Drew Barrymore Is (Probably) Pregnant

Yesterday, TMZ posted pics of Drew Barrymore leaving a doctor’s office holding what is almost definitely a printout from an ultrasound which is fucking terrible news considering Drew Barrymore’s relationships last exactly five minutes and eventually one of those five minutes will involve Dane Cook so now we owe it to this kid to make sure she gets an abortion or never be able to look each other in the eyes ever again. That said, I think we can all agree the more likely scenario is she simply broke into a doctor’s office and stole Reese Witherspoon’s ultrasound results. It just makes the most sense.

Photos: Getty