David Beckham holding a giant rope in his underwear

June 11th, 2009 // 65 Comments

David Beckham unveiled his new Armani ad on Oxford St. in London this morning, and I’d probably be enticed to buy these briefs if I was part of the target demographic. Sadly, for Armani, I’m not a gay sailor on the S.S. Ropecock.

Photos: Getty, Pacific Coast News, WENN

  1. ropeburn

    rope burn!!!!!!!!!!!!1

  2. Derp!

    Derp! I can’t see his boobs – Gay boner!

  3. Laura


  4. Cris

    This is just ridiculous….

  5. Erica

    He is repulsive. And has the voice of a 14 year-old boy.

  6. Nice fucking Howdy Doody do…

  7. alex

    He’s not attractive. At all.

  8. Andie

    He’s got a real nice body, but he just seems like such a douche bag. To me, anyway. If I could find a ‘real’ (read: not a douche, somebody that doesn’t use more hair gel and body oil than I do) man with a body like that I’d club him over the head and take him back to my cave. Rawr. And the bastard would be lucky to be there. Hmph.

  9. You can cater to the female audience all you want fish, but ill say the fishfems come to see how disgusting the comments from the guy can get and also to compare and contrast body parts with celebs…

  10. Jumpy McDougal

    Silly, he is NOT holding a rope in his underwear. It is clearly outside of his underwear.

  11. Duh

    #10 – I don’t think he meant that he is holding the rope in his underwear. I think he means that he is in his underwear while holding the rope….it’s all in the wording.

  12. Bobaloo

    Exactly, 10. I see no rope in his underwear. Maybe a piece of string, but no rope.

  13. Stuey

    Wrong, fish means that he has a giant rope in his underwear. You assume it is the literal rope but he was making a comment with word play about his package.

  14. AW75

    Artistic Director: GAY
    Stylist (stylist??): GAY
    Hair stylist: UBER GAY
    = David Beckman in his underwear with a greasy hairdo holding a big fat rope.

    9#: Catering to the female audience? Dude, he is selling underwear for guys!!

  15. e-rock

    THANK YOU FISH!!!!! Finally somethin for the ladies, and the gay men!!!! More for the gay men, cuz what the hell is with the hair? Yikes!!! bad, bad hair, but oooooo my goodness, I could hop on that train and ride it till the sun cummmmssss up!!!! yeeehaw!!!

  16. lulu

    HE IS FUCKING HOT AS HELL! Victoria you lucky biotch!!

  17. lulu

    HE IS F*CKING HOT AS HELL! Victoria you lucky biotch!!

  18. KV

    This is HOT. If he was a mute, that would be even hotter.

  19. hahaha!

    it never ceases to amaze me how fragile men are. one million posts on here of giant fake breasts, bikinis, yada yada. one pic of becks in his underoos and suddenly the gay jokes go flying to protect your oh-so-fragile and amazingly hypocritical self-esteem. even you, superficial writer.
    this guy is blazing hot and your girlfriend totally thinks so.

  20. ion

    That last line almost cost me a keyboard. Still laughing. I love you, Superfish.

  21. Raven

    Looks like they overdid his hair transplant. I see his new and improved hairline based on that pic now starts in the middle of the forehead.


  22. havoc

    Soccer still isn’t a sport…..


  23. Yeah its for “guys” alright…

  24. nun

    I love him.

    - NUN.

  25. Funeral Guy

    GAAAAAYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!! (Did I mention that this is VERY gay?)

  26. yabo

    Seriously, on what planet is a skinny, tattooed (yeah we get it you’re a tuff guy) effeminate douche considered remotely masculine? For fuck’s sake people he plays kickball, but only when he isn’t sitting out like a twat ’cause he has a boo-boo…

    Oh and a nice but futile attempt…he’s British remember…to make it look like he’s packing. This fuckhead is overcompensating on every level.

  27. #22 – “Soccer” is the advice my granddad gave to my father when he complained that my mother was acting up and was wondering what he should do next.

  28. Ms Whiplash

    Buddy’s hot as hell, but he actually looks way sexier to me in the pics in his suit. Posh is a lucky, lucky lady. They make a pretty hot couple.

  29. eric

    i’d go gay for him…

  30. Val

    God he’s beautiful. As long as he keeps his stupid fairy mouth shut.

  31. Courtyardpigeon

    I’m guessing he probably has gotten laid more than I have. Just a guess.

  32. plaga7


    You dickass… Football is the most important sport around the world… just cause you AMERICAN only cares what your ignorant country likes means nothing!

    About the picture? So freacking GAY.

    chupen una buena verga putitos!


  33. That’s a BIG ROPE! :)

  34. Some Girl

    They ruined this picture with that hair.

  35. Huckleberry Hashimoto

    What an idiotic pose. They’re obviously trying to give him the 1940s Clark Gable sort of look, but the ugly tattoos scream “21st Century Douchebag!!”

  36. AW75

    #19 Fragile???
    Sorry buddy, but you can make a steaming hot pic of a naked athlete without turning him into some cheesy gay icon. The guy looks ridiculous. With a body like that, they really screwed up to make him look ridiculous.

  37. havoc

    Wow, sounds like I struck a nerve with the beaner….


  38. Death2Speidi

    Right on #18….this guy is heaven on earth…until he opens his mouth.

  39. O.M.G. And I like the hair.

  40. Zanna

    Look what’s hanging on to Britney’s tampon string….

  41. threetimesalady

    He has a really fuckin weird voice. But I’d still sleep with him because first and foremost I’m a lady and secondly because it looks like he’s packin some heat or a lot of quarters. Either way I’m prepared to take that risk.

  42. AW75

    #37: You are hitting vacuum, havoc. Get over yourself, u racist slob.
    (Bless the day this nation finally got the economy its people deserve)

  43. JungleRed

    He is so fucking hot. That’s how a man’s body is supposed to look. mmm…

    I think Tom Cruise just peed on himself.

  44. Becks United

    Brilliant headline!

  45. this is how all men should look like!!!!!

  46. dingdongdonkeykong

    wish every man was like him. unfourtunately majority are fat slobs.

  47. KickRocks

    you homos can pick apart this photo shoot all day long, but the fact remains the same – this dude is fucking HOT and pretty much anyone’s wife, girlfriend, mother or sister would F this guy if given a chance. Get into it.

  48. eurotrash

    its football, not soccer… aside from that, this guy’s perfect physique is completely ruined as soon as he speaks..

  49. Me

    Anyone posting after Me likes to bend David Beckham’s third leg.

  50. Lila

    He’s hot. Nice to see some gratuitous male pictures for a change.

    @32: Grow the fuck up.

    Loooove the false bravado of anonymity and what it does for insecure teenagers.

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