Welcome to a new feature on The Superficial where I make our photo editor work even harder for my approval only to completely ignore him while I drink my beer and stare at the television. Builds character. Anyway, throughout the course of the day we don’t get a chance to feature all the photos we want because Charlie Sheen shot another hooker or my tum-tum needs a nap-nap because writing penis jokes makes me sweepy. So here’s the inaugural post featuring such wonders as: Tracy Morgan bare-chested with a lightsaber. A sad, dateless Dane Cook arriving to his own birthday party. That kid Taylor Swift is banging despite being named “Chord” and Vanessa Hudgens in a tank top because we’re gonna get that Pulitzer, dammit.
Pageview? What’s a pageview?
- The Superficial
Click Here to Start The Gallery
Photos: Fame, Flynet, INFdaily, Splash News, WENN



































Well, it looks like Vincent Gallo’s cock really does have magic powers. Evil magic powers.
“Don’t hold your hand like that, sweetie. People will know.”
LOLOL!
Looks like Danny DeVito in drag, only less classy.
I just threw up into my mouth a little.
How does she get that color? Does she go to the tanning salon and ask for the Oompa Loompa?
Did her Spanx give out on her? That’s one supa-dupa belly! Time to STOP making the doughnuts! Never did like chicks who remove their shoes in a club.
“And Justin is this big”
She didn’t eat it. She posed with it, licked her fingers and then barfed.
Looks like Snooki is “presenting” her goods again…..she must be in heat
Tracy Morgan has never been remotely funny. He gets by 100% on knowing the right people, completely talentless shite.
That is the least realistic wax sculpture I have ever seen.
Her ass is way too flat for my liking.
He did say someone was going to get pregnant…
Eve made a comeback!
I see that Ke$ha lost her bikini top, and should pick up a bottle of sunscreen.
“Mr. Space-Bieber, would you please demonstrate what you did when Space-Usher offered you ‘something to wash down the Jesus-Juice?’”
I remember the first time I saw Kendra Wilkinson. She was bursting out of John Hurt’s chest in “Alien.”
Donald Sutherland shaved his mustache!
We’ve seen what tiger-blood does, and now we see what leopard-skin does…is there no part of a jungle cat that is safe to use for formerly a-list actors?
This chick was never A-list and never much of an actress, for that matter.
Exercise class? From the stunned look on her face, I would have guessed she was leaving a class on theoretical physics.
How many Kardashians ARE there?
This is like air guitaring for porn stars.
Dancing with the Stars? Oh, I thought the show was “Who will look the most like Kirstie Alley in 10 years?”
Holy shit – when did nick note and Courtney love procreate?
Introducing the new white-beater. I mean wife-beater.
Someone should introduce them to mirrors. Just set one down next to them, and RUN
The other side of the bag reads . . . I have none.
I always wonders what happened to that guy from party oF 5. Hmmmm. I coulda sworn that whole cast died.
Omg that’s my same ‘eating doritos’ outfit
Why does he have a dead baby pooch?
Damn! That bitch is gonna make ANOTHER shitload of money when Louis Vuitton pays her to NOT be seen with their products!
Aw, damn! The “Guntettes” have reunited and I missed it?
That’s some scary shit… I am gonna have nightmares now. Uggh!
They think they’re raising the roof. Reality is, the floor is lowering. Club Owner: This building has a basement? Who knew?
Vincent Gallo told her that his man-goo was full of protein and good-luck. That was a half-truth.
Seriously, she is a smart, responsible woman who takes care of her kids and isn’t out at ‘da club’ partying all night long. STFU.
exactly, she’s a smart responsible woman who has a nanny take care of her kids and a personal chef and housekeeper so that she go and get her fitness on. Hey Milf, how bout you STFU.
LMAO, cutt
Sprinkle the rice on the floor. Sumo’s about to start.
I’m Rick James, BITCH!
Brown Bunny Brown Bunny Brown Bunny Brown Bunny!!!!!
Proof positive that we will fuck and marry anything regardless of common sense. Let me know when this guy is fighting domestic abuse accusations and living on a friends couch.
Clearly we can tell which one likes it in the ass the most.
Chord who????
You see ladies! Sucking dick for a living does payoff!
What is he shopping for? Brass knuckles???
nah, talent. He heard there’s a good sale going on when you buy the coat tails of one Michael Jackson, you get to beat Rhianna’s ass for free.
Paging Mr George Clooney…Paging Mr George Clooney…your next conquest is waiting for you. There is your future replacement Stacy.
She thinks they taste even better coming back up.
…… and this is your face on cock.
Bravo, sir! Bravo!
even after an abortion, a bag of Doritos is just what a girl needs!
ok, wtf is happening with these young bitches with gunts? Do they own fucking mirrors? Seriously, my dinner just came up.
nothing creepier than some dude who’s face looks about 12 yrs old with a juiced up body! Yikes!