Doogie Howser heeds my omnipotent advice

April 14th, 2008 // 20 Comments

Neil Patrick Harris realized he’s an idiot and reversed his remarks criticizing stunt casting, such as Britney Spears, appearing on his show How I Met Your Mother. The Doogs finally concluded that “Oh, shit, ratings = work.” I knew there was some boy genius left in there. The AP reports:

“I am just very protective of our show, and its content. I have a high standard of quality, and hope to maintain it on every level. Television is big business, I understand that. I have great faith in our casting department, as well as (Twentieth Century Fox Television) and CBS, to find the appropriate person for every role on our show. I was remiss in speculating otherwise.”

Then echoing my sage-like advice that he shouldn’t talk, which I’m sure he read while flying on Gossamer wings above a bunch of naked dudes, Neil admitted he best shutteth thine yap:

“My job description is to act,” his statement said, “and I should really do just that.”

BOO-YEAH! The Superficial Writer: 1. Doogie Howser: 0.*

*I refuse to acknowledge that open-heart surgery you performed in an overturned bus. Pfft. Anyone can do that. Right, homeless guy I’ve been practicing on? Homeless guy? … So, uh, know any good child-prodigy lawyers? No reason.

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Comments (20)

  1. shanipie | April 14, 2008 at 9:27 am

    First!!

    Reply
  2. shanipie | April 14, 2008 at 9:27 am

    First!!

    Reply
  3. shanipie | April 14, 2008 at 9:27 am

    First!!

    Reply
  4. mac? | April 14, 2008 at 9:27 am

    first?

    Reply
  5. Mo | April 14, 2008 at 9:34 am

    Awww. He has an agent who cares. <3

    Reply
  6. Auntie Kryst | April 14, 2008 at 10:14 am

    I wonder if the image of Les Moonves brandishing a machete in front of Doogie’s dressing room helped change his mind??

    Reply
  7. sportsdvl | April 14, 2008 at 10:17 am

    wow, #1-5 are all ass-wipe losers. Very impressive. We usually just get 1 or 2 douche bags, not 5!

    If Britney would only kill herself during an episode of that show they would have the highest ratings in history!

    Reply
  8. mimi | April 14, 2008 at 10:27 am

    HA HA HA!

    That means Britney will be back!

    Reply
  9. dirt chicken | April 14, 2008 at 10:39 am

    Doogie should stick to butt-phucking.

    Reply
  10. denise | April 14, 2008 at 11:14 am

    LOL. poor nissan driver. cna you imagine? just driving down the road, then BLAMO! britney in your TRUNK! ouch. that’s gotta suck.

    Reply
  11. Tom | April 14, 2008 at 11:51 am

    She is so beautiful!I love her.Maybe many men like her,too.If you want to know her more,you would go to “SeekingRich.com”
    .She is also on “SeekingRich.com”,there are a lot of reports about her.

    Reply
  12. FromOutOfNoWhere | April 14, 2008 at 11:59 am

    Oh man, she is so beautiful in this clip. It’s like watching actors in porn try to act before they start having sex. I was half expecting her to strip down and bang Doowie Hoiser, so the scene would look like it was going somewhere.

    Reply
  13. Beej | April 14, 2008 at 1:02 pm

    Despite the disgusting lifestyle, off-screen shenanigans and dysfunctional family, she seemed well-kept and – dare I say it – GORGEOUS here. I can’t help but feel a generous swelling in me nether region while watching this. Thanks, God!

    Reply
  14. Grunion | April 14, 2008 at 1:20 pm

    Les Moonves is the second greatest name of all time

    “Hi my name’s Steel what’s yours?”

    “Uh, Les …Les Nessman….”

    Reply
  15. LL | April 14, 2008 at 1:48 pm

    Yes, it was awfully dumb of NPH not to realize that he needs to whore right along with everyone else in TV. I mean, Britney = success, right? Everything she touches turns to gold. Wait… Or is it everything she touches turns to Cheetos? Frappuccinos? Fugly hair extensions? Car crashes? Loss of custody of her children? What is it, goddammit? Because “Everything Britney touches turns to gold” just doesn’t sound right, for some reason.

    Britney’s dad must have extremely sickening, incriminating photos of Les Moonves for the head of a very successful network to suck up to a has-been like Britney. Does CBS really need the ratings that bad? They’ve got CSI, Survivor, a couple other things, WTF do they need Britney for? The only reason anyone watched that episode with her in it is they wanted to see if she’d flash her bajingo. Or fall down. Or mumble incoherently. Or all 3.

    What next, Britney on “Numbers,” playing an FBI agent? Britney on “Ghost Whisperer,” playing a ghost? Britney on “Two and a Half Men,” screwing Charlie Sheen? Actually, that last one seems like it would be the ideal role for her. Let’s get the negotiation started on that one, Papa Spears. Your baby’s comeback depends on it. Hollywood Walk of Fame, here she comes!

    Reply
  16. Skeps | April 14, 2008 at 3:54 pm

    “I have a high standard of quality” Really? I mean watching the R-rated trailer for Harold and Kumar 2 kinda suggests the contrary. Maybe he should have said “I have a high standard of quality, when I’m not being treated like a god on-screen”

    Reply
  17. BoboTed | April 14, 2008 at 5:49 pm

    It’s a shame that such fresh commentary is stifled in the entertainment industry. Fuck that crack-whore piece of white trailer trash Britney!

    Reply
  18. RBC | April 14, 2008 at 6:56 pm

    You were right in the first place Doog. And now you caved. You really do have no balls do you?

    Reply
  19. TREE | April 14, 2008 at 8:52 pm

    What a ^%$&$%$ woman!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!The magazine WEALTHY GOSSIP reported her joined the rich woman seeking sugar babies site ”w e a l t h y l o v in g . c o m ” and she is mentioned to find her sugar boy there! the magazine foolx she????????????or fools us???

    Reply
  20. King Wang | April 15, 2008 at 4:13 am

    Jesus Christ, and I don’t mean my local illegal construction worker from Mexico.

    #1- She looks only slightly damaged, mentally of course, she is shot to shit.
    Still bangable, only if she shuts the fuck up. Then it is “hefty bag” time on the old horse-head…….wonder what kind of advice old Doc Phil can give me besides Donkey Punching her.

    #2- That show is what Match Game ’74 was. Something that is always on as a time filler, in-between real shows. Think “Murder She Wrote” and “Dr. Quinn” for references……

    #3- Doogie Howser acting is like me shitting after eating steak and lobster. It goes hand in hand with being painful to watch. Plus, I do believe he is a fag, so that kind of defeats the Brit showing right?

    #4- No article such as this should ever exist. According to the FBI, extraterrestrials are still being classified. That goes for Doogie too……

    Reply

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