Our Celebrity Boobs And Crotch Shots Are Faster Now. It’s A Christmas Miracle!

December 19th, 2012 // 33 Comments

“Waft in that speed!” – Santa

As some of you already noticed, our new gallery setup went live last night and speaking in the most technical of terms, it’s fast as fuck. So no more reloading the page with every pic, just a smooth, smooth ride through celebrity schadenfreude and random Argentinian bikini models just like Baby Jesus asked for on the day of his birth, but no one had Internet back then so he killed all the dinosaurs in a murderous rage. I saw the whole thing.

On that note, there are still a few bugs to work out, including finding out if the Zoom feature didn’t survive the transition. And if that is the case, let us join together in a moment of silence to remember all those times we used it to look for nipples and/or Lady GaGa‘s hermaphroditic wiener.

We bow our heads,

- The Superficial

Photos: GSI Media

superficial

  1. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    God
    Commented on this photo:

    g
    Enough with that fucking arm thing

  2. Deacon Jones

    I noticed I can scroll now through the thumbnails, even though I have this bullshit firewall at work, good shit!

    One thing I noticed, is if you try to vote a comment the log in box keeps popping up.

  3. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    rican
    Commented on this photo:

    The Zoom Fish, Where is the Zoom!?!?!?!

  4. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    Commented on this photo:

    Mr. & Mrs. Hutchison… Giving the “X” in “Xmas” an entirely new meaning.

  5. Snooki's Taint

    I Saw Blondie Humping Santa Claus …

  6. My deepest sympathies to the kid that stumbles across these pics in a search for what Santa and Mrs. Claus do in their free time… unless that kid is over 12 years old in which case I’ll just say Merry Early Christmas. Here’s some socks and some tissues, you’ll need them. See you in two weeks.

  7. tlmck

    “Our Celebrity Boobs And Crotch Shots Are Faster Now.”

    Without the “view original” link, they are also smaller. The “view full size” has almost always been smaller than “view original”. Oh well, back to Google.

  8. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    Commented on this photo:

    Too bad that unknown fuzzy thing, at the extreme left side of the frame, wasn’t a polar bear rushing towards them.

  9. I_miss_speidi

    Oh, please not again – this picture already ruined my last Christmas

  10. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    debo
    Commented on this photo:

    Mmm…young lady I see a future for you in porn! HO HO HO!!

  11. USDA Prime McBeef

    These pictures smell old and musty and not just because they are recycled from last year.

  12. Sheppy

    New gallery = Good.
    Disgusting white trash couple = Bad. So very, very bad.

  13. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    mamu
    Commented on this photo:

    santa saves a lady from the cold snow

  14. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    Commented on this photo:

    Never mind all that … what’s with the black tongue ??? She’s been eating black balls ???

  15. Is Santa doing what I think he’s doing?

  16. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    Where's Dildo
    Commented on this photo:

    The problem is that the white hairs get stuck between the teeth. I’m talking, of course, about his beard hairs getting stuck in her vagina teeth.

  17. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    Monsignor Nelson
    Commented on this photo:

    ♫ Courtney the skanky famewhore
    Had a very shiny snatch
    And if you ever saw it
    You’d notice that it has no thatch

    ♪ All of the other famewhores
    Used to laugh and call her “Ho!”
    They wouldn’t let poor Courtney
    Appear on any TV show

    ♫ Then one sunny Christmas day
    Santa came to say
    “Courtney with your snatch so smooth
    Mrghurrghbbrrlllgggrrttthhmmmmggrrrg”

    ♪ Then how the famewhores loved her
    And tweeted out her name with glee
    “Courtney the skanky famewhore
    You gave St. Nick an STD !”

  18. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    Commented on this photo:

    Listen, you two monkey-fuckers, your antics were cute at first. Well, maybe not cute…attention-grabbing…and I stuck up for you once in a while. But now it’s becoming obsessive and offensive. Why don’t you both knock it off and disappear while there are still refills available on your Thorazine prescriptions…

  19. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    Commented on this photo:

    I need to go see an exorcist or something because — damn me to hell — I think she actually looks kinda sexy here…

  20. Whenever I’m trying to type a comment, if I press one of my arrow keys it loads the corresponding picture. Can you fix that?

  21. anonym

    not gonna lie

    I’d hit it. then quit it.

  22. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    scramble
    Commented on this photo:

    who thinks this is sexy? pretty gross to me. such a cam whore/attention seeker right? duckface overload!

  23. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    another mike
    Commented on this photo:

    When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
    I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
    Away to the window I flew like a flash,
    Tore open the shutters and threw up on the “snatch”

  24. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    Throb the Wonder Mule
    Commented on this photo:

    I just hope and pray she doesn’t mar her perfect skin with some ugly tattoo…..

    Who am I kidding?

    Ho,ho,ho…..

  25. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    Molly
    Commented on this photo:

    Guess who’s getting an STD for Christmas.

  26. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison Santa
    donkeylicks
    Commented on this photo:

    Ah, the true meaning of Christmas.

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