canada, chicks with an absolutely perfect face like this, and enormous hips. Maybe it’s a French thing or something.”
“Maybe it’s a French thing?!?”
Ignorant yank.
Are these pictures of Elisha’s mom? I’m confused. Where’s my Girl Next Door?
Honestly as a woman I have to say who gives a shit. This woman is the same one Justin Timbersnake wrote about in what goes around or whatever that shit song is called because she’s a man eater and fucked over his best friend and manager Trace Ayala by cheating on him when they were engaged.
I can’ t believe he got suspended over this, but I guess that’s athletes and sportos you talk smack about their woman and it’s ovah. The same irrational turds that will beat the shit out of a guy for looking at their woman when you were just trying to look at the menu behind her fat head. Maybe she cheated on him and is a giant slut. I’m not saying Avery isn’t a douchebag suprem,e but who the fuck cares I thought athletes always talked smack, but just because it was about some poor defensless wittle woman everyone is all up in arms??? Fuck that. People call their exes worse than that every second, I just don’t see what the big deal is, I could never be a public figure because like most HUMAN BEINGS I sometimes say rude shit that I don’t really mean.
This is assanine, suspend him some of the other shit he’s gotten away with but not this, I bet plenty of athletes are wife beaters behind close doors and verbally berade women every day, but a guy goes out of his way to diss his ex and it’s all inexcusable? Suspend him fine, but indefintely? I don’t get it. I mean that stupid hockey asshole Todd Bertuzzi PARALYZES Steve Moore and still has his career, but Avery calls some stupid chubby Hollywood bitch who has a dating track record that SCREAMS SLUUUUUUUUT sloppy seconds and he may loose his career over it. Ya that’s fucking logical.
On a side note Todd Bertuzzi should be working at starbucks with a hockey stick permently shoved up his ass. An eye for an eye, you end someone’s career yours should end too that guy is a heinous asshole for believing he has the right to continue playing he should pay for that mistake the rest of his life, Steve Moore certainly has to pay for it. The fact that he skates out on that ice with working legs while Moore is confinded to a wheelchair just shows what a selfish disgusting piece of shit he is. I LOATH Bertuzzi.
She looks a little chubby in these pics.
Is that Elisha Cuthbert, her mom, or some random chick with over-bleached blonde hair? She looks like some fat hooker who’s oversexed and under-drugged. Someone give her meth, please. Maybe that will bring back her Girl Next Door body—and then she can pose again in barely there underwear. And the Hockey League would do more than just suspend Avery for calling her a sloppy second. Haha.
Is that Elisha Cuthbert, or her mom, or some random chick with over-bleached blonde hair? She looks like some fat hooker who’s oversexed and under-drugged. Someone give her meth, please. Maybe that will bring back her Girl Next Door body—and then she can pose again in barely there underwear. And the Hockey League would do more than just suspend Avery for calling her a sloppy second. Haha.