Miley Cyrus’ Parents Are Getting Divorced. For Real This Time.

June 14th, 2013 // 24 Comments
Chomp Chomp, Y'all
Miley Cyrus Grill Belly Midriff Myspace Event
I Done Gots Gold In My Mouf! Read More »

Miley Cyrus‘ parents have threatened to get a divorce before – No thanks to Hannah Montana, whoever the hell she is… – only to call the whole thing off, but this time Bret Michaels might want to delouse his finest wig and bandana because Tish Cyrus has officially filed papers. TMZ reports:

Billy Ray’s wife, Tish Cyrus, is citing “irreconcilable differences” in her filing. Her decision to pull the plug on the marriage comes 3 years after Billy Ray filed for divorce but dropped it in an attempt to work things out.
Billy Ray and Tish have been married for 19 years and have 5 children, including, of course, Miley. There’s only one minor child left, Noah Cyrus, who is 13. Tish is asking for full physical and legal custody, with visitation to Billy Ray.

In the meantime, Miley sent the following tweet to Billy Ray Cyrus after the news broke, so you can really tell they’ve strengthened their relationship and maintain open and honest lines of communication: More »

Lindsay Lohan Got To Transfer To The Rehab With The Nicer Jacuzzis

June 14th, 2013 // 16 Comments
Not Without My Adderall
Lindsay Lohan Braless Shopping
Lindsay Can't Do The Drugs She Likes In Rehab Read More »

When we last left Lindsay Lohan, she was freaking out after The Betty Ford Center made her stop taking Adderall. Although, in fairness, when did rehabs start making celebrities quit the drugs they’re hopelessly addicted to? That’s bullshit. Since then, everyone’s been fed a bunch of talking points about how great she’s doing which we didn’t bother repeating because it was only a matter of time before she was released early or got transferred to a nicer rehab with those mojitos she likes. They crush the mint and coke just right. E! News reports:

“She wanted a change,” a source tells E! News of her unexpected rehab move.
The LiLo insider believes the actress’ lawyer Shawn Holley chose Cliffside and that prosecutors, as well as Judge James Dabney, signed off on the transfer.
The source adds it’s unlikely Lindsay will be able to use her ADD drug Adderall at the new treatment center. She is expected to remain at Cliffside until she completes her 90-day court-ordered stint in August.

What’s amazing is that Shawn Holley managed to get the judge to agree to a transfer, yet this is the same lawyer Lindsay fired and replaced with an idiot whose brilliant courtroom maneuvers include, “This here’s my lucky rabbit’s foot,” and “Trust me. Witness tampering’s perfectly legal.” Then again, Lindsay did see him help the Karate Kid beat that murder rap. If only he would’ve kept working with Marisa Tomei…

Photo: AKM-GSI

If Your Child Doesn’t Recognize Robert Downey Jr., You’ve Failed As A Parent

June 14th, 2013 // 10 Comments

Here’s Robert Downey Jr. taking a break from filming The Judge in Massachusetts to meet 18-month-old Jaxson who was under the impression he was going to meet Iron Man, but instead, got this stranger and appears to have reacted exactly like I would’ve so I hope somebody changed him afterwards. On that note, apparently this was the most popular photo on the Internet yesterday even though I gave you whole galleries of Reese Witherspoon‘s butt crack and Kate Upton‘s breast in a bikini. I don’t even know what gets you off anymore, that’s how distant you are lately. Do you want me to make children cry? Will children crying make you look at me the way you used to? WHY CAN’T YOU LET ME IN?!

Photos: Facebook / Getty, Splash News

Eddie Murphy’s Ridiculously Hot Girlfriend Is Still In A Bikini And Other News

June 14th, 2013 // 9 Comments

- The Olsen Twins turned 27 yesterday. Let that sink in. [Lainey Gossip]

- Justin Timberlake‘s nose is a tit. I knew it! [Dlisted]

- Burn Your Bra, It’s For The Greater Good! [theCHIVE]

- Kris Jenner really is this dumb. [Fishwrapper]

- There’s a sequel to 300? Goddammit. [tooFab]

- A bunch of Miss USA winners got naked for PETA. [BuzzFeed]

- Taylor Swift‘s hotness is really starting to haunt me. [Popoholic]

- Here’s 2 Chainz getting robbed at gunpoint in broad daylight. [IDLYITW]

- Kendra Wilkinson knows people can’t see you through the radio. I’m genuinely impressed. [Hollywood Tuna]

- Seriously, what is happening to Denise Richards? [Celebslam]

- Erin Heatherton topless, anyone? [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]

- For the love of God, get Amanda Bynes a thesaurus. [Amy Grindhouse]

- Jack Nicholson had Dane Cook and Maria Menonounos kicked out of a Lakers game. [FilmDrunk]

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We Went To See ‘Man of Steel,’ Here’s Amy Adams’ Boob-Dress

June 14th, 2013 // 23 Comments

So by the time you’re reading this, the lights just dimmed and Photo Boy and I are slowly reaching ours hands towards each other watching Man of Steel which I’ll detail how gently or harshly it treated my nerd-boner later this afternoon. In the meantime, you’ll notice new posts already on the site, and to keep you entertained I’ve included Amy Adams‘ contextually relevant cleavage and two videos after the jump because this post is your substitute teacher now. Don’t make it cry.

Videos After The Jump

The Crap We Missed – Thursday 6.13.13

June 13th, 2013 // 362 Comments

“Then she makes faces like that one she’s doing back there and the writers just start deleting whole pages.”

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed where it seems to be a spiritual kind of day, whether it’s Yeezus delivering his holy flatulence over the unwashed masses so that they may behold and inhale deeply upon it, or Pope Francis himself becoming a Wild Hog. (Insert gay sex reference here.) Also, we witness a miracle performed by Rihanna, who’s apparently taught her vagina to sing.

Or queefing is the new dubstep, I don’t know what the kids are into these days,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN