David Letterman harasses the mentally insane

December 21st, 2005 // 22 Comments

dletterman_restraining.jpgDavid Letterman is trying to get his lawyers to remove a restraining order made against him by a Santa Fe woman who claims “the CBS late-night host used code words to show he wanted to marry her and train her as his co-host.”

A state judge granted a temporary restraining order to Colleen Nestler, who alleged in a request filed last Thursday that Letterman has forced her to go bankrupt and caused her “mental cruelty” and “sleep deprivation” since May 1994.

Nestler’s application for a restraining order was accompanied by a six-page typed letter in which she said Letterman used code words, gestures and “eye expressions” to convey his desires for her.

She wrote that she began sending Letterman “thoughts of love” after his “Late Show” began in 1993, and that he responded in code words and gestures, asking her to come East.

She said he asked her to be his wife during a televised “teaser” for his show by saying, “Marry me, Oprah.” Her letter said Oprah was the first of many code names for her and that the coded vocabulary increased and changed with time.

I don’t know what it takes to become a judge in Santa Fe, but apparently a brain isn’t one of the requirements. There’s no other explanation for how the restraining got approved in the first place, since the odds of David Letterman sending secret coded messages to an insane woman in Santa Fe are about as likely as me not having sex tonight with a half dozen supermodels. In other words, not very.

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Comments (22)

  1. HypCakes | December 21, 2005 at 8:35 pm

    It’s interesting that this never happens to Leno or Conan. Letterman is superior in the delusional fan department.

    Reply
  2. Shauna | December 21, 2005 at 8:49 pm

    I can get where she would think that. For example, that pic that is shown with the story is obviously an open offer of oral sex to miss Nestler. Dave should be ashamed of himself.

    Reply
  3. Leslie | December 21, 2005 at 9:12 pm

    HAHAHAH.

    That’s really all I have to say.

    Reply
  4. T-Bag | December 21, 2005 at 9:14 pm

    See this is exactly why I skip the asian hand games offered up in salt lake this time of year

    Reply
  5. LaLindsey | December 21, 2005 at 11:25 pm

    Actually, the judge has a brain. And a legal reason for approving the restraining order.

    All restraining orders are approved temporarily until the case is investigated and proven to be legitimate or not. No matter how mentally unstable the issuer may seem, or how outrageous the accusations.

    Reply
  6. conceitedhipster | December 21, 2005 at 11:29 pm

    “It’s interesting that this never happens to Leno or Conan. Letterman is superior in the delusional fan department.”

    HypCakes, Letterman is far superior in every department.

    Reply
  7. ebayfan414 | December 21, 2005 at 11:32 pm

    Listen to this woman! She is telling the truth! I mean, I have been trying to convince people for YEARS that Lindsay Lohan has been sending me secret love messages with her boobs. She jiggles them in morse code to try and profess her love to me in secret. ‘Mean Girls’ was actually essentialy a secret message to me saying, “Look at my boobs! They are round!”

    Reply
  8. Anh | December 22, 2005 at 12:30 am

    Gotta love our government and its offices… A restaining order of a 100 yards. This chick is in California and Dave in New York…

    Reply
  9. hugo | December 22, 2005 at 12:43 am

    this one of the most hilarious stories i’ve seen here. the poor lady that loves david must be crazy and the judge… a little dumb.

    Reply
  10. Lynette Carrington | December 22, 2005 at 2:17 am

    Not sure if you all remember what happened to the last crazy Dave fan….you know, the one who kept breaking in to his house. She killed herself, thus saving thousands in taxpayers’ money; not to mention time saved in courts. Maybe this new crazy will follow suit.

    Reply
  11. HypCakes | December 22, 2005 at 2:18 am

    “HypCakes, Letterman is far superior in every department.”

    True, conceitedhipster. True, true. Truch

    Reply
  12. garamond | December 22, 2005 at 4:44 am

    When will he start harassing the physically insane?

    Reply
  13. hafaball | December 22, 2005 at 9:51 am

    The only really funny thing about this is it caused her sleep deprivation. It;s called Late Night with David Letterman…lol, oh well, other than that it;s kind of sad. XD

    Reply
  14. Videomaster | December 22, 2005 at 10:32 am

    Could it be a case of “ok, crazy biatch, here’s your order, get the hell of out my court”? It’s a harmless court decision, free publicity and lots of food for Letterman’s joke writers.

    Reply
  15. Smackage | December 22, 2005 at 12:11 pm

    this gives me hope….that i can become a judge in santa fe

    Reply
  16. Binky | December 22, 2005 at 12:22 pm

    Anyone who watches the show can tell the signals are actually going out to Alan Caulder and Biff Henderson.

    Reply
  17. Star4456 | December 22, 2005 at 1:38 pm

    This woman is a classic example of a woman with delusional disorder displaying characteristic erotomatic subtype features. It sounds as though this woman actually is clinically insane. Maybe a restraining order is necessary. Yikes.

    Reply
  18. ThatsHot | December 22, 2005 at 2:47 pm

    Star4456, are you a psych student? You just totally analysed that woman. My turn now! Do me! I love warm hugs, hard beatings, and stern warinings coupled with asphyxiation and the occasional bubblebath with my rubber ducky. What’s wrong with me? Oh yeah, that lady’s out of her gourd. She probably thought he’d make a big to-do and it’d go to trial and THEN she’d finally get to meet him and woo him with her feminine wiles. Fuckin moron.

    Reply
  19. Nay | December 22, 2005 at 8:38 pm

    I sorta feel sorry for her. She obviously has issues and you’d think David would just ignore this whole nonesense and not feed it by getting his lawyers involved. She’s in frikin New Mexico and you’re in New York Dave…thats more than three yards just in case you were too busy obsessing about Oprah to learn to count.

    When is his contract up anyway?? Oh thats mean.

    Reply
  20. HollyJ | December 22, 2005 at 11:50 pm

    I think this article is sending secret, coded messages of mishagas to me. =0

    Reply
  21. funkygoldmedallions | December 23, 2005 at 2:14 pm

    TRO’s are not automatic, LaLindsey. Typically, an offer of proof establishing a legitimate need for the protective order (genuine fear of bodily harm) must be shown. On its face, this woman’s claims are insane and should have been rejected.

    Reply
  22. seraphym | December 29, 2005 at 10:25 am

    catatonic schizophrenia anyone?

    Reply

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