Courtney Stodden Still Believes In America

March 20th, 2012 // 134 Comments
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America has a lot of problems right now. Our gun laws are murderously lax to the point where you can just shoot a black kid for carrying Skittles and get away with it, a legitimate potential presidential candidate literally wants to make porn illegal thanks to every single red state declaring war on the female vagina until it becomes nothing more than a walking cattle chute for babies, and probably most alarming to me because I’m a white male who really doesn’t worry about that other stuff if I don’t want to, our current president has offered to do everything in his power to facilitate the making of an Entourage movie. Except despite all that adversity, this is still a country where a young, once-innocently beautiful girl like Courtney Stodden can watch reality stars on her TV sexualize their way to fame and untold riches and follow in their footsteps by turning herself into an erotic fiction tweeting child-bride that people will swear was born a boy. So we may not get everything right, America, but dammit, we get it right where it count- Holy shit, stray bullet! Quick, hand me a vagina without a baby in it to use as a shield!

Photos: Coleman-Rayner

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  1. Deacon Jones

    What a GREAT SET OF TITS!!!!

    • Shasta

      That’s not the word I would have chosen. I was thinking more of “fake and somewhat obnoxious.”

      • Shasta

        And it makes me sad that this ugly excuse for a clam stamp made it back onto this site. I was enjoying not hearing anything about her.

      • Rapsutin's Evil Twin

        When you say “fake and obnoxious” do you mean her fake tits, or the whole package? There’s more plastic in her than in the board.

      • Shasta

        All of it, but especially her tits.

      • mine is like putting a banna between two oranges

        If u zoom up on her tits u an see the padded insert under her left one , saaaad

  2. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice ass sweetie, keep it up

    • diaz

      um no her ass is sooo flat

      • mel

        nope. it’s beautiful. not all of us like enormous ghetto asses. big ghetto asses also smell far worse than nice tight ones like the one pictured above.

    • Deacon must be really left alone a lot.This ass is pretty damn flat for it being on a teenager. That hiney should be round and firm, but it is flat and droopy. And the girl herself is nothing more than a made up slut with absolutely no personality or brains. She has relied on her body to get her things since pre-puberty… Hell, judging by what is known of her, I wouldn’t doubt if she hadn’t lost her virginity before she hit 10 years old… Hell with her and the freak show pedophile that married her…

  3. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    DALESQ
    Commented on this photo:

    Look, my farts make rooster tails!

  4. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Lee
    Commented on this photo:

    she has a nice body but her face looks like like shes 40 trying to look 25!

  5. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    DALESQ
    Commented on this photo:

    aka, Courtney Stodden goes for a walk with a surfboard to fame whore it up on an LA County beach…

  6. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Oscar
    Commented on this photo:

    Do her feet not go flat? Why is she always walking like she is in high heels? It’s like she has perma-Barbie foot.

  7. J

    So is she going to actually surf or walk around with the board.

  8. Tom

    Guns aren’t the problem, it’s the lack of basic parenting in the black community. They don’t know right from wrong and pull out a gun every time they feel “dissed”.

    • Shasta

      Did you read the story at all? It was a white guy who shot the black kid. Not sure what blacks and guns has to do with it. Oh, and you’re a racist piece of shit.

      • Uhh

        Sorry, but the guy’s Hispanic.

      • Shasta

        Yeah, I just double-checked and I was wrong. Sorry. But my point about “black parenting” being irrelevant still stands.

      • MrsJackWhite

        It probably wouldn’t hurt if more dads stuck around and raised their kids though.

      • El Jefe

        He looks Hispanic, but he has a Jewish name. I am so confused.

      • person

        Sometimes mixed couples have sex and make a baby.

      • “Zimmerman” could be German, too, but of course you’d go there, Venom.

      • You guys missed the point. No black kid should be allowed to walk around in the rain wearing a hoodie and packing not only Skittles, but….Iced Tea! For the love of fuck, are there no limits to the outrage these kids will perpetrate? So if anyone’s gonna protect America, it’s a gun-toting neighborhood watch captain who can tell which black kids are on drugs and up to no good just by looking at them, and knows that stalking and gunning someone down is the same thing as claiming “fear of bodily injury”.

        P.S. Tom, you’re an amazingly ignorant fuck. Now here’s $10 and a hoodie, go make a run to the convenience store.

    • It’s everyone, not just the black community. Parents these days aren’t parents but “friends”.

      Yeah, if I messed up when I was a kid I got the belt or a 2×4. Didn’t take too many of those before I decided to straighten up a bit.

      • Corporal punishment doesn’t work and causes long-term problems but okay, I guess things were better back when child abuse was okay

      • BULLSHIT. Corporal punishment does work. It worked for most of the people who were born at the same time as I was or before.

        You must be a proponent of “time out” which doesn’t work either ASS FACE!

  9. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    She wipes out in 6 inch surf.

  10. El Jefe

    She has a pretty banging little body.

  11. dontkillthemessenger

    What is the allure of looking like a porn star, but not actually being in porn? Everyone thinks you’re a whore anyway, might as well earn a paycheck for it.

  12. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    ViableDoner
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s a FLAT ass

  13. SashaCohen

    Nice try. It isn’t that the “gun laws are murderously lax”. It’s the Keystone cops in FL that don’t give a sh*t.

  14. person

    Fish, thanks for the declaring war on the female vagina link.
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/soraya-chemaly/womens-reproductive-rights_b_1345214.html
    Every woman in the U.S. should read that article

  15. So she straightened the hair but still looks like shit; nice.

    Now, stop trying to fool us into thinking you are 17 and make the porn flicks.

  16. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    mrsmass
    Commented on this photo:

    i love how she has no shame even if her chicken cutlets are hanging out the bottom of the bathingsuit top.

  17. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Commented on this photo:

    Just one big gust of wind and we’d be rid of her forever.

  18. I’m not clicking the link “Justin Beaver gets beaten up”. If it said, Justin Beaver got the shit beat out of him and Michael Lohan kicked him in the vagina; then and only then would i click the link.

  19. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    rican
    Commented on this photo:

    Carrying the board just like a real surfer would

  20. NRA4LIFE

    Only an idiot would think that our current gun laws have anything to do with the kid that was shot. If the kid was killed in a car wreck, would that mean we have murderously lax car laws?

    • If the kid was following by a frustrated police wannbe in his car because he was convinced he was on drugs and up to no good, and went so far to call 911 on his cell and apprise them of his suspicions because the kid was doing nothing more than walking in the rain wearing a hoodie, and had the local police telling him to stop following him and drive away, yet in spite of this he disregarded that admonition and went ahead and ran over the kid on the sidewalk with his car and killed him, would that mean you’re any less of an idiot with that car analogy?

      • greenman

        Holy shit, that “paragraph” is just painful to read….run on sentence much? YEs redefined actually….if youre trying to make a statement that is supposedlly witty, dont type like a ignorant asstard whlst doing so…my god…plz go back and finish the school you missed, i.e. kindergarden and up

  21. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Snooki's Taint
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s a fat girl in that skinny girl screaming to get out. because the skinny girl ate her.

  22. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    stacy
    Commented on this photo:

    OK. Have to admit thats a nice ass.

  23. Bringbackbabalu

    Or the problem is clueless lemmings like FIsh, who rant and try to make everything so black and white. Fact of the matter is, if there weren’t any people like you, Fish, this country would be amazing. Courtney Stodden is just a slut. That doesn’t mean she is totally naive about reality and real life.

    I miss the Britney posts, that was the only time you were ever funny or witty. When you try and start with your communist or whatever beliefs you sound like some 3rd world immigrant that is mad he got deported or something. If you don’t like it here, go back to the rice field you were spawned and quit crying cause your pussy has rice in it. Thanks.

    I mean blaming gun laws? If we had different gun laws, ONLY THE CRIMINALS AND THE GOVERNMENT WOULD HAVE THEM! We made the gun laws because of people like you that would take away our guns and our freedom. Fish, you should realize if you had your way the world would be ruined already. If you are too stupid to see the obvious reality of it, you really are just fucking up the gene pool, go away.

    • Dr.J.Fever

      What? ‘you were spawned’ is like being punked? Get lost troll!

    • So if only criminals had guns, how would previously non-criminal white folks shoot black folks?

    • Maybe YOU might want to be a little less “black and white” about gun laws you’re fucking clueless about, because that overly simplistic attitude that if ANY gun restriction is enacted, then voila – only criminals and the Fed’ral gub’mint would be entitled to have guns – is about as black and white as you can get.

      An unarmed kid was shot in the street by a man who thought he was entitled to draw down on him. That’s because, after targeting and pursuing the kid, even after being warned off by the cops, he accosting him and then claimed he was threatened with deadly force under the “Stand Your Ground” law and had the right to retaliate. Since “Stand Your Ground” was enacted in 2005 in Florida it was meant to apply to “hearth and home”, but since it was enacted so-called “justifiable” homicides have tripled – do you really think that there was an actual 300% rise in deadly-force home invasions in Florida during that time? Because I don’t.

      The shootings been excused by the courts, and it’s the assumption that under the law that anyone who shoots first is a victim with the right to defend himself is exactly why a vigilante like Zimmerman still hasn’t been arrested. So “your ground” in Florida has now been expanded to include your entire neighborhood and now comes with a pair of running shoes to chase down unarmed kids you think shouldn’t be allowed in it. Yeah, that’s exactly what the Second Amendment was meant to provide for – a permanent way to keep those undesirable kids off your lawn. Oops, I mean, the public streets.

      You shouldn’t be allowed to claim self defense under the law if you are in fact the attacker, and that’s exactly why this law should be hobbled.

      • Technically You're Wrong

        The man said he was defending himself, as an American citizen he has a right to protect himself and his property, that’s never going to change. Did he lie? It’s possible he is lying but that does not mean we need to adjust the constitution. Poeple lie and people get killed, welcome to being human.

      • Technically You're Wrong

        You should keep in mind justifiable that we have these laws to protect people from lunatics like yourself. Might want to come to grips with how raving mad you are before you entertain a social lifestyle.

      • Technically You’re A Moron, what “property”, exactly, was he protecting out in the street? As for defending his person, he was warned by the 911 operator not to follow the kid after he called in to report him for suspiciously “just walking around”. When several callers called 911 to report a confrontation between the two, screams can be heard before Zimmerman’s gunshot, and it wasn’t Zimmerman who was doing the screaming. So how exactly does this law “protect people” here – except, of course, for the person who made a conscious choice to be the aggressor in a situation?

        Heads up, nimrod – if your “social lifestyle” entails running to the corner store for a snack and I don’t like how you’re toting your Skittles,you better not do it in my neighborhood. I already own a gun and now I know I’m justified in protecting both myself and my property. “My property” now appears to be defined as any place I don’t want you to be – so yeah, it’s actually a really great law!

      • BTW, it may have escaped your attention that the kid, who was unarmed, was also an American citizen. So don’t you think at the very least he’s entitled to walk to the corner store without getting stalked and killed? Or is it only the gun owners who have rights in your little world?

  24. Pewpsock

    “PLEASE VOTE FOR MY ARM BAND!!!”

  25. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Mel Sharples
    Commented on this photo:

    This chick proves it takes more than big tits to get famous. It’s not happening. The Kardashian lightning isn’t going to strike twice (no talent chick gets famous just because of her huge ass or tits).

  26. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    NOI
    Commented on this photo:

    When her feet touches ground, the earth’s going to KABOOM

  27. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    CanuckCutie
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, she actually looks pretty here. It doesn’t look like a forced pose or smile or anything. I’m not sure how to feel about this :S

  28. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    R
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like she finally got implants

  29. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    Doug must be gay. There isn’t a photo set were she isn’t fondling her own breasts.

  30. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    O'chunt
    Commented on this photo:

    10 of 10 photos viewed. Did not see a whole lot of surfin’ but saw plenty of whorin’.

  31. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    turd da third
    Commented on this photo:

    looks like there is something wrong with her titties in this pict,, the silicone must be slipping

  32. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    suck it
    Commented on this photo:

    I wish I had her bra padding skills when I was 17… She is like a magician. I envy her. Oh wait I don’t… I eventually got implants and they look and feel amazing.

  33. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she wearing invisible stripper heels? Or have her feet just frozen in that position?

  34. anonym

    i won’t lie.

    i’d hit that 10 times, then throw her in an alley dumpster.

  35. idon'tgetit

    Can she actually surf? Or does she just think it cool to walk around with the surfboard? Ridiculous

  36. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    weirdo
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d like to sniff that ass and then lick it!

  37. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Commented on this photo:

    Where’s her 6-inch spike sandals?

  38. Clarence Beeks

    I’ll be that “surfboard” is made of styrofoam. Those sickly stick arms couldn’t hold up a real one.

  39. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Lola
    Commented on this photo:

    Well chew me up and shit me out…she actually looks fairly cute and (gasp) young here.

  40. See

    Where’s Doug?

  41. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    sweetlips
    Commented on this photo:

    Lose the ridiculous armband

  42. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    JANE
    Commented on this photo:

    Her hair makes my hair cry

  43. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    JANE
    Commented on this photo:

    That face :( Please get eaten by a family of sharks.

  44. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Lynx
    Commented on this photo:

    damn.. caught myself rubbing one out, might as well finish now.

  45. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Walkaway_Joe
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m still trying to figure out what her Hollywood master plan is with all these taudry, slutty photo-ops.

  46. lawn

    These photos were taken last July 4, hence the swimsuit. They are only appearing now because that’s how long it took to ‘shop out all the wrinkles and liver spots.

  47. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    KickNdaJunk
    Commented on this photo:

    Anything more than waist deep, and I guarantee she melts.

  48. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Commented on this photo:

    Good picture.

  49. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    Commented on this photo:

    You’re doing it right. Now bring us a hundred more just like her.

  50. Courtney Stodden Bikini Surfing
    mbcl
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey check out this crazy hat I just found”

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