The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 3.15.11

March 15th, 2011 // 237 Comments

Welcome to a new feature on The Superficial where I make our photo editor work even harder for my approval only to completely ignore him while I drink my beer and stare at the television. Builds character. Anyway, throughout the course of the day we don’t get a chance to feature all the photos we want because Charlie Sheen shot another hooker or my tum-tum needs a nap-nap because writing penis jokes makes me sweepy. So here’s the inaugural post featuring such wonders as: Tracy Morgan bare-chested with a lightsaber. A sad, dateless Dane Cook arriving to his own birthday party. That kid Taylor Swift is banging despite being named “Chord” and Vanessa Hudgens in a tank top because we’re gonna get that Pulitzer, dammit.

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- The Superficial

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Photos: Fame, Flynet, INFdaily, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Bucky Barnes
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s one strange looking marital aid. Do the holes decrease wind resistance?

  2. H6E6X6
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess working at a nursing home can have it’s perks

  3. RebelMinion
    Commented on this photo:

    Initially, a rhinestone g-string seemed like a good idea to Justin.

  4. who cares?
    Commented on this photo:

    her bag reads “physique”. no.

  5. RebelMinion
    Commented on this photo:

    In addition to trouble, our little Tori enjoys cooking, where she mashes potatoes with her face.

  6. reformed_druid
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s a Chord?

  7. dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Remember that term “Eraser-head”?…

  8. RebelMinion
    Commented on this photo:

    Can we call that a Pussy Eating Grin?

  9. RebelMinion
    Commented on this photo:

    In the moments before her lips exploded, things seemed relatively calm.

  10. dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Next on the crotch-grabber express is personal jesus Justin Bieber….

  11. who cares?
    Commented on this photo:

    i was entirely unaware of the fact that one could look smug whilst eating doritos. touche, bitch.

  12. dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    The white guy disguise ain’t workin’ Pookie, we still know you’re Chris “ouch, my wip” Brown.

  13. RebelMinion
    Commented on this photo:

    When Deena asked the dressmaker if she could create the perfect outfit in her size for her trip to Vegas, the only question that came to mind was.”How many inches in an acre?”

  14. lady jesus

    i don’t know why 30 rock writers insist on showing off his fat, stretch marked mutant body.

  15. dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Angry ginger kids scare me.

  16. dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    Oops! She did it again!

  17. RebelMinion
    Commented on this photo:

    In a moment of unparalleled introspection, Selena thought “This chip may outlast my career”

  18. Rather Dashing

    Sooooo… we didn’t miss much, did we?

  19. That Bastard Tony

    I would have thought he would have been kicked the fuck out of the Jedi Order for that gut. Yoda sad this makes. Need to visit a gym you must. Casual sex, you will not have.

  20. dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    What is this? A Macauley Kulkin look-alike contest? You win!

  21. reformed_druid
    Commented on this photo:

    I think his contains some kind of mind control device that makes him see a 20 years old.

  22. dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s so in touch with his feminine side.

  23. noooooooo
    Commented on this photo:

    Lucky bastard, gets paid to be a crazy man and do wild antics. Can’t think of a moment on 30 Rock where he’s ever had a taxing situation.

  24. dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    I am speechless.

  25. reformed_druid
    Commented on this photo:

    When did they move all the Eskimo women to Jersey?

  26. AbbeyRoad
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is Kramer there?

  27. mos rough
    Commented on this photo:

    God damn! one her legs looks like those giant sewer pipes…

  28. moe moe moe
    Commented on this photo:

    jesus fucking christ…those huge, stumpy legs…those thick ankles…those lumpy, flat fucking feet…i think i’m gonna barf..

  29. Ksurfiws
    Commented on this photo:

    Loving the Paul Simon Photobomb.

  30. Commented on this photo:

    Must be French Stewart Friday at the Tao.

  31. mos rough
    Commented on this photo:

    I would love to see Daniel Craig in a remake of “Mobsters”

  32. Commented on this photo:

    He looks like Macaulay Caulkin singing about being home alone…

  33. Commented on this photo:

    He looks like the love child of Eminem and Ice Cube.

  34. Commented on this photo:

    Nobody likes dirty blonde hippies making troub, especially in Hollywood. Take your hackey sack and go home.

  35. Commented on this photo:

    Justin Bieber’s angrier, much gayer brother trolling for Ed Hardy shirts.

  36. Commented on this photo:

    Creepiest valet EVAR.

  37. Commented on this photo:

    She knew she was out of shape when she couldn’t open a tin can with her chin anymore.

  38. Sarah
    Commented on this photo:

    The guy in the back looks like Keanu Reeves. Sort of. LOL

  39. SnarkyG
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know Pee Wee Herman had a brother.

  40. Commented on this photo:

    Seeing this made me think about what a great couple Jessica Simpson and her hair stylist would make.

  41. Commented on this photo:

    Since he’s got Sisqo’s hair can we call him Chrisqo now?? Please say yes.

  42. SuperT
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn, Fire Marshall Bill is looking pretty good.

  43. SuperT
    Commented on this photo:

    You just know that his jizz is 80% glitter.

  44. Commented on this photo:

    I…like…this.

  45. Commented on this photo:

    Flavorless Flav

  46. Ruth
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s because he realized his zipper is open, ya’ll.

  47. Commented on this photo:

    Um, I’m a little peeved I can see the shoes, guys. Sheesh.

  48. Commented on this photo:

    Not a lot of us can say we have a picture of ourselves the exact moment puberty struck.

  49. babablacksheep
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks thrilled to be with Doritos and whoever the crazy guy is – just as long as she isn’t with the recent un-lesbian Bieber.

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