David Hernandez, a Top 24 contest on American Idol, has a secret nude past. Turns out he was a male stripper which may put his Idol future in jeopardy, according to the AP:
The 24-year-old finalist from Glendale, Ariz., once worked as a stripper at Dick’s Cabaret, appearing fully nude and performing lap dances for the club’s “mostly male” clientele, club manager Gordy Bryan said Monday.
“He had the look and the type that people like, so he made pretty good money here,” Bryan said.
Dick’s Cabaret? Wow, what an amazingly subtle name. You might as well call it Penis Bar. Wait, that’s perfect. Jesus, it’s practically fool-proof. Somebody front me a ton of cash to open a male strip club. I can’t promise I won’t embezzle the funds, drink all the liquor profits and “accidentally” stock it with female strippers. So, really, you can’t lose.
Ted from LA | March 4, 2008 at 11:01 am
I’m shocked.
Beautiful Deaf Girl | March 4, 2008 at 11:03 am
He’s a dog. Why would anyone, male or female, want him to strip for them. He is even going to be uglier when he grows up.
meh | March 4, 2008 at 11:04 am
My theory that all male contestants on this show are gay seems to be pretty right on. I win! WOOHOO!
K | March 4, 2008 at 11:04 am
3RD
Onoodle | March 4, 2008 at 11:06 am
I saw his profile on millionaire&celeb site millionairefriends.com last week. Is he single now? Just curious.
Pixie | March 4, 2008 at 11:07 am
His face looks too sweet and boyish for a stripper, the visuals alone make me feel like a sex offender.
mercedes von uppity | March 4, 2008 at 11:13 am
There’s a local joint where I live called “Home Erectus”. Talk about subtle!
Sambo the Ass Pirate | March 4, 2008 at 11:16 am
faggots on American Idol? color me shocked!
Danny Noriega | March 4, 2008 at 11:17 am
I just knew that David was a pole smoker. Now he can smoke my pole.
mimi | March 4, 2008 at 11:17 am
HEY FISH-ASS…
Why don’t you rip this guy a new asshole like you do to all the WOMEN you scewer you low life female hating bastrd?
FRIST!!! | March 4, 2008 at 11:20 am
I for one am OUTRAGED that your PAST can put your American Idol FUTURE in jeopardy!!!!!!!
I’m also outraged that for a full minute I couldn’t remember how to spell jeopardy, and had to scroll back up to the post..
RichPort | March 4, 2008 at 11:20 am
I’d call him a pussy, but that would be a misnomer at best.
The Veggi Whore | March 4, 2008 at 11:22 am
there is NO such thing as a sexy male stripper. I wish to hellfire that there were…… but they are ALL gay and wear those intolerable florescent or animal print thongs..
Not that I’ve been to one ;)
absolute2 | March 4, 2008 at 11:24 am
He is a cuttie. I saw him on “W e a l t h y R o m a n c e. c o m” last week. Is he single now? Just curious.
RichPort | March 4, 2008 at 11:25 am
#10 – It’s called splel chekc. Use it.
mimi | March 4, 2008 at 11:38 am
# 15 – It’s called leaving out an “A” you sshole.
Auntie Kryst | March 4, 2008 at 11:40 am
I thought all fuck ups on American Idol eventually wind up working at strip clubs after their careers fail, not start at one.
Spell Checker | March 4, 2008 at 11:42 am
“scewer”?
mike | March 4, 2008 at 11:44 am
Hey VeggiWhore, I am straight and a sexy male stripper.. My thong is just blue. Do you want me to come dance for you??
RichPort | March 4, 2008 at 11:57 am
Hey mimi, I pologize for h ving insulted your intelligence. Ple se don’t “scewer” me. M ny th nks.
D. Richards (Slob.) | March 4, 2008 at 12:01 pm
The ‘finishing’ move in david’s act involved a lucky male patron, a quart of petroleum lubricant, and one large hen’s egg.
Jimbo | March 4, 2008 at 12:01 pm
For once I can’t write anything harsh. I stripped once, mostly for guys, because I needed money for school. So it’d be the pot calling the kettle black. Granted, it was for lunch money and I was in the 4th grade and the audience was mostly relatives, but still, I think I know how David feels.
23rd | March 4, 2008 at 12:02 pm
23rd
Zanna | March 4, 2008 at 12:15 pm
His head looks like something you’d scrape your shit covered shoes on.
http://www.yardlover.com/products.php?pid=77714759
see? It’s funny because it’s true.
Elexis | March 4, 2008 at 12:29 pm
His name was Caiden. And he wasn’t gay, he slept with a lot of chicks that he met there. I’m surprised no one said anything sooner.
havoc | March 4, 2008 at 12:30 pm
Yeah, he does look like a pillow biter……
.
commish | March 4, 2008 at 12:32 pm
#25
I was just about to say that . . . . . .
commish | March 4, 2008 at 12:33 pm
Zanna-
Or shit covered dick . . . . oh, yes I d’ id.
D. Richards (Surgeon.) | March 4, 2008 at 12:41 pm
#25 — ‘Elexis?’ You’re not fooling me, ya’ tranny.
RichPort | March 4, 2008 at 12:47 pm
#24 – He’s a full service station… he uses his scrubberhead to clean the salad before he tosses it.
#25 – Dressing like chicks don’t make ‘em chicks…
RoRo | March 4, 2008 at 12:51 pm
go on: http://www.rowanrose.blogspot.com
Real life, real people.
RichPort | March 4, 2008 at 1:03 pm
#31 – Go on: http://www.xanga.com\bollocksburgcastle.
Real life, real people… just not real boring.
p0nk | March 4, 2008 at 1:11 pm
Never thought I’d see the day. #32′s comment shills for a disguised-purpose site just like all the other spammers.
RichPort | March 4, 2008 at 1:19 pm
#33 – Hi p0nk! It was a take on the comment above it. J-O-K-E. Nice to see you’re doing well and remain unbitter. Have a great day.
Zanna | March 4, 2008 at 1:55 pm
@ 33 Disguised porpoise? Why do you always have to bring up Wally????
bongo the smiling stoned dog | March 4, 2008 at 2:04 pm
why so bitter, He-Man?
iHATEDemo-Commies | March 4, 2008 at 2:09 pm
Hehhe, never saw that coming. Total FAG.
RichPort | March 4, 2008 at 2:10 pm
Let’s name the myriad things that are bitter… coffee grains… chinese melon… drink mix aditives… brocolli rabe… I’m drawing a blank on the rest… anyone?
jrz | March 4, 2008 at 2:10 pm
FAEG!
LadyJane | March 4, 2008 at 2:10 pm
Hahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
TSFSRT Bongo.
That Weird Little Son of a Bitch from the Convenience Store | March 4, 2008 at 2:14 pm
other things that are bitter? When I worked on a farm we used to pick cranberries and cranberries are awful. They add a ton of sugar to them to make juice, and even the juice is bitter. Well, they’re more sour. Okay, then I guess I don’t know anything else that is bitter. Except for narcissists…they can be bitter. Or maybe embittered.
That Weird Little Son of a Bitch from the Convenience Store | March 4, 2008 at 2:14 pm
other things that are bitter? When I worked on a farm we used to pick cranberries and cranberries are awful. They add a ton of sugar to them to make juice, and even the juice is bitter. Well, they’re more sour. Okay, then I guess I don’t know anything else that is bitter. Except for narcissists…they can be bitter. Or maybe embittered.
10lb15oz | March 4, 2008 at 2:16 pm
You’d think he’d taste like marshmallows, not bitters.
TWLSOBFTCS | March 4, 2008 at 2:16 pm
chagrin! double post.
bongo the smiling stoned dog | March 4, 2008 at 2:18 pm
You guys better stop or else he’ll think it’s all about him again.
Happy_Possum_Smith | March 4, 2008 at 2:20 pm
This thread now reeks of the emotional rantings of human hubris, hauntingly helped by hapless hoardes of haughty hotheads. pZEROnk, I miss pooping in your breakfast cereal. I also miss playing “find that neck” while you sleep.
Don’t judge me.
ponk is a fucking moron | March 4, 2008 at 2:23 pm
stop! you’ll make He-Man mad.
LadyJane | March 4, 2008 at 2:26 pm
WTF????
jrz | March 4, 2008 at 2:27 pm
Jeeze Louise, #47, don’t be coy, tell us how you really feel about p0nk? Good lord……….
10lbs15oz | March 4, 2008 at 2:29 pm
Did you ever see a snake swallow a baby pig?