Courtney & Doug Have Something To Tell You

Goddammit, this is like watching a unicorn die. WHY?!?

Earlier in the week, we learned that the greatest romance of every single generation known to man was coming to an end, and now comes an official statement from Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchison letting us know that even though we’ll only see one of them on the weekends, they both love us very much. Strangely, they don’t say this is all my fault for touching myself at night, but I know it is. I know it is. Via The Daily Mail:

After two and a half years of marriage, Courtney and Doug have decided to become legally separated. This is a mutual and amicable decision that they’re making together. As you know, Courtney was married at a young age. Now, at nineteen, she’s interested in exploring life as an unmarried single young adult — with the freedom to explore her independence. Doug supports Courtney 100%. The two will share custody of their precious pup, Dourtney, remain living in the same house [for now] in separate bedrooms, and Doug will be co-managing Courtney’s career.
“We love each very much, want for each other’s happiness, and will continue being the best of friends for life”. — Doug Hutchison and Courtney Stodden

Granted, some people might say that living in the same house, but in separate rooms, while Doug still manages Courtney’s career is basically the same exact arrangement as before minus the subtext of pretending she’ll eventually have sex with him, but those people have clearly given up on life and the pursuit of love’s sweet rewards that Courtney and Doug dared to reach for. It takes a village, you guys. Or in this case a day care with very lax security, but you get where I’m coming from.

Photos: GSI Media