Lindsey Vonn Hid In Tiger Woods’ Car For An Hour Because She’s Terrified of Elin Nordegren

The Superficial / March 19, 2013

Yesterday, Tiger Woods and Lindsey Vonn made the odd choice of announcing they’re dating on Facebook, complete with weird, forced Olan Mills couples portraits, which they actually thought would earn them some privacy. Instead, they were photographed at Tiger’s daughter’s baseball game last night where Lindsey sat in the car for an hour because Elin Nordegren was there. Which was a smart move considering we’re talking about a vengeful Swede whose main methods of showing anger are beating your ass with a 9-iron and bulldozing the mansion you raised your kids in because it smells like whore now. Something Lindsey probably should’ve thought about before blasting pics of her new boyfriend all over Facebook. Even better, Tiger’s daughter Sam got in the car later, so nothing like seeing “new mommy” not give a shit about your game. I see that working out for everybody.

*DING DONG*

“Elin, what are you doing here?”
“Our daughter wants to be a stripper because your whore never watched her games.”
“Holy shit. LINDSEY, GET TO THE PANIC ROOM!”
“Foolish mortal. None shall escape MJOLNIR!” *smash, crash, THUNDER*

Photos: Splash News