Country Music’s Mad At Ashton Kutcher

April 3rd, 2012 // 62 Comments
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For some reason, somebody thought it’d be a great idea to invite Ashton Kutcher, the guy who fucked over Demi Moore by banging 23-year-olds on their wedding anniversary, to Sunday’s American Country Music Awards to present Female Vocalist of the Year to Miranda Lambert which he did, but only after showing up in a ten-gallon hat and smirking the whole time. Naturally this didn’t go over well with Miranda who we already know will cut Chris Brown. Us Weekly reports:

Upon reflection, Labmert herself wasn’t amused by Kutcher’s schtick. The star, 28, tweeted late Monday: “Was Ashton Kutcher making fun of country or is it just me? Watching it back now and I’m kinda wondering?”
Fellow country singer Justin Moore was more direct — and visceral. In the audience at the MGM Grand Garden Arena, he tweeted, “Seen Ashton kutcher at the acms tonight. What a douche! I don’t care for people making a mockery of the way country artists’ dress.”
Indeed, there was no love lost between Kutcher and most of the crowd during the show and at an afterparty, insiders reveal to Us.
“People were just like ‘why is he here?’ – he has nothing to do with country,” one attendee told Us “Nobody laughed at his dumb jokes, in fact he came off as rude. He didn’t mingle.”

As much as I hate country music, these are all good questions because I also hate Ashton Kutcher. Why was he there? Was he making fun of country music? Can someone who doesn’t look like Johnny Cash or a flamboyant youth pastor in an Affliction shirt get away with wearing a cowboy hat in today’s political climate? Was that last question aimed at Rascall Flatts? Would anyone care if it was? Is there going to be a punchline to this post? Will you be surprised if there isn’t? How much do I get paid for this job? Do you really want to know?

Photos: Getty, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN


  1. Cock Dr

    You can shave a douchebag, fluff it’s hair, dress it up, put a big fancy hat on top of it, but it’s STILL a douchebag.

  2. it had to be said

    He wasn’t smirking. He was joyful at having bet the Bandit that he couldn’t take a case of Yoo Hoo from Las Vegas to Knoxville by midnight Tuesday.

  3. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Well hello sideboob! Yes, I am single. No, I do not own a gun or a truck. ~Ashton Douchebag Yehaw Kutcher

  4. Richard McBeef

    Miranda Lambert running her mouth outside the kitchen and without black eyes makes for a mockery of country music far greater than anything Kutcher can do.

    Oh wait, he brought a black guy in a cowboy hat? Nevermind.

  5. I guess all those years of bullies beating up boys named Ashton, you’d think they would have knocked some sense into this one.

    • Schmidtler

      I blame the public schools and all their anti-bullying nonsense! Back in the olden days, we’d have swirley’d and wedgie’d the douche out of this Ashton jerkoff before he got to the 6th grade!

  6. Tornadoes in Dallas today. Question; If a tornado meets a Wookie does the wookie get sucked up or does the wookie suck up the tornado?

    • It does seem like an opportunity for Chuck Norris to put a lot of questions to rest.

    • brand name

      Aston is like a tornado. You run for cover and scream when you see one. It destroys things in its path. Plus it sucks all the life out of a room…

  7. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn you Kutcher, now I need some Skoal.

  8. JC

    If they was real country folk, they woulda tied him up and drug him down a dirt road behind their pickup trucks, instead of tweetin’ like a buncha gay Yankees.

  9. Bianca

    The funny (to me) thing is that when he stood next to Miranda Lambert in her shiny pleather corset, grandma’s curtain skirt and mismatched jewelry, I honestly couldn’t tell if Ashton’s outfit was a joke or not.

  10. [img] wagoner-340_351.jpg[/img]

    Country Music people are upset at Kutcher but Porter Wagoner was doing it a long time ago.

    • Yes, but with a horrifying lack of irony.

      It might be funny if I thought AK could spell “irony.” Without that, all that is left is obnoxious, and the hope he gets stomped by someone holding an empty bottle of tobacco spit throughout the stomping.

  11. Frank Burns

    Kudos to the Kutch! After long holding the title of “Most Punchable Face in Hollywood” Kutcher has now added “Most Punchable Face in Country Music”. Look out Mrs. Temperance “Granny” Hayes of Wichita, Ashton will take your “Most Punchable Face in Quilting” title next!

  12. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    Jon Hex
    Commented on this photo:

    “They’re this big. I showed up, didn’t I?”

  13. Why was KISS there? Why was LL Cool J there? Why were half the people that performed there? Ashton fucking Kutcher is the least of their problems.

  14. “The Moores and the Kutchers” doesn’t have quite the ring of “The Hatfields and the McCoys” but with any luck there’ll be some shootin’ before this is all over.

  15. dooood

    there’s a lot of great folk music and bluegrass out there but what goes on in nashville with the radio power country is just as bad as
    katy perry, hilary duff etc.

    sometimes people make music for the right reasons, sometimes
    a group of duchebags get together and create some disney jailbait whore in a laboratory and market them as the next britney etc.

  16. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Country Music people get over yourselves
    you do dress like crap

  17. Jonesy

    I’ma go down to tha corral and rope me a gawl-dang teenager! Where my horse at? SKIPPY!

  18. o0

    Country does a fine job of making fun of itself. It didn’t need Ashtons help.

  19. El Jefe

    Country has not been country for a long time, maybe 20 years now. They made a mockery of themselves long before the King of all douchebags did. The country singers today are nothing more than thinly veiled pop stars for the most part.

  20. Mick

    – Justin Moore… tweeted, “Seen Ashton kutcher at the acms tonight. What a douche! I don’t care for people making a mockery of the way country artists’ dress.” –

    Seems to me when you dress like a color blind retard you don’t have much room to talk… teal.

    How is AK any worse than this asshole? I guess Justin Moore’s cul de sac was more COUNTRY than the rest of the suburbs.

  21. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Who doesn’t make fun of country music? “We like to pretend we live in the 1950s. No darkies welcome.”

  22. To answer your questions:

    Because celebrities attract attention and he, for better or worse, is a celebrity.

    Probably, but then country musicians do enough to make a mockery of country music on their own.

    I hope not.



    Probably not.

    Not really.

    Fucked if I know.

    Again, not really.

  23. tlmck

    Why do networks do this? The awards were on CBS, so they have to pimp CBS actors on it.

    I was George Strait, I would have jumped up out of my seat and beat Kutcher’s ass on live TV for doing that to one of my song’s.

  24. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Ten gallon asshat.

  25. Fred

    Dear country music fans: you dress like clowns. When some dude not from the neighborhood shows up in your clown suit, you’re all like “man, he looks like a clown.” Have you ever looked in the fucking mirror?

  26. Mouse

    Make you a deal. We’ll stop sending Ashton Kutcher to the CMAs if you all lay off the damn Country-Pop crossovers. Next year, we’re adding Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton. Think about it.

  27. JPC

    Oddly enough, this makes me like Ashton Kutcher more.

    Country music blows and country “artists” look like idiots.

  28. Ashton's Mom

    He could have showed up in an Armani tux, and he still would have acted like a douche. Can’t wait for him to douche up the Steve Jobs movie. Douche.

  29. Maria

    Seriously, country people? He went to a country music awards show to present so he dressed up in some country music attire. I don’t see the big deal.

  30. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    problem is, Ashton don’t look inbred enough to be country

  31. What’s HE smirking at? Bitch be from IOWA

  32. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    Hetero male
    Commented on this photo:

    Brokeback much?

  33. Justin Cognito

    What does it say about the whole country scene that simply by virtue of showing up dressed like a part of it you can be accused of making a mockery of it? (Spoiler warning: not good things)

  34. Cinder

    Some of you queers seem to be forgetting who the douche bags are, let’s keep it simple.

    Chris Brown
    Russell Brand
    Ashton Kutcher

    You nitwits might watch the idiot box and fall in love with these three douche bags but that doesn’t change the fact that they are the primary douche bags on the planet. Try to focus and maintain clarity during your boners for their “talent”. Keep in mind all three are backed by the richest men on the planet and are well versed in controlling your weak brain stems.

  35. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is that guy behind the douche puking into his tumbler? Oh wait, never mind.

  36. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    King Diamond
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice fake beer bozo!

  37. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Country music people are so sensitive, you’d think they’d have thick skin after being made fun of relentlessly by real musicians.

  38. The Royal Penis

    Where’s Buzz Lightyear?

  39. Dirk

    Now I know why Demi lost it! Asshton is GAY! With his butt buddy in tow…

  40. SayWhat

    His Canon or Nikon televised commercials annoyed me, he exceeds in douchery in those commercials.

  41. Swan Jaco

    The problem with country music is that its stars are ultra-dull, boring, predictable people who sing about ultra-dull, boring and predictable themes. It has to be tough to put together a three hour show where every single artist sounds similar and says the exact same things.

  42. Ashton Kutcher Cowboy Outfit Country Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s not like he can make Country Music any more of a joke than Kenny Chesney. What’s the big deal?

  43. If’n yur style is so cheesy that ya cain’t tell when yur bein’ made fun of, ya’ll might be rednecks!

  44. Burt

    The irony lost on him is that he looked like a moron with his trucker caps.

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