The Duggars Solved Racism, Oh Good
Thanks to Josh Duggar molesting a quarter of his family before godless liberals get their boots on in the morning – #DuggarStrong – everyone’s favorite gingham circus has pulled themselves up by their bootstraps and turned their attention to YouTube where they’re hoping people will pay them for pure Duggar goodness straight from the tap, or else they’ll be forced to eat each other. But thanks to the creative freedoms of their new platform, the Duggars can finally go deeper than such serious topics as which Jell-O salad does Jesus prefer (ORANGE.) to teaching Christians how to respond to racism. Which according to sperm donor Ben Seewald doesn’t even exist and is a trick of the Devil. Except for when it does exist, and then it’s evolution’s fault. It’s all very cut and dry. Via Raw Story:
“There’s been a lot of, like, tension in America,” Ben Seewald said to Berry, “between, like, blacks and whites, and in the media, too. There’s been all these reports and, like, ‘race war’ and, you know, going on and everything, and these killings and people saying, ‘Hey, we’re trying to start a race war?’ How should we respond to that as Christians?”
Berry pointed to the Gospel of Mark, Chapter 3, verse 25, which says that a house divided against itself cannot stand.
“If you check it out, what they’re trying to do with America,” Berry said, “is to basically have us going against each other while the Devil can sneak in real clearly and destroy what he’s trying to destroy.”
“That’s right, there’s no room for racism in Christianity,” said Seewald. “That all comes from the Devil. That all comes from, like, this false religion out here, evolution, that stuff? Teaching that, like, some people are ‘more evolved?’”
Actually, evolution teaches that everybody evolved, every single human, while religion – Christianity and Islam for the peanut gallery. – teaches that women, gays, slaves, Jews, take your pick are less than. In fact, we had a little thing called the Civil War in this country that was entirely about owning people like property which started way before before evolution was ever taught in public schools, and the book used to justify it sure as shit wasn’t The Origin of Species. In fact, the guy who wrote that book – the one that wasn’t used to justify slavery – was an abolitionist. Then again, I’m using facts, and might as well be waving Harry Potter books and condoms at you. (Blink once if that’s how to defeat you. Twice if I forgot to say Josh’s name backwards.)
Does Tim Tebow know he has a gay little brother? He’s not gonna like that.