deadmau5 Isn’t Mentoring Paris Hilton

Yesterday, TMZ reported that Paris Hilton wants to be a house DJ now and is under the tutelage of deadmau5 who might produce her next album. Well, deadmau5 caught wind of this, more than likely from fans on Twitter saying, “WTF?!” so here he is on Facebook setting the record straight:

HEY WORLD… im not teaching Paris Hilton how to DJ. fuck already! she showed up to a show, and shit, ill be friendly to just about anyone who isnt a fuckin asshole. and she was respectful and polite, and all around nice to chat with, so i let her be a ghost… how the fuck does it end up all “im producing her next album” or “teaching her to be a DJ” if she wants to do whatever she wants, let er! i dont give a fuck… but why am i involved all of a sudden?

And welcome to the exact moment deadmau5 learned that everything Paris Hilton touches get infected with an incurable taint that never comes off, although you can control the number of flare-ups by talking to a doctor. Which is why I recommend DJs carry guns now. They’ll offer the protection you need with basically the push of one button, so, man, talk about blending seamlessly into your day-to-day. Amirite?

Photos: Getty