A Dead Mobster Says Tom Cruise Isn’t Gay

Now that everyone knows that Katie Holmes is all over Jamie Foxx’s D, the “is Tom Cruise gay?” debate has reared its faaabulous head again. According to a posthumously released autobiography from mobster Johnny Fratto, who supposedly coached Cruise on the art of being a badda-bing-badda-boom Paisan in The Color of Money, he saw Tom Cruise touch some girls on the shoulder at a nightclub in the 80’s. In Fratto’s eyes, there’s no way he could be a homosexual.

In the book, Fratto describes how Cruise entered the Faces nightclub in Chicago one night and put his arms around “two smoking hot party girls from Des Moines.”

“‘What’s going on, ladies?’ he asked with that mischievous superstar smile that made that f - - ker millions of dollars . . . I had never seen women actually swoon in real life . . . these bitches swooned.”

“If there was anything gay about Tom Cruise, I sure as f - - k didn’t see it, and neither did the girls from Des Moines,” Fratto said. (from PageSix)

It should be noted that this was in 1985, way before he became Scientology’s #1 galactic bishop and people saw him as the young kid in Risky Business and The Outsiders so literally EVERYONE wanted to bang him. Also… Des Moines??? Am I missing some piece of cultural history that says that women from Des Moines, Iowa were the crème da la crème in the mid 80’s? I know Fratto’s family is deeply rooted in Iowa – his father ran the Iowa mob during the Capone days and one of his brothers may or may not have murdered Rocky Marciano.

… But I’ve met folks from Iowa, even driven through Des Moines once or twice, and I left with the impression that everyone there was actually trying to look like Tom Arnold.

Maybe I need to go pickup this guy’s autobiography and find out if there’s more to this story. Perhaps this Tom Cruise segment continues by going into detail about how Tom Cruise did the most hetero thing ever by bringing this Italian guy into a private room while he did hetero sex with these two chicks from Iowa who probably looked like dudes who pad their butt cheeks