Courtney Stodden Kicked Out of Pumpkin Patch Cuz Ur Mom’s Jelly

October 27th, 2011 // 179 Comments

[Ed. Note: These are all entirely different photos from the other day because she posed for roughly 500,000 of them. Shocking, I know.]

If you’re like me and a lover of America and all the freedom it affords, you probably haven’t been able to sleep since finding out Courtney Stodden was kicked out of a pumpkin patch for practicing her barely legal love of Doug Hutchison and all the taint showing that’s entitled to under the Constitution. So who could’ve committed such a heinous crime against liberty? Turns out it’s moms. Those jealous, jealous moms. Via E! News:

“The dads loved it!” she exclaimed. Hutchison agreed, but put a more kid-friendly spin on what went down.
“There were a lot of people who wanted to take pictures with us,” he said, “and we overheard a dad say to his little girl, ‘Oh look, honey, they have a pumpkin-patch girl this year.’” (Nice save, mystery dad!)
Hutchison continued, “A lot of the kids thought she was a pumpkin-patch princess and there was a handful of concerned moms who went to the owners and said, ‘Get her out.’”

“OMGZ! This is Facebook all over again!! I just wanted to trolloply trance through tilted tangles of tantalizing pumpkins while tittily tumbling Doug’s tawdry testicles in a tight teddy that tickles my turgid tan tomatoes. – Ezekiel 12:13″

Photos: GSI Media

superficial

  1. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Commented on this photo:

    The weirdest part about this whole thing for me, is the fact that a pumpkin patch has security.

  2. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Commented on this photo:

    If only that were an anvil.

  3. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Commented on this photo:

    Scoliosis is not a laughing matter. It’s sexy as fuck though.

  4. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that a nipple, or weird shadows and wishful thinking?

  5. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Commented on this photo:

    Hah! she’s totally beaving the scare-Kim.

  6. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Trixxie6690
    Commented on this photo:

    I really wish you would stop posting so much about her and Doug…don’t give people a reason to care about them. They just need to go away, they creep me out.

  7. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    yoyoblack
    Commented on this photo:

    there’s no way that that’s 16

  8. MIRF

    I guess I’m not the norm, but I absolutely love this chick!!!! She is a train wreck and I can’t stop looking at her. She’s young and dumb.

  9. FatSteamyPile

    Fuck Im out of tissues…paper towels it is.

  10. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    chicken chickenovna chickenova
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m surprised she doesn’t blend in with the pumpkins more…

  11. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    bewbs
    Commented on this photo:

    haha you can see all the tanner build-up in her belly button. or is it old semen?

  12. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Commented on this photo:

    disgusting whore. she looks about as 17 as george burns.
    and she has those scrawny bird legs that should never be shown off.
    throw in the disgusting orange skin and this is just fucking gross!

  13. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    jessie
    Commented on this photo:

    really?

  14. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    jessie
    Commented on this photo:

    everything about her is trying to hard.

  15. Southern Goodness

    Hey, you know what’s awesome, is that she’s PERFORMING sexuality without (probably) having experienced it. I doubt she feels like she’s pretty and amazing. I doubt she’s really had a chance to develop her own sexual menu- what SHE likes. I see her as a puppet. She’s doing what men like, but what does SHE like? She’s a parody of sexuality- going through the motions without feeling any of it. And sure, guys will fuck her. Yeah. Of course. But guys will fuck a watermelon. What gets HER off? I don’t think she knows . . .

  16. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Yikes
    Commented on this photo:

    Courtney Stodden is actually a RealDoll

  17. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    GuidotheRed
    Commented on this photo:

    Pumpkins have peepers… peepers to watch, watch for a moment of weakness and then BAFF on the head and you’re down!

  18. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    “WE have to go? It’s not OUR fault if men are ogling my wife—and she’s only 17, for chrissakes! Why don’t you kick THEM out for being pervs?”

  19. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    “Okay, so you stand there like that, I’ll put this pumpkin on your head, and then I’ll knock it off with a gunshot at 120 paces. Yes, a gun. We’ve been over this. It’s the 21st century, honey; people don’t use bows and arrows anymore.”

  20. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s not quite the perfect storm of famewhory, but it’s close.

  21. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Pip pip cheery-o
    Commented on this photo:

    Jesus Christ, I can tolerate a lot, but come the fuck on! If I was a mom there with my children I’d be terrified that they were gonna start filming porn right there on the pumpkins. You notice how everyone’s turned away from them? Yeah, that’s a good sign YOU’RE MAKING EVERYONE UNCOMFORTABLE. But what’s the standard douchebag, fucktard response to that? “I don’t care what people think.”
    Yeah, even the poor little children who know what they’ve seen is wrong.

  22. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Pip pip cheery-o
    Commented on this photo:

    Scratch that “who” out of the last sentence.
    You know, I’d respect her more if she’d just do porn then act decent in public.

    • JP

      Exactly. Who dresses like a porn star, grabbing her tits at a pumpkin patch geared towards kids and family? She IS a fucktard.

  23. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Pip pip cheery-o
    Commented on this photo:

    Ha ha! This is my vir-gin-a! Did I get it right, Dougie?

  24. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Ms. Fit
    Commented on this photo:

    I was thinking of wearing an outfilt like that to go pumpkin picking. : /

  25. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    So_so
    Commented on this photo:

    Isn’t this child porn?

  26. Pssh

    I would have kicked her skanky ass out of there too. There is a time and place to dress sexy… and a pumpkin patch is not one of them. Sure, if you’ve got it, flaunt it, but she is so delusioned on what sexy truly is.

  27. A

    1994 called, they would like their outfit off of her. Its giving them a bad name.

  28. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    J.M.
    Commented on this photo:

    In this picture especially, she looks mentally challenged.

  29. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    J.M.
    Commented on this photo:

    Why does she walk like that? Sorry but it looks like she is trying to walk with something stuck up her ass.

  30. paul clock

    really looking hot and sexy.

    http://buyhghextreme.com/

  31. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    hpatz
    Commented on this photo:

    nasty bitch. you’re in public, at a family-friendly place for chrissakes. makes me sick.

  32. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    yadayadayada
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like an ORANGE trailer park Daisy May and he looks like Bubba the old perv who sits in his trailer scratching his gut, waiting for his beer. Eww…pure white trash. Her parents are pathetic.

  33. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    REALLY?
    Commented on this photo:

    Her outfit! WTF? These people are nasty and they look like they smell!

  34. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Dingo
    Commented on this photo:

    Wish someone would just shoot this dumbass already

  35. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    sasha
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s all good. We’re news!!! Idiots.

  36. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Charro
    Commented on this photo:

    “I swear to god, if she doesn’t stop doing that duck face, I am gonna squash her with this squash!”

  37. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Charro
    Commented on this photo:

    “Ahhh…I love the smell of anal bleach cream first thing in the morning…”

  38. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Charro
    Commented on this photo:

    And then they claimed the DADS loved it, but the moms were just jealous??? Yeah, sorry, you have to be 18 to go to a strip club, we don’t want a free peep show for our KIDS while we’re picking out a freaking PUMPKIN, you fucking idiots! They should have been arrested, not just thrown out. See how ‘jelly’ the judge will be!

  39. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Charro
    Commented on this photo:

    Gee, I thought the men were LOVING the show? Those don’t look like jealous housefraus to ME!

  40. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Charro
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s the most clothing she’s had on all month!

  41. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Charro
    Commented on this photo:

    “This pumpkin is about the same size as your head…but it has a lot more intelligence in it…”

  42. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Charro
    Commented on this photo:

    “Oh, magic 8 ball, will I ever be a famous actress?”

  43. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Charro
    Commented on this photo:

    “Lookee! I picked an orange all by myself! I love California!”

  44. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Charro
    Commented on this photo:

    Gee, why would ANYONE be offended by THIS out in public? Some ephebophile and his teen bride? Humbert Humbert, anyone?

  45. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Charro
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, can’t see why anyone would be offended…um…

  46. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Charro
    Commented on this photo:

    Just a pair of melons in a pumpkin patch.

  47. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Guest
    Commented on this photo:

    lol why the f*ck is she standing/walking like that? Every photo is a pose.. what an idiot

  48. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Guest
    Commented on this photo:

    lol it already looks like she has skin cancer on her chest..

  49. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    no boobs back in day
    Commented on this photo:

    who is she posing for? who are taking these pictures?

  50. Courtney Stodden Doug Hutchison Pumpkin Patch
    Katie
    Commented on this photo:

    Ok, I was giving her the benefit of the doubt until I saw this one. Gross, she just loves to shove her cootchie in everyone’s face. Why? I’d be so embarrassed if I were that guy. Little Tommy should not be educated this way!!

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