If you’re wondering how Lindsay Lohan‘s sobriety is going, terrible. It’s going fucking terrible. Probably the worst you could possibly think of it going. Via Independent Woman:
Courtney Love has claimed she is Lindsay Lohan’s sobriety coach.
… “I’ve taken up Lohan because nobody else will. She’s further down the line than I was, because there was no [gossip website] TMZ then,” she told Details magazine.
Courtney didn’t reveal any more details of her relationship with Lindsay, and the younger star has not yet commented on the report.
Much like Charlie Sheen, I’ve pretty much reconciled myself with the fact that Lindsay Lohan will never die because God secretly loves drug addicts. But if there somehow is a way she can be killed, I’m pretty sure it’s going to be this. This should do it.
Photos: Splash News
Randy Quaid looks horrible.
Seems legit. Pablo Escobar was Charlie Sheen’s life coach and that turned out ok. For both of them…
Old man…Those lips and what’s under that dress has been rumored to cause men to shotgun their faces off. Stick to the Jager my friend.
Kirstie Alley is Jessica Simpson’s eating coach.
They’re the highest names on one another’s dead pools, too! This is going to be like Christmas and 9-11 had a baby!
Wrinkled, disheveled dress, breast exposed, hair a mess… clearly Grizzly Adams wasn’t her first Jon of the night. Obviously not her last….
Isn’t that the old guy from Taxi?
Robin Williams looks like shit.
Unless it’s Randy Quaid, which would mean he actually looks better than usual.
I thought the same thing LOL
I didn’t know the Gorton’s Fisherman had an addiction problem.
Winner!
I find it impossible to believe anyone is ‘further down the line’ than she has ever been.
Courtney Love. Robin Williams. The Fisher King 2: The FIshering.
Courtney is probably better suited for something like the Fish-ina Monologues.
Robin Williams never looked better.
Just as interesting is that Fish apparently reads “Independent Woman”. What’s the matter Fish, your copy of “Sassy Girl Journal” late this week? Hahahahaha!!
Robin Williams doesn’t dress up at all when he goes someplace.
When will she realize no one wants to see them?
In related news, Newt Gingrich is Herman Cain’s sexual addict mentor.
Hell why not just hand her over to Charlie Sheen the end result would be faster.
Courtney Love being Lindsay Lohan’s sobriety coach is like Adolf Hitler tutoring her in race relations.
Awesome. This would be like my drunk aunt being my sober coach or vice versa. I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that a “sober coach” is more like a glorified drug dealer and less of a sponsor, perhaps. But, really, this just might be the funniest shit I’ve heard in weeks.
in other news, dina lohan is adopting courtney stodden.
and Jerry Sandusky becoming Justin Bieber’s showering coach
omg.
I cannot imagine why Kurt Cobain killed himself.
Yeah, LiLo is screwed!!!!
PLEASE BE A TRUE STORY! that means both of these pigs will be off the planet in the next few years. FINGERS CROSSED!
Totally thought she was doing duck-lips with Robin Willipoo
No one has had the heart to break it to Courtney that her meeting with Lindsey was just a hallucination.
Somewhere in Middle America, there’s a state filled with non-evil twins. Some are named Lohan, some Love, maybe Kardashians (too uncaring to remember how it’s spelled). But L.A. is where the evil ones go. There, and Long Island.
Trust me, I know a lot about this topic.
free nip!
is it really free? i mean after all it is courtney love i think we’re all paying for it already…
Oye Vey! Those tits!
What an awful looking, decrepite, smelly old homeless person! And why is she bothering that guy with the beard?
That’s Radioman, you cretins.
Next up on ABC, it’s a Mork and Mindy are reunited for a very special Christmas on Earth!
why does she feel the need to display the silicone flapjacks she calls boobs – it is disgusting
Scariest boobs ever.
Leave Jessica ALOOOONNNNNEEEE!!!!! … (sob, sniffle.)
I mean, “Courtney” –
They all start to run together …
He is on 30 Rock. I think he is more famous and loved then she is. http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0144425/
are we sure “taking up lohan” isn’t just crazy kid slang for taking up more hard drugs?
Maybe it’s just me … ok, it’s just me but I’ll shoot her up. She looks like a fanatical cum-junkie.
The only thing that would be better than this story being true would be this story being true and Courtney Love starts dating Michael Lohan.
That’s the same man who plays the homeless person on 30 Rock.
Wow, Randy Quaid is trading up from his wife Evi. I can’t believe I actually said that Courtney Love is a trade up, but tits are tits.
This’ll go about as well as when Kurt Cobain was Dick Cheney’s safety instructor.
well, this is the best thing since Jesus Christ “landed”.
Why would you want her to die? Easy to write for, but I know why…you’re inhumane.
Damnit! It’s either her, or us, and we outnumber her. It’s time she’s put out of our misery.
I’m no longer sure if the “she” is Love or Lohan, and it doesn’t matter anymore. How about a two for the price of one?
Moon Vest! “Gimme yer fingernails!”
Curse you new zoom feature! Curse you and my traitor clicking finger. Now I’m off to Amazon to see if eyeball wash is a real thing.
Wonky boobs :/
Ewwwwww!! Did that implant deflate right in front of the camera?
A batshit insane drug addict with boobies!