Just when Donal Logue as Harvey Bullock has me thinking maybe watching Gotham won’t be a horrible idea, here’s Camren Bicondova as a young Catwoman. Yup. “A teenage orphan who is suspicious and wholly unpredictable. She’s a street thief and skilled pickpocket who is dangerous when cornered.” (Did any of that say anything about Anne Hathaway‘s ass in leather? I was covering my eyes.)
Photos: Getty, Pacific Coast News
Here’s Miley Cyrus with dang ol’ dolla bills down her drawers ’cause y’all think she’s one of dem debbil stripper woman flashin’ her hootenanny to every Tom, Dick and Jane. It’s a joke, ya see? Sasfire. Lil’ Mark Twain her pappy used to call her. Or maybe just Mark. Dem Cyruses ain’t exactly right.
Photos: Getty, WENN
Because it’s a silly place, the Internet freaked out over Madonna wearing a remarkably accurate Khaleesi costume for Purim. Turns out it was so accurate because it’s the actual goddamn costume Emilia Clarke wears on Game of Thrones. NY Daily News reports:
“It’s my real costume, because I thought I was dreaming,” Clarke told Jimmy Fallon on “The Tonight Show” on Wednesday night.
“I got an email from amazing HBO publicist Mara, saying, ‘Madonna would like to borrow your costume, is that okay?’
”I thought, ‘God, this must be a dream. This can’t be real,’” said Clarke.
Ironically, it really was a dream which allowed Madonna to obtain the costume for she is not bound by this realm or any other. As for her purpose for the garments? Lowering our defenses so that we might be lured into her hairy armpit of eternal suffering. Welcome to the darkness, little priest.
- Emma Stone is apparently way, way, way too into the Spice Girls. [Lainey Gossip]
- Pamela Anderson thinks she looked like Anderson Cooper now. [Dlisted]
- Bouncing breast GIFs are like little digital Jesuses. With boobs. [theCHIVE]
- Funny Girl Sex Guide: Compliment The Vagina [The Frisky]
- You’d think Taylor Momsen would find it totes edgy that we all saw her tampon string. [Fishwrapper]
- This Is Why Fighting the Anti-Vaccination Crowd Matters [The Daily Banter]
- Good God, Debby Ryan… [Popoholic]
- George R.R. Martin just gave Hollywood a giant coke boner. [FilmDrunk]
- Thor‘s wife hath birthed his double brood of children. [tooFab]
- Katarina Ivanovska‘s in a bikini. [Hollywood Tuna]
- Ashley Greene in spandex, anyone? [Celebslam]
- The creepiest Charlize Theron bikini video you’ll ever see. [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]
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Photos: Splash News
Remember the other day when Scarlett Johansson defended Woody Allen?
Yeah, me neither. *slaps face against monitor* (Hold my calls.)
Photos: Getty, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
After recently developing 35 mm film that was forgotten for almost 20 years in an evidence locker, Seattle police have reopened the investigation into Kurt Cobain‘s death, according to KIRO. Except let me save everybody a whole bunch of time and energy: It was Courtney Love. Courtney Love did it. Why do you think she’s been so helpful lately? “I know. If I find that missing plane, they’ll have to think I’m innocent! Courtney, you genius…”
UPDATE: According to the Seattle Times, there were no new findings and police were merely reexamining old evidence that will be released to the public on April 5 the 20th anniversary of Kurt Cobain’s death. Then again, this could all just be a cover story so Courtney Love doesn’t get spooked which would be impossible because she’s a poltergeist made of heroin and penis tears. Fear is her, and she is fear.
Photos: Fame/Flynet, WENN
At some point between making Illuminati hand symbols and yesterday afternoon Miley Cyrus somehow bruised her ass and naturally had to show everyone on Instagram while wearing a bikini and fingering her vagina. Does not touching her clit every other second open a black hole? Is that why Malaysia Flight 370 simply vanished without a trace? DON LEMON NEEDS ANSWERS.