Criss Angel magically sucks ass in Vegas

September 29th, 2008 // 81 Comments

Criss Angel gave fans a special preview of his $100 million Cirque Du Soleil show “Believe” over the weekend, and what do you know? It TANKED. Audience members reportedly walked out of the theater and demanded their money back after witnessing an epic fail covered in douche sauce, according to the Las Vegas Review Journal:

“Everyone in the bathroom was chanting ‘bull—-’” from the urinals, Damon Ranger of Chicago told me Saturday. “It was absolutely awful. You can ‘Believe’ how bad it is — because it’s terrible!”
People streamed out of the theater on Saturday screaming about how poor it was. A group of six women was led by a woman yelling furiously, demanding their money back.
“Dude, it’s a train wreck,” Ranger said. On a scale of 1 to 10, he declared “Believe” a zero.
Two other Angel fans, Steve Moffett and Jordan Wilson, flew in from London for Friday’s debut.
“We were hysterical about coming. We came. It was a waste of time,” Wilson said. “The magic’s not even magic.”
Moffett and Wilson walked out before the ending, because Angel started singing the finale, a cover of his “Mindfreak” TV theme song.
“He broke into song. I said, ‘He’s singing. Now we’re leaving,’” Wilson said.

Jesus Christ, he sings?! Wow. I guarantee you if I were in that audience, I would’ve rushed the stage and repeatedly punched Criss Angel in the uvula. Then I’d disappear! SHAZAM where’s the fire exit?

Thanks to Steve who’s holding the Jack of Clubs.

superficial

  1. E. Norma Stitz

    Nothing special about Chriss Angel. Just your average everyday douchebag.

  2. Snarfy McSnarfpants

    Well I’m glad that someone put this up there, I was actually thinking of flying out to see his show.

  3. its like he is forcing her to kiss him bloody niggar !!!

    XOXO !

  4. He loves to SUCK, this FAGGOT!!

  5. Used to BELIEVE

    The “chick” in ths pic is his bi-sexual SKANK and they are ALREADY OVER (thank god) (if they were EVER an item in the 1st place) – now he has moved on to Hef’s LEFTOVERS – who just trade OLD RICH MEN FOR YOUNG RICH MEN – GET A JOB BITCHES!

    Check out Perez Hilton’s column where Criss’ PUBLICIST stands up for him – HELLO ???? Isn’t that what he is PAID TO DO???? Isn’t that HIS JOB? Of course he will SPIN the reviews favorably!

    And Perez Hilton? Lowest of the low (isn’t he GAY??) So, no wonder HE would stand up for Criss —– he probably would LOVE TO LAY DOWN for him too!

    NO LIP SYNCHING CRISS —– if you can’t sing LIVE, TAKE THAT PART OUT!
    That is just toooooo stupid.

  6. “An epic fail covered in douche sauce.” … that’s brilliant!!!!

    http://wtcctr.blogspot.com

  7. kehau

    I am a big fan. He is unreal on tv, But thouse dam RABBITS gotta go
    get rid of the BLODDY DANCING RABBITS and do more MAGIC

  8. SHAUNEE

    FUCK YOU ALL YOUR JUST PISSED, BECAUSE YOU DON’T EVEN MAKE HALF OF WHAT HE MAKES. HE’S AWSOME GO BACK TO YOUR SAD PATHETIC MIDDLE CLASS OR LOWER CLASS LIVES, IF YOU DON’T LIKE HIM GO FIND SOMETHING ELSE TO DO, AND REMEMBER YOUR MIDDLE CLASS AND LOWER CLASS TWITS, IF I WERE ANY OF YOU I WOULD KILL MYSELF. FUCK YOU AND FUCK ALL YOUR FRIENDS.

  9. look

    You guys are so wrong….this is one newspaper reporting on the first “preview” performance. You guys no nothing about putting a show together or how a Cirque show works. Why are you copying something that is obviously unfair. Just wait until the show officially opens and judge for yourself. You guys are so full of hate that you fail to understand the concept of Criss Angel Believe. It’s not a traditional magic show and you failed to mention that Criss and his cast received standing ovations. Stop trying to destroy Criss and learn to love.

  10. rizu

    yea its just a preview show.
    thats why there are a lot of mess ups in it.
    it even says that theyre will be when you buy the tickets online.

    and if you hate him, then don’t complain
    because i doubt Criss Angel would ever read what you say
    or even care about it.
    he’s knows there are people hate him and there are those who love him.

    and face the truth
    you can’t make everyone like you,
    there will always be people wanting to bring you down.

  11. TWIT

    NO NOT DOUCHE-BAG, MORE LIKE AFTER BIRTH.

    THE CIRQUE DU SOLAME SHOW WITH THIS POOR EXCUSE OF A PERFORMER BLOWED.

    WHOEVER AT CIRQUE SUGGESTED THIS SHOW SHOULD BE FIRED – IF NOT ALREADY!

    COULD THIS SPELL THE END OF CIRQUE DU SOLEIL?

  12. watch your money disappear :

    Criss Angel “Believe” show was unbelievably bad! The only magic was watching your money disappear on the price of tickets. The show is all costumes, dancing, watching video, fancy props and worse than amateur effort at magic.
    Would not recommend attending even if you had free tickets unless you really want to see for yourself just how really bad this show is. When he does speak to the audience he really comes across as a total moron.
    Really really bad show. Can’t “Believe” this show made it to opening. Someone should be fired. This one can’t last.

  13. watch your money disappear :

    Criss Angel “Believe” show was unbelievably bad! The only magic was watching your money disappear on the price of tickets. The show is all costumes, dancing, watching video, fancy props and worse than amateur effort at magic.
    Would not recommend attending even if you had free tickets unless you really want to see for yourself just how really bad this show is. When he does speak to the audience he really comes across as a total moron.
    Really really bad show. Can’t “Believe” this show made it to opening. Someone should be fired. This one can’t last.

  14. frances

    You fools are wrong about criss angel. His believe show was really good. It did have some mistakes but that is why it was a pre-show. We took our son and he loved it. During the show Criss Angel came out to the audience and picked up our son, it made his year. We also got to meet Criss Angel after the show he was a really nice guy. Don’t be jealous because he has what you wish you had.

  15. Real Magic Fan

    Cost of the production… $85 Million

    Criss’ Potential salary…. $100 Million

    Seeing him exposed as the cheesy, no talent hack that he is…… PRICELESS!

  16. CA fan

    Is Luxor offering a full refund? Ok, how about a partial refund.

  17. da mighty perv

    i was supposed to work backstage on this show for a college internship last summer, but it never worked out due to budgeting reasons.

    thanks fucking god it didnt work out.

    LOLS.

  18. da mighty perv

    i was supposed to work backstage on this show for a college internship last summer, but it never worked out due to budgeting reasons.

    thanks fucking god it didnt work out.

    LOLS.

  19. just me

    I went to the show a few weeks ago during my 1st visit to Vegas. I was really looking forward to it. Unfortunately it really did suck badly; people did leave during the performance. Big waste of the significant ticket price.

    Cirque Du Soleil fans won’t like it because there aren’t significant acrobatic stunts or amazing feats of human strength and artistic agility; MindFreak fans won’t like it because there aren’t enough magic tricks/illusions.

    The show’s premise/story/plot is uninspired. The “script” is a pathetic.

    CA’s charisma (or lack thereof) doesn’t work with this live show format. I actually do feel bad for the guy. He seemed to be apologizing for the show at the end!

    What I remember most about the show was trying not to laugh at how truly bad the show was as I walked out past the kids selling the show’s program books–poor kids.

  20. Ronn Winter

    Well… I must say, Im so happy to hear he is getting bad reviews. Obviously, alot of adults went to see this show, and thats not his audience. The comments about his ego is his number one problem. He’s all about himself and all his riches. He puts minimal effort into mindfreak which is why I stopped watching it after season 2. I hope these bad reviews humble him a little.

  21. Ronn Winter

    Well… I must say, Im so happy to hear he is getting bad reviews. Obviously, alot of adults went to see this show, and thats not his audience. The comments about his ego is his number one problem. He’s all about himself and all his riches. He puts minimal effort into mindfreak which is why I stopped watching it after season 2. I hope these bad reviews humble him a little.

  22. catrina

    Wow….was it really that bad?? I’m just a humble Canadian, but at least I can say Thank God nobody as lame as Criss Angel came from us…….sorry guys, I feel for ya ; )

  23. Ignacio

    Seriously, it sucks bad. I’m a magician, actually I consider myself an amateur on the business- I’ve seen many mistakes on Criss Angel TV Show but before judging him I decided to give him a chance and I went to see him perform live, first row, two tickets, as I went with my 65 years old mother.

    I felt sorry for him, you could see everything. My old mother saw clearly how every illusion was made, she used to be amazed watching his TV show, now she said she wont lose her time watching that creep anymore.

    Seriously, if you want to see a magic show in Vegas, don’t go to see Criss Angel’s Believe, it’s on the same level to other low budget shows on the Strip like Dirk Arthur’s which is not that good either.

    To see a real magician, a great artist, you can see perform Lance Burton, that’s what I call a great illusionist. He might not be a ‘singer’ nor have a bunch of dancers and smoking-put rabbits on stage, but I’m pretty sure he’s better magician than Criss Angel and he’s worth the money, not like MINDFREAK.

    Whatever, I lost my 350$ when I went to see him, now I regret but it won give me my money back. If you still have the chance, pick another show. For example when I got out I thought “Damn, Should have gone to Fantasy”. That’s my call…

    BELIEVE!!!! IT SUCKS BAD!

  24. amy

    wow no matter how much someone dissapoints these comments show how much we hate ourselves

  25. LV Local

    I am a local. I have seen several Cirque shows. I thought Chris was a real entertainer. Not now. I think he is a sell out if he continues to let this go on. If he will continue to take money for this show, what wont he do. If he doesnt step up to the plate… This show is the begining of a permanate disapearing act. Very disapointed. Sorry Chris, its true.

  26. This show SUCKED so bad. WE GET IT! You can make birds appear. At least our son thought it was a good “enough” rendition of Alice In Wonderland. He did nothing like he did on his tv shows. The only good part about this show is when we got to leave.

  27. mike altringer

    By far the most overated show in Vegas. 30 minutes before he even came on stage. 5 lame stunts for the whole show. I think most people in the room agreed as there were almost no appluse after each trick. Went to Penn and Teller next night one thrid the price and 3 times better. I Believe I was cheated by paying $100 for the tickets..

  28. ghez

    I WENT TO THE SHOE PEOPLE ON FRIDAYY AND IT WAS AMAAAAAAAAAAAZING! I LOOOOOOVED IT!
    WHAT R U PEOPLE TALKING ABOUUUUT?

  29. bruce

    I am a big fan of all magician and all magic shoe. I saw Criss Angel Believe in vegas on 042010. It sucked. NOT worth the $120.00. The vegas $30.00 magic show was better than Criss. Save your money, Copperfield, or Lance Burton or any other no name magician is 10 times better than him. Criss is ruining the CIrque du Soleil name. Why Cirque would let him use their name is beyond me. There was nothing Cirque du Soliel about his bull shit magic acts. He keeps repeating the same disappearing and reappearing trick through out his entire show. It SUCKED.

  30. Joe

    His magic is as good as the popcorn commercial. He’s a filler for everyone else’s stuff that actually works by itself. fake. He’s the worst magic act I ever seen.

Leave A Comment