Courtney Stodden in a Bikini: Episode 1 The Airbrushed Menace

October 3rd, 2011 // 330 Comments

Welcome to Part 1 in our two-part series “Courtney Stodden: Kid Prostitute.” Here she is in Los Angeles fulfilling the sacred rite of passage for starring in a reality show: Canned bikini photos. Except these are way more messed up than anything Heidi & Spencer could ever possibly imagine thanks to the inclusion of airbrushed abs and child bride lap dances. On that note, I’d like to welcome our new Mormon readers to the site, who found us by Googling “child bride lap dances.” The prophet Joseph Smith would be proud according to these gold plates only I can see under my desk so you know I’m not making this up.

Photos: GSI Media

superficial

  1. WhoCares**

    If her abs were really real from working out, then her ass and backside wouldn’t look so squishy. They forgot to paint the backside…

  2. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    KJ
    Commented on this photo:

    Either it’s airbrushed or she has rickets.

  3. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    realityishardtits
    Commented on this photo:

    Thats actually not a nipple but where she is where padded inserts inside of her padded push up

  4. realityishardtits

    Shes trying so hard to be Pamela Anderson , she even wears that stupid cuff thing Pam used to wear.

  5. jess

    Why the hell does he have only one pant leg rolled up?!

  6. jess

    Also, his face says: “I came.”

  7. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Crapass
    Commented on this photo:

    My god, RealDoll technology has advanced by leaps and bounds…. but they still don’t look like they’re really alive.

  8. Twizlah

    She looks like she has been eaten by a bear and shit off a cliff.

  9. Gross. I don’t want to hear about this fucking weirdo.

  10. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    jim
    Commented on this photo:

    nice penis

  11. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    m
    Commented on this photo:

    That ham wallet looks beat to hell for a seventeen year-old.

  12. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    jim
    Commented on this photo:

    seriously. what is going on with her penis. i’m just saying.

  13. Obi Wan Kenobi

    Average looking brunette + bleach + fake tits = hot?

  14. DogBoy

    The “Make A Wish” Foundation fulfilled Lil Dougie’s last wish… a lap dance from a teenage skank. Now, back to chemo Dougie.

  15. Voodoo

    Hahaha I like her “abs” she should probably get a qualified spray tanner to make her abs look less noticeably fake or actually work out on them abs.

  16. Truk

    Respectfully not touching her privates so she’ll let him do it later.

  17. Dude of Dudes

    When life hands you cancer nothing says “stay positive” like a plastic gold digger.

  18. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Truk
    Commented on this photo:

    Without airbrushing, the whole rest of her body looks like that elbow.

  19. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Haha
    Commented on this photo:

    Loving the band-aid mark…Hepatitis vaccine?

  20. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Dude of Dudes
    Commented on this photo:

    I like how her eyeliner matches her hair roots.

  21. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    moose
    Commented on this photo:

    She can pay for ab-tanning (or maybe Doug did it?) but she can’t trim the beaver beard?

  22. Sammy Davis Jr. Jr. Public School

    i would cum so fast inside this nubile whore, you could use it to prove Einstein wrong

  23. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Mortimer
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m not sure if I’m happy to see almost a nipple or sad to realize that fake tits aren’t enough, she needs a fake bra as well.

  24. zomgbie

    51 year old c-list tv character actor finds out bubbly 16 year old wife is actually a 31 year old trailer park single mom of 3 erotic dancer named “Viagriala” at Jeb’s Truck Stop Bar&Grill.
    hilarity ensues.

  25. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Lucy
    Commented on this photo:

    Woo that bikini top is padded to the max! You can see where the nipples are!

  26. AreIsEnough

    Her mottled skin and ratty hair makes her look like she has mange. OK, I’d bounce my nuts off her chin, but she looks really fuckin’ used for 16. Who’s the retard with her?

  27. forrest gump

    just one simple question.
    …………..is he rich?

    if so: F*CK THE *SSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!

  28. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Alipop
    Commented on this photo:

    This girl is SIXTEEN. IMAGINE what a mess she’ll look like at 30! She already looked like she’s been through the ringer, and apparently she thinks this looks sexy. Aak! Her frontal lobe hasn’t even developed yet!

  29. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Jack Ketch
    Commented on this photo:

    About as sexy as cold margarine …

  30. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Jack Ketch
    Commented on this photo:

    Implants placed way too high … I don’t think they’ve even dropped yet …

  31. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    asf
    Commented on this photo:

    asdasdasd

  32. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    j
    Commented on this photo:

    Sloth love Chunk!

  33. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    oh i know
    Commented on this photo:

    it’s a tuck!!! i thought so!!

  34. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Commented on this photo:

    17 yes but a hard ridden, haggard 17. Fake boobs? probably not, just a major (ill fitting) push up bra, but she is showing nipplage on 12 and 40. Air brush? def not, just a bad suntan sprayer in abs area other wise they would have air brushed her vitaligo on her arms. Skanky? for sure. They will be divorced either during their show or as soon as it ends

  35. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    BG
    Commented on this photo:

    Her tits are a lot smaller than the bra but actually look pretty decent themselves. if she got a nice thin small bra that fit her chest nice and let a little nip show through that would probably look a lot better. her nips looks nice and pink. also her ass isn’t half bad in these.

  36. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Karl
    Commented on this photo:

    if she is 17 she has one hell of a untoned body, my wife is 35 and her body is wayyyyy tighter and less floppy than this girl…crazy shit.

  37. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Krissy
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh my word she is so freaking wrecked! Meth face much?

  38. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Bazza
    Commented on this photo:

    OMG look at her cheesy spray on abs.. Like really.. PLEASE

  39. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Bazza
    Commented on this photo:

    Yep sure those are REAL… Really WTF who do they think there fooling..

  40. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Krissy
    Commented on this photo:

    Uhhhh so gross this makes me wanna vomit!

  41. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Commented on this photo:

    realityishardtits if you don’t see nipplage on 12 and 40 you need to get your eyes checked. there is more also but those 2 shots are very clear

    • realityishardtits

      U can still see the padded inserts even if her nips are showing , her boobs are like 3 inches away from the inside of that top and sry but only a few pictures of her is enough, I feel a mix of disgust, pity and stickiness for her .

  42. lotsofbabies

    Gross….child porn. You can see nipple.

  43. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    Do_FreeBird
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, terrible photoshop on the legs! FDR had better looking legs at 60 and he had Polio.

  44. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    blonde
    Commented on this photo:

    Did she color-by-numbers her “abs?”

  45. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    angela
    Commented on this photo:

    Ok, am I the only one who thinks it looks like she has a dick and balls in most of these pics? seriously- look at it ppl!

  46. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    oh i know
    Commented on this photo:

    is he correcting her form??

  47. Man, she looks like a dried-up piece of jerky with tits. Sitting on another piece of dried-up jerky. With tits.

  48. trm

    Maybe it’s just me but – I swear it looks like this girl has had a baby. In some of the pictures it looks like she has a faded c-section scar and her stomach looks like she’s had one. If that’s true, its even less likely this girl is actually 17. Which was already at about 0%.

  49. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    angela
    Commented on this photo:

    she looks so jacked for a 17 year old

  50. Courtney Stodden Bikini Photos Airbrushed Abs
    carrieann26
    Commented on this photo:

    While she was at it, why didn’t she airbrush the skin disease off of her arm?

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