Dustin Diamond is still an enormous douche

August 6th, 2009 // 46 Comments

At the unanimous request of cast members, Dustin Diamond was left out of People’s Saved by the Bell reunion issue. One of the reasons was his supposed tell-all book which is finally seeing the light of day after being dropped by a major publisher for being a blatantly false crock of shit. Us Magazine reports:

When it was first announced in July 2008 that Diamond would pen the memoir, publisher Gotham Books promised “sexual escapades among cast members, drug use, and hardcore partying” that occurred throughout the nearly thirteen years he was a part of the hit sitcom franchise.
But, according to The New York Observer, Gotham dropped the 32-year-old star shortly after he turned in his manuscript three months ago. Behind the Bell has since been picked up by a small Montreal-based operation called Transit Publishing.
“This book is freaking incredible!” Diamond’s literary agent, Jarred Weisfeld, has said. “Everyone that reads it loves it, and [it] is truly one of my favorites of all time.”

Yes. Because I’m going to take the word of a literary agent who describes a Saved by the Bell tell-all written by fucking Screech as one of his “favorites of all time.” So let me guess, before this Jarred Weisfeld was editing the backs of cereal boxes. “Hmm, how many E’s should I put in ‘They’re great!’? God. Literature is hard.

Photos: WENN

  1. Gah

    I think I wore that shirt to work at a corporate job in the mid 90s. I am a woman.

  2. Dirk The Impailer

    Straight to the $0.99 rack at Barnes & Noble…

  3. Pimp

    Dustin certainly loves the hookers.

  4. Zee Brat

    Slow new day eh?

  5. Perkin Merkin

    So that is where all of Seth Rogen’s fat went.

  6. Newcastle

    Tera Patrick is WAAAAY TOOO classy to be hanging with this d-bag.

  7. Racer X

    The on the left is Nautica Thorn.

    /I’d hit that

  8. b

    Dustin certainly loves the Crest white strips.

  9. Feckless

    I’m thinking that he and Andy Dick should get married. It’s not like they could have children and it would take them out of circulation.

    Saved by the Bell was on for THIRTEEN YEARS?

  10. What the Duece!

    Who dresses like that?! His jeans are too short, that shirt is hideous and the jacket and boots, Nice combo EEK.

  11. arealcad

    The first thing Tera and Nautica said to Dustin after he dropped his pants was -
    “It looks just like a real penis, only smaller.”

  12. Tera Patrick = instant messy pants

  13. Deacon Jones

    God, Jewish people will stop at nothing to make money….and they’re ugly as fuck

  14. uh Uh UH! Yeah ... hand me a kleenex will you honey?

    Small Montreal-based operation”?? Why, they are HUGE, like my penis. And, like my penis, pink and wrinkly.


  15. Albin Bainbridge

    @ 6

    “Tera Patrick is WAAAAY TOOO classy to be hanging with this d-bag.”

    Tera Patrick lets people shove dongs in her for money and attention.

    So yeah, now that I think about it she’s still too classy for Screech.

  16. Porn Stars have moral values when it comes to posing with dumbfucks like this?? LOL everyone of them would do anything for a dollar if it meant it got them to be noticed for their “performances” rather than their physical fake/altered attributes. I’m not sure as to why Nautica is sucking in gut in the pic..did she just happen to be in a bukkake fest and swallowed everyones mang00 and thought no one would notice?

  17. bakinmycake

    he is really living up to his TV name…..

  18. Jammy

    I think if you’re willing to walk around with a precious metal or gemstone as a name you’re going to start off socially handicapped……
    Jimmy Tin and Betty Granite are doing just fine, however…..

  19. JHo

    Hey I edit the back of cereal boxes! Nomnomnom :P

  20. Sarah

    Is it just me or does he look like Sarah Jessica Parker with facial hair in pic #1?

  21. Yo ho!

    @20 Even SJP makes a better man than this D-bag does.

  22. Amy

    I saw a picture of his penis (from the porn he was peddling a few years back), and it was small and “mushroomy.” Like, the biggest, ugliest mushroom head ever.

  23. Kate

    Dear Superficial –

    Stop making me laugh out loud at work. I think my boss is on to me….


  24. Crabby Old Guy

    “Dustin Diamond is still an enormous douche”. Check
    The sky is still blue. Check
    If you push something hard enough, it will fall over. Check

    Well, that should do it.

    Captain Obvious

    P.S. And TCLTC. Check

  25. Alison

    Holy chin!!! He has Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson beat…

  26. menasor

    nice pair or asian trannies

  27. uh Uh UH! Yeah ... hand me a kleenex will you honey?

    #13 – Didn’t Obama have you racist fucks put to painful death yet? I could have sworn that’s what he meant by ‘yes we can’. It’d be a great employment growth opportunity too.

  28. Anyone else think Tera looks like a hooker version of Olivia Munn?

  29. Automated Response

    Those are not Asian Trannies, those are pornstars.

    Only one does DP. Guess which one.

    And “uh Uh UH! Yeah … hand me a kleenex will you honey?”

    Obama is the reason why Racism has increased in the US.

    He was spouting that crap with Wright and ACORN which are racists in their own right. Somehow some races have forgotten that all racial cultures have hangups, not one in particular.

  30. Ha

    Saw this douche fronting a lame pop-punk band in the 90′s. (It was a free show. NOFX headlined. Shaddap!) There was a booth where Arrowhead was giving out free water bottles. Some giant skinhead pegged Screech right in the forehead with one. Busted him open, he started whining and bailed. I guess he had never been to a punk show before – you probably want to be aware that people throw shit at those *before* you decide you’re gonna be a sweet frontman.

    True story.

  31. uh Uh UH! Yeah ... hand me a kleenex will you Automated Response? And clean yourself up. there's $10

    #29 – Uh huh. blame the victim. Good move. Bet your last “girlfriend” was just asking for it too, walking alone down the street. I’m sure that’ll make a great defense.

  32. WARNING:if you happen to look like Screetch and work in an office, do not ask your female coworkers on a date more than once if you want to keep your job…

  33. LOL @ ANYONE CALLING TERA PATRICK (A PORN STAR) CLASSY. Bahahahaha. P.S. Screech is one fugly man!

  34. nastyjay

    i wish tera rode cock like nautica
    tera’s sexy, but too slow-a-fuck

  35. Dustin Diamond's literary agent

    This book is freaking incredible! It is the new Bible!

  36. Ed Castillo

    is that Fred Durst in the background? That’s pretty sad if the girls are hanging on Screech over him!

  37. Samuel “Shakespeare” Powers!!!

    Can’t Screech afford at least semi-attractive hookers?

    Heh, Dustin’s probably telling the truth anyway. Look at Elizabeth Berkley…er, well, maybe you shouldn’t.

  38. @ 9 – Thirteen years…must be counting “College Years” and “The New Class”, as that assistant. I always thought Screech should have become a Bill Gates billionaire, and Slater could be the gym teacher at Bayside, and Zack could be the janitor there.

  39. Donger

    if i played the biggest nerd ever on tv for 13 years i might turn out as a douche too

  40. Big Nose

    This guy is a leach of the lowest order. Betraying confidences for money. Of course, what would you expect from a scumbag of his order?

  41. Superbiggerevil

    So this is what a turd looks like after you hose it down?

  42. christianbachelors

    Well, at least he’s richer than you or me, hahaha! – sportsdatingsingles.com

  43. Kelly Kapowski

    I think we can all essentially agree that anyone who invites Dustin Diamond to any event that is attended by either the public or anyone taking photos, officially fails at life.

  44. Dude

    Even one of the world’s biggest asshole knows enough to get an equally large piece of shit Jew to get his pack of lies distributed and out into the world!

    because other piece of shit Jews own most of the publishing, along with ALL of hollywood, what’s so hard about that?

    Fucking kikes are the lousiest cocksuckers on the planet! Driven by greed, their olny allegience is to the dollar and other self-serving Christ-killers like themselves, fuck JEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Money lenders since time immortal and greed and corruption personified!

  45. venom

    Typical, annoying, asshole JEW.

  46. I think we all essentially agree that anyone who has any event that either public or attended by any person to take photos, Dustin Diamond officially invited to fail in life Can lives.

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