Demi Moore Is Still Wearing Her Wedding Ring, Also Dying
A walking skeleton claiming to be Demi Moore attended the premiere of Margin Call last night where it still wore its wedding band suggesting it hasn’t shunned Ashton Kutcher from its bony loins. It also had on a Kabbalah bracelet, imbued with magic powers. In fact, just looking at it caused me to want just one vagina for the rest of my life, and I’m almost positive I flew earlier. Or tripped over the cat, but I’m sure it was that flying stuff.