Denise Richards will do anything short of ‘pure porn’ for money

Denise Richards is painfully aware her acting career is about to be put out of its misery. As a mother (“Have you seen my kids? Look at my kids. LOOK AT THEM!”) she’s panicking over what to do about her cash flow once E! cans her reality show Denise Richards: It’s Complicated. But, in a classy move, she’s ready to do anything to make that paper. Well, almost anything. The Chicago Sun-Times report:

Supposedly, Richards is so concerned about her professional future, ”she’s willing to do just about anything and take any role that’s not pure porn,” says a longtime pal. Besides her dismal reality show, Richards’ recent film projects have been clearly forgettable little comedies yet to find distribution.
“[Ex-husband] Charlie Sheen is clearly loving all this,” said one of the sources, who quipped, ”I expect we’ll soon see Denise as a future victim in the umpteenth ‘Saw’ sequel.”

So, hypothetically, if I used my cell phone to record Denise and I making passionate love on my couch and called it “independent cinema,” she’d be open to the role? Good, good. Then, I guess, have her people call my people and we’ll draft up a salary which I should mention is zero. Here’s the rub: My entire operating budget (Read: sandwich.) is going to the homeless guy working the phone. I’m sure Denise will understand; She’s an artist.*

*Entire film career excluded during the formation of this statement.

Photos: WENN