Courtney Stodden Sold Her Sex Tape For $1 Million
Not even two days ago, we learned that Courtney Stodden was shopping a sex tape because one of TMZ’s hobbies is doing PR for Vivid who apparently is willing to spend $1 million for a “solo sex tape” where you don’t even see the dongs going in. I’m not a porn king – Yet, Dad. – but I believe the proper response here is, “BWHA?!”
When TMZ broke the story that the 20-year-old’s solo vid was getting shopped around … Hirsch said he was impressed by what he’d seen. Now we know just how impressed.
Hirsch fired off a letter to Courtney offering her $1 million to lock up exclusive rights. The letter hints at bonuses … saying there’s potential for her to make even more than the mil.
Ball’s in her court now — but we’re guessing she’s on board, and reached that decision in less time than it took for you to read this sentence.
As for what’s so impressive about a sex tape that has to be the human equivalent of watching a Barbie doll rub itself right down to the hole-less, feature-less vulva-bump, here were your guesses:
“Most porn stars don’t make with the alliteration on camera: ‘Powerfully pumping this polystyrene penis to pleasure my pussy!’ – JC
“In fairness, I haven’t seen anyone try to shove a parking cone up their ass yet. No, wait… yes I have, Never mind.” – Statler N. Waldorf
“‘Unique footage.’ I’m thinking that’s Vivid code for baby talking to the vibrator as she rubs it around her stretched pepperoni peaked zeppelins.” – Cock Dr
“Did the Russians fly her up to the International Space Station so she could frig herself in zero gravity? Which I’d totally watch, by the way.” – Frederick Buddha