Saturday night, fashion designer Christian Audigier threw his daughter Crystal Rock a 16th birthday party in Hollywood that made every single episode of My Super Sweet 16 look like it was filmed at goddamn Chuck E. Cheese. Take a look at what he sprung for:
1. Two cars delivered by Paris and Nicky Hilton. Who doesn’t love a grim look at the future?
2. T.I. Because sweet 16′s are totally gangsta, dawg.
3. The Pussycat Dolls. What’s a birthday party without strippers? Mazal tov!
4. Miley Cyrus’ boyfriend Justin Gaston. Minus the Miley, add extra gay.
5. Khloe Kardashian. So everyone felt more beautiful by comparison. Good thinking.
Jesus, with a shindig like this I’m surprised there wasn’t a secret room full of blood diamonds and baby panda skins. Her parents must hate her.
Phil says, "huh?" | November 23, 2008 at 10:04 pm
I’d possibly risk jailtime for that. Her AND her bank account.
Amy | November 23, 2008 at 10:08 pm
Pray for mimi!
El | November 23, 2008 at 10:09 pm
She’s 16 years old and already have cellulite??? (Pic # 2)
riz | November 23, 2008 at 10:09 pm
i;m pretty sure those photographers crouching in front of her got a crotch shot. how could they NOT, her dress is practically non-existent.
El | November 23, 2008 at 10:10 pm
She’s is just 16 and already have cellulite??? Pic #2
Famous Plastic | November 23, 2008 at 10:11 pm
That’s sick. I would say she will definately be the next Lindsay Lohan.
Jessie | November 23, 2008 at 10:15 pm
blah blah.
Don’t care for her.
c45j | November 23, 2008 at 10:18 pm
at the moment.. she is beautiful.. but like lindsay lohan, she will crumble.
Mal | November 23, 2008 at 10:20 pm
God will someone ban this dating site spammer???? PLEASE!?
crabby old guy | November 23, 2008 at 10:26 pm
Yet another f-tard “celeb parent” throwing wads of things at their child. Yeah, that outta work out real well. You know, having her actually get a job, save money, grow as a person, learn the value of herself and others isn’t what they have, what they look like or what they wear – well, who the fuck would want THAT for their kid?
Laura | November 23, 2008 at 10:27 pm
I used to think paris Hilton was the hottest thing ever.
As she’s getting older, it doesn’t seem quite so effortless anymore. She looks like she tries really hard…
Laura | November 23, 2008 at 10:27 pm
I used to think paris Hilton was the hottest thing ever.
As she’s getting older, it doesn’t seem quite so effortless anymore. She looks like she tries really hard…
Ted from LA | November 23, 2008 at 10:30 pm
Laura,
You’ve got to be shitting me, right?
?!? | November 23, 2008 at 10:51 pm
Seriously? T.I.? Two cars? Underwear models dating jailbait?
How much of that does this girl actually need? Why would anyone who is single and *16* even need two cars?
Her parents spoiled that girl silly… Watch her in a couple years, when she has to learn to be a grown-up and discover other survival techniques than clacking your heels and saying “Daddy!”.
When she was 9, she actually got a unicorn. Just because it was Thursday. Then Madonna broke into the barn and drank its blood.
?!? | November 23, 2008 at 10:51 pm
Seriously? T.I.? Two cars? Underwear models dating jailbait?
How much of that does this girl actually need? Why would anyone who is single and *16* even need two cars?
Her parents spoiled that girl silly… Watch her in a couple years, when she has to learn to be a grown-up and discover other survival techniques than clacking your heels and saying “Daddy!”.
When she was 9, she actually got a unicorn. Just because it was Thursday. Then Madonna broke into the barn and drank its blood.
skee lo | November 23, 2008 at 11:01 pm
who the fuck & what the fuck
Ted from LA | November 23, 2008 at 11:04 pm
Praying for Laura.
DC | November 23, 2008 at 11:05 pm
yeah, shes pretty hot, id hit it…what? 16 you say?
BRB FBI
Joemomma | November 23, 2008 at 11:08 pm
Laura needs to lay off of the crack.
Monkey Poop | November 23, 2008 at 11:11 pm
Rosa needs to be kicked in the Va Jay Jay
kbbb | November 23, 2008 at 11:22 pm
Hey, it’s that Paris Hilton’s my BFF girl! Behind Paris!
Amy | November 23, 2008 at 11:29 pm
Justin still has Billy Ray Cyrus’s lipstick all over him!
krispiana beaverhausen | November 23, 2008 at 11:33 pm
does it ever bode well to name your daughter after not one, but TWO different crazymakin’ street drugs?!
Laura | November 23, 2008 at 11:34 pm
“You’ve got to be shitting me, right?”
Don’t worry, Ted, I’d never shit my favorite turd!
jadorepandas | November 23, 2008 at 11:38 pm
she has great legs though.
give her a break: if your parents were as loaded as her parents are, im sure they;d spoil you too. i mean, its her 16th birthday and her dads a famous millionaire designer. if she didnt have a party like this, id be surprised. ya know?
Valkyrie | November 23, 2008 at 11:46 pm
#24 = lolz
#14 madonna + unicorn= awesome
It isnt surprising that’s she’s a sad spectacle of a stereotype. What is surprising is that I looked at most of the pics.
AmstraD | November 24, 2008 at 12:21 am
Is Audigier really famous ? I thought that guy was an imposter, i mean in France he’s a total jerk.
Knee Ya Ha Ha | November 24, 2008 at 12:32 am
So,
Sometimes America we feel you go a bit -’off topic[‘ as they say in the industwee.
Like #1-28 – Inside job ?
Having any problems with free fall collapse speed through undamaged steel structure? molten metal in the ruins,?stand down of NORAD? gravity? that type of thing ?
Comments ?
audrey | November 24, 2008 at 12:34 am
OF COURSE justin was there.. he just loves the young ones, doesn’t he??
ummm...yeah | November 24, 2008 at 12:35 am
What a fuckin waste…
Knee Ya Ha Ha | November 24, 2008 at 12:41 am
Gr8 points all # 30-31,,,,,
iNSIDE JOB?
Ted from LA | November 24, 2008 at 12:50 am
Inside job it was, Binkster.
Cliff Notes | November 24, 2008 at 12:57 am
Well. Ok. I think the point these Chinese guys are trying to make is steel framed buildings don’t suddenly collapse because of fire – much like your gas stove doesn’t suddenly collapse because of fire.
Geronimo | November 24, 2008 at 12:59 am
I thought this little chick was hot until I saw pic 2, and her cellulite made me gag. Hate to see what she’s going to look like at 26.
'Frank' from 16th floor | November 24, 2008 at 1:05 am
Well # 33 Mr, Notes. Gr8 ! What are you weelee trying to say here exactly ?
(Cheers Ted.)
Inside job ?
Cliff Notes | November 24, 2008 at 1:08 am
Inside job.
BondJamesBond | November 24, 2008 at 1:28 am
Hey this chick is a hot little number. Paris? She’s tired and has a beak for a nose.
Cliff Notes | November 24, 2008 at 1:38 am
Kreskin :So Bond # 37…. I’m predicting you’ll never be here again….
Inside job ?
Kreskin-It's not just the micrphone in the glasses- | November 24, 2008 at 2:04 am
So…the more I ,like, reach ‘waking state’ the more I realize I don;t know who this chick at the top of this drivel is – or care.
But. Ok. = it’s me Kreskin.
And I must admit I couldn’t predict that ‘free fall collapse speed though undamaged steel structure stuff.’
(So sue me)
Tina | November 24, 2008 at 3:10 am
That bitch is wearing the christian louboutin shoes I want, rob her!
Cornelius | November 24, 2008 at 3:12 am
Great, another brat who gets the world delivered to her on a silver plate. She looks like she would deserve a solid spanking.
Kreskin-It's not just the microphone in the glasses- | November 24, 2008 at 3:13 am
Gr8 idea Tina….
Inside job ?
Kreskin-It's not just the microphone in the glasses- | November 24, 2008 at 3:17 am
So – Corny # 41. Very spanky…..
Inside job ?
Danklin24 | November 24, 2008 at 3:52 am
Dont worry guys, the spoiled brat got whats coming to her, they had the car tricked out at Unique Autosports im sure, which means its got spray painted parts all over the inside and will most likely fall apart in a week.
Kevin | November 24, 2008 at 4:01 am
I like her and think she is damn sexy, no sane guy here would pass up the opportunity to get with her.
My friend recommended me a very interesting and HOT place ???INTERRACIALLOVING.COM??? where many fans are together, also I’ve meet kinds of black and white singles who are hunger for true love online.
tc | November 24, 2008 at 4:49 am
#1 Jailtime ? What for, she is 16 ?
Oh yes, I forgot. The US is a ridiculous puritanical country who tries to pretend that people aren’t sexually active until 18, and don’t drink until 21. Fine to go off to another country and murder someone, drive a car, or handle a gun before then though.
Tara | November 24, 2008 at 5:09 am
Just turning 16 and you can see that she has implants, her boobs have that ridge on top that real boobs don’t have.
Australian | November 24, 2008 at 5:20 am
uber jealous, stop your bitching, she’s having fun.
Guy | November 24, 2008 at 5:50 am
People who are saying she is hot are obviously brain washed. Just because she’s blonde and wears mascara doesn’t make her hot. I actually think she looks a bit chubby, see picture 2 at her face.
gerard Vandenberg | November 24, 2008 at 6:29 am
America still hasn’t enough LOSERS, folks?