Did Somebody Clean? This Place Looks Different….

June 10th, 2010 // 145 Comments

Welcome to the new The Superficial!

This is the reason I’ve been cutting out early this week and not because of my debilitating drinking problem. (Entirely.) I’d like to be like Kim Kardashian and take credit for everything that happened here, but I’ve never been urinated on, so huge thanks to Ron, Adam and Greg who practically killed themselves to make my dick jokes look pretty. Apparently you can do things with computers besides ogle tits. I had no idea.

So What’s New?

- The site received a much needed Brazilian wax while still maintaining all those classic curves you said you loved even though you were visiting other sites. (Cheater.) She also moves faster which means you can be twice as unproductive at work. You’re welcome, American economy!

- The picture galleries are improved in ways that still let you see nipples. I don’t see any point in elaborating further.

- Commenting is an all new sexy beast. You can create your own profile, see what posts you’ve left comments on AND directly reply to other comments. No more typing “@25 why don’t you shut the fuck up, darkie.” Haha! You kids and your anonymous racism.

- Oh, and less Spam. But don’t worry, you can always ask me where to find cheap boner pills and I promise not to laugh at you for more than five minutes. — Make it 10.

- Improved Bikini gallery. I probably should’ve made that the front page of the site, but journalistic integrity was never my strong suit.

- A new “Dirt” category which cuts right to the gossip without having to sift through bikini pics. I hope the three of you that applies to have a blast.

That about covers it. In the meantime, apologies in advance for any bugs or hiccups as we slowly roofie this baby into unconscious submission. (I really need to pick better metaphors.) Look for new little tweaks and polishes to appear over time, particularly something an annoying amount of you has asked for: A mobile version of The Superficial. All those friends and neighbors you’re going to stab for a new iPhone 4 won’t die in vain. Unless you get the white one. No one likes the white one.

You may now comment on how gay everything looks,

- The Superficial

Kelly Brook in a Bikini Getting Motorboated by Riley Steele in a Bikini – 6.9.2009


  1. BC

    Normally I hate change, but I kinda like it. You have my support for now.

    We need some nipslips to really test the functionality tho’.

  2. Zoi

    “you can be twice as unproductive at work. ”

    yeiii!!that’s exactly what i’m doing!

  3. iO caRiño

    tás a ver sara!

  4. i swear i saw a beta test of a new layout but it was bright pink

  5. Rimba

    Looks fucking great!

  6. Cellphone

    Holy shit! This must be one of the most modern Hollywood bitches site now! congrats!

  7. Cellphone

    Great! Even tho i’d still have to figure out the 2010 technologic updates!

  8. James

    What? You didn’t get rid of the stupid red stars? What’s the point?

  9. Mr. Muckle

    Why make me click again to read the jokes? It’ll boost your page views, but it’s damned annoying.

  10. Top chick on the old site was better. Just sayin. NEVAR FORGET!

  11. o yah, and bring back the forums.

  12. yeahh
    members of the superficial!

  13. tenthirteen

    What happend to the blondie? The new one seems a shemale! please!!!!

  14. What happend to the blondie? The new one seems to be a shemale! please!

  15. Racer X


  16. Tony

    How do you get rid of the stars now? Would somebody be kind enough to enlighten me. Thanks in advance!!

  17. Deacon Jones

    Not bad FISH, but one request. It’s simple.

    Bring back the numbered responses. I dont have tim ein my productive work week to scroll down an entire column to see if someone told me to fuck off or not.

    If someone replies to, sayyy, post #46, renumber the replies under that post as 46.1, 46.2, etc.

  18. Cat

    Oh, I thoroughly enjoy you.

  19. lickz

    Love the new site, but HAAAAATE the ‘More’ button.
    It’s annoying! Why can’t you just put the whole story on the page?

  20. buns

    dude, i cant see nipples anymore:(

  21. Yeah thanks for nothing!! A better functioning website with more nekkid Breastatiss…great exactly what we needed to sure fire find ourselves in the unemployment line. However I really think the Boobs should have their own category. I mean since when does bikini’s trump areola’s??

  22. Awesome work! Bring on the boobies!

  23. Huh

    The movies and geeks links don’t seem to work on my MAC using Firefox 3.6.3

  24. alex

    I’m just impressed you didn’t say, “This is our kickass new site, as reported by TMZ….”

    Just fucking with you, the site is very nice…having a celebratory busta-nut-bar in your honor.

  25. well, I’ll be damned. 6 years of reading this site and now I can actually start talking to people like this is Facebook or something!? Living in the Future is weird.

  26. havoc


    No seriously, I like it.

    Upskirt 2.0!


  27. Bob

    Pictures no longer show up in Google Reader. Kindly fix this?

  28. i fucking love the new fucking page!

  29. I dunno if it’s related to the new format, but I’m seeing about zero spam comments on this thread, which by itself is a HUGE improvement! Long live Le Fish!!!

  30. It was time the Superficial got a facelift. It looks great!

  31. Mia

    Love the new site, but could it be possible to have the whole post in one page, as you did for this one? pleeeeeeease :)))))

  32. beep

    Clicking the “More” link sucks. Get rid of it.

  33. The instrument has yet to be invented that can measure the gayness of the new site.

    But I like it.


  34. OJ's Mom

    I have been a Fish fan for years, and this site looks much better now. Thanks Fish. Good shit.

    Free OJ.

  35. I was kinda shocked at first but I’ll get over it. I’m already liking it.

  36. gui

    LOVES IT! Great job!

  37. I have to say, the new layout is pretty sexy.

  38. The new site looks good! And being able to create an account was a great idea. Good job, Superficial.

  39. Dude

    Would really like you guys to return to the old header image.

    Everything else looks great though.

  40. Emu

    This goes without saying, but I’m gonna say it anyway. You are hilarious. Yeah, new layout is cool and all, but my god- roofieing the site into unconscious submission? Amazing. Though I think GHB is more potent and less easily detected :D
    Anyway, thanks for being awesome.

  41. Bring back the blondieeee! and lets see some non stary boobs!

  42. Pretty alright layout. Not digging the “Read More” links. It should definitely be all on one page. Make life easier. I also for some reason had a hard time finding this comment link, which I thought was kind of stupid. Other than that I wouldn’t say it’s too bad.

  43. jaime

    god, the site looks gayer than ever

    congratulations on your plastic surgery SW!

  44. jaime

    what’s with the double timestamps?
    ” 2010-06-10 18:29:39 at 6:29 pm”

  45. Biv

    Like the new, sexy, faster Superficial.
    Did I mention FASTER.
    Now if we can just avoid pop ups…

  46. Loving the new site.

  47. It was ABOUT time Superfish.
    You should have done this years ago, but I forgive you xoxo.

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