Dyeing your hair still makes you a drug addict.

Lindsay Lohan dyed her blonde yesterday which I can only assume is some cracked-out scheme to defuse photos of her next to lines of coke.

LINDSAY: So you see, your honor, clearly that’s some random blonde woman skiing down a mountain of cocaine and not me.
JUDGE: Ms. Lohan, I can see your hair right now.
LINDSAY: …. Lindsay’s not here anymore. I’m an otter. Arf-arf! Arf-arf!