Dirt

Good Morning, Miss Universe Pageant Swimsuit Runway, And Other News

By: The Superficial / January 16, 2015
- That's Gwyneth Paltrow's camel toe. And it's not even gilded! [Lainey Gossip] - Kim Kardashian's complaining about the fat ass that made her famous again. [Fishwrapper] - The widow of Jennifer Aniston's dead ex is not thrilled with Lady Frippleton. [Dlisted] - There's something called a Blowjob Bib,… More »

Help Me, Claudia Romani’s Butt, You’re My Only Hope

By: The Superficial / January 15, 2015
Alright, folks, I have some great news: Our photo negotiations almost finished, and without giving too much away, I'm no longer alternating between sucking my thumb and drinking in the corner. Because of depression anyway. Which means soon you won't have to watch me do soft shoe at the end of the each day, and… More »

Gwyneth: ‘Men’s Insecurity Depends On How Many Blowjobs You Give Them’

By: The Superficial / January 15, 2015
"Haha! And then I said, 'Well, you're going to be insecure for a while because that's not where that thing goes!' He had sex with mostly groupies after that. It was for the best." Yesterday, Gwyneth Paltrow did an interview with Howard Stern where she said a goddamn slew of… More »

Justin Bieber’s D*ck Is Totes Real, You Guys

By: Photo Boy / January 15, 2015
Posted by Photo Boy Confidence is a tricky game. As a man, when you get called out, sometimes it's best to take the high road and not dignify with a response. Or you could pay a top tier legal team to threaten lawsuits against a tiny blog whose bullshit story wouldn't even make a dent… More »

Joanna Krupa Is Suing Brandi Glanville For Saying Her Vagina Smells

By: The Superficial / January 15, 2015
While the Internet loses it's mind over Dick Poop (Et tu, PEOPLE?), we're going to maintain our integrity and write about smelly vaginas. Over a year ago, Brandi Glanville made comments about Joanna Krupa having a stinky pussy and then apparently did it again just last month… More »

John Travolta Let A Random Guy At The Gym Photograph His Bald Head

By: The Superficial / January 15, 2015
We've seen John Travolta's bald head before. In fact, it made one of our Best Of posts for 2011? Jesus Christ. Anyway, here he is again after introducing himself to this random fellow at 3 a.m. at an empty gym where no one else was working out. Which went awesome if… More »

Liam Neeson: ‘There Are Too Many F*cking Guns In America’

By: Photo Boy / January 15, 2015
"But how will I protect my compound when the gub'mint comes for me?!" Posted by Photo Boy Liam Neeson doesn't have money, but what he does have is a very specia- *gets Batman doll shoved in temple by Fish* - It's cool, man, it's cool. I forgot we weren't doing that anymore... I'll… More »

Micaela Schäfer Doing What Micaela Schäfer Does And Other News

By: The Superficial / January 15, 2015
- Jennifer Aniston's Oscar campaign wasn't as on point as her nipples. [Lainey Gossip] - If Lisa Rinna says Kylie Jenner got her lips done, Kylie Jenner got her lips done. [Fishwrapper] - Rosie Perez is quitting The View already. [Dlisted] - Christian mom thinks her kids' school bu… More »

I Completely Forgot About Abigail Ratchford And That Is A Crime

By: The Superficial / January 14, 2015
Yesterday, we ended the day with what I'm still convinced were naked photos of a prepubescent boy, so for the complete opposite end of that spectrum, here's a bunch of sexy photos from Abigail Ratchford's Instagram which are my creative solution to the ill-timed bikini drought happening… More »

Miley Cyrus’ Brother Is Dating A Schwarzenegger, Too, Now

By: Photo Boy / January 14, 2015
"And now yer sissy can stay over Christmas night'n have squirrel cakes with us in the mornin'!" "Could have just shared whores with dad, but nooo! I'll be different, I thought, but he was right, he was right." Posted by Photo Boy In what has to be scientific evidence that insatiable horniness is a genetic… More »

Justin Bieber Crashed A Log Cabin Republicans Meeting

By: Photo Boy / January 14, 2015
Posted by Photo Boy Before a story involving Justin Bieber mentioned them by name, I had no idea what the hell a Log Cabin Republican was, which yes, is the most depressing thing I've ever admitted about myself. I'm willing to bet, however, that a few of you out there are… More »

Kurt Busch: ‘My Ex-Girlfriend’s An Assassin, So I Had To Hit Her’

By: The Superficial / January 14, 2015
Back in November, NASCAR driver Kurt Busch's now ex-girlfriend Patricia Driscoll accused him of violently beating her after losing a race in Dover and secured a no-contact order from a judge. Via Deadpsin: He was verbally abusive to her and said he wished he had a gun so that he could… More »

I Already Named Khloe Kardashian’s Camel Toe And It’s A Wookiee Wallet

By: The Superficial / January 14, 2015
Yesterday on Instagram, Khloe Kardashian named her camel toe Camille which is some horseshit because I already dubbed it the Wookiee Wallet back in 2010. And, look, I don't play this card often, or ever because most if not all women regardless of age are stronger than me, but… More »

And Now A Dancing, Soaking Wet Chris Hemsworth

By: Photo Boy / January 14, 2015
Posted by Photo Boy We do a lot for the fellas around here, straight questionably sexual predatory fellas in particular, so every now and then we like to toss you ladies and gay gents a bone (pun completely intended). That said, I'll save my efforts at comedy, much like Jimmy… More »

Naya Rivera: ‘Showering Every Day Is A White People Thing’

By: The Superficial / January 14, 2015
In what will undoubtedly be one of the crowning and most influential discussions on race relations of our time, Naya Rivera went on The View yesterday and basically went, "White people be all like, 'I'mma shower every day.' But brothas be like, 'Shit, I'll just take one every three days.'" So… More »

Chris Brown Is Done With ‘N*gga Parties’

By: Photo Boy / January 14, 2015
"Damn, son. Just Googled these Chinese letters and this shit spells 'Fake Thug Dance Like Girl' over and over." Posted by Photo Boy Things aren't going great for Chris Brown. He can't play his beloved "nigga parties" anymore, because people keep getting shot at them, his girlfriend dumped him,… More »

Good Morning, Kennedy Summers, And Other News

By: The Superficial / January 14, 2015
- Jennifer Lopez will pretend to bang the dude from her new movie now. [Lainey Gossip] - Renee Zellweger is squinting again! Hurray? [Fishwrapper] - Billy Bob Thornton really wants to have sex with Jennifer Aniston. [Dlisted] - "American Sniper" Chris Kyle was proven repeatedly full of shit, but… More »

Miley Cyrus Is Naked Again

By: The Superficial / January 13, 2015
In a photo shoot that looks like something Chris Hansen would Falcon Punch out of a scout leader's safe, here's Miley Cyrus posing nude for V Magazine and reminding me I need to update that Justin Bieber post with the fake Photoshops. As for why… More »

No, There Are Definitely Terrorists In There, Keep Checking

By: The Superficial / January 13, 2015
You're probably wondering why you're staring at Kim Kardashian's ass and not a bikini model shilling bottled water, and that's because there haven't been any yet this week. Which is terrifying because I'm almost positive that means one of them floated out to sea, and hopefully not one of… More »

Here’s How Bill Cosby And His Fans Responded To Protesters

By: The Superficial / January 13, 2015
Two days before Tina Fey and Amy Poehler officially made Bill Cosby an award show punchline, roughly 30 female protesters stood up in the middle of his standup performance in Ontario and started chanting, "We believe the women! We believe the women!" before being ushered out by security. But before that… More »

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