Colin Farrell was photographed with some fans recently sporting a wedding band which suggests he may have already married girlfriend Lake Bell. Or maybe he just likes wearing wedding bands because it helps him forget he’s a man whore. “What sex tape? No, I don’t sleep with a different dirty girl every other night. I’m married. As you can clearly tell from this thing I have on my finger.”
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Errrika | June 2, 2006 at 3:19 pm
First? I use to think he was hot, now I just think he’s icky.
Binky | June 2, 2006 at 3:20 pm
My sources tell me he married a bottle of Bushmills – shotgun – in the Fall of 2003.
Fisher55 | June 2, 2006 at 3:21 pm
well it’s about fucking time, superfish people
wtf
bloodyvictim | June 2, 2006 at 3:22 pm
I think it’s just to convince young girls that he’s married,trustworthy and “not going to force them to cover themselves in vaseline, and ride a donkey backwards while he watches and sings the theme song to ‘my little pony’”… because he’s really not going to do that… really.
Feed_Me_Chocolate | June 2, 2006 at 3:22 pm
He looks kind of like Jim Carrey in that picture–a manwhorish, chain-smoking, foul-mouthed version, that is.
That or Guy Smiley from Sesame Street.
Fisher55 | June 2, 2006 at 3:23 pm
that’s no ring, he just didn’t wash his hands after handplowing the fatty on the right
Jacq | June 2, 2006 at 3:23 pm
Uhhh, from the looks of the girls in that picture, he ain’t married.
That or else he won’t be wearing his pants or that ring for very long.
#1 – Took the words right out of my mouth.
blueballs | June 2, 2006 at 3:23 pm
ooh ooh i am 6th!!!
I hope he makes another sex tape with his wife.
blueballs | June 2, 2006 at 3:24 pm
damn it..make that 8th..
Fisher55 | June 2, 2006 at 3:24 pm
he looks more like the Desparate Housewives gardener here
Fisher55 | June 2, 2006 at 3:25 pm
wait….handplow, gardener…i’m sensing a theme
Dr.Rokter | June 2, 2006 at 3:25 pm
#7 Looking at those girls’ pictures, you can tell they’re both in MENSA.
Jacq | June 2, 2006 at 3:28 pm
They finally feed us and THIS is what we get?!
He’s so grosso that I think I need a shower now – not including the fact that I didn’t take one this morning.
BoredBlonde | June 2, 2006 at 3:28 pm
I’D HIT IT!! ohhhhhhhhh COLIN
krisdylee | June 2, 2006 at 3:28 pm
The chick in the dark shirt appears to be pressing her tits against him in hopes of him pressing his cock into her vagina.
Ari | June 2, 2006 at 3:29 pm
Hmm… slow gossip day, I suppose.
blueballs | June 2, 2006 at 3:29 pm
the look on Colin’s face is “Fuck, I am married. I can’t bang these two girls in the arse and make them blow me like my dick is the blarney stone.
Seneca Fell | June 2, 2006 at 3:30 pm
#10 he does NOT look like the gardener from DH (jesse metcalfe) here. jesse metcalfe is a beautiful, beautiful man. colin farrell is chlamydia in human form.
also, i think he’s wearing the ring because it goes with the outfit, which makes him look like a responsible adult, kind of. not really. i don’t believe it for a second. i think he’s trying on marriage to see what it looks like, and failing to realize that marriage means you’re not supposed to pick up bimbos outside of bars.
94LT1 | June 2, 2006 at 3:30 pm
The girls are hot but holy eyebrows Batman!
krisdylee | June 2, 2006 at 3:31 pm
I liked Colin on SNL, his Bono impression was fuckin’ hysterical!
PapaHotNuts | June 2, 2006 at 3:31 pm
I wonder what he smells like? I bet someone on here knows.
viewaskewniverse | June 2, 2006 at 3:32 pm
He looks like my dad’s tax accountant.
Jacq | June 2, 2006 at 3:34 pm
#12 – If by that you mean Meaty, Eager, Nubile Sex Addicts, I can totally see that.
#15 – It looks kinda like how Joe Simpson hugs Jessica. Or tries to.
ellaminnowpea | June 2, 2006 at 3:34 pm
…dressed like that???….looks like he’s taking the hobags to swing by and pick up K-Fart for a double date on the town!
Looks like somebody’s sharing a stylist…
Fisher55 | June 2, 2006 at 3:39 pm
18, another difference: jesse metcalfe is totally gay, so unless you sport cock, keep dreaming
Dr.Rokter | June 2, 2006 at 3:40 pm
#21 He smells like the plastic teeth the dentist uses to show you what happens in your mouth when you’re not looking.
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | June 2, 2006 at 3:41 pm
I once asked Colin Farrell for a ring and he put one around my eye.
Fisher55 | June 2, 2006 at 3:44 pm
i once asked Colin Farrell for a ring and he gave me ringworm, which is just not the same
Seneca Fell | June 2, 2006 at 3:45 pm
#25 JESSE METCALFE IS NOT GAY! TAKE THAT BACK!
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | June 2, 2006 at 3:48 pm
I once asked Colin Farrell for his number and he threw a phone at my head.
Then he made #2 on my face.
True story.
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | June 2, 2006 at 3:49 pm
Wait, that might’ve been Russell Crowe.
I get them confused.
pinky_nip | June 2, 2006 at 3:49 pm
I once asked Colin for a ring and he slipped off his cockring and threw it in my martini.
dimestoredetective | June 2, 2006 at 3:54 pm
great tits on the dark haired whore
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | June 2, 2006 at 3:55 pm
I once asked Colin Farrell for a ring, and he put an onion ring in my g-string, slapped my ass, and told the DJ to play “Shout at the Devil” again. I think we should stop serving fried snacks at the Pink Pony.
DancingQueen | June 2, 2006 at 3:57 pm
# 21 – I bet he smells just like me frosted lucky charms. If the leprechaun on the box smoked Marlboros and drank Jamison all day that is…
ellaminnowpea | June 2, 2006 at 3:59 pm
hmmfph! Colin Farrell gave me a ring….around my bathtub! flithy, slimy bloke!
Toonlite | June 2, 2006 at 4:00 pm
the thing on his finger is fungus….or Irish gold…turns green as it ages…which is a couple weeks….give or take a day or two…..
jackspratling | June 2, 2006 at 4:00 pm
# 35 No, Colin smells like his frosted lucky charms– In otherwords, like the combined vaginal secretions of those two tartlets in the photo with him.
Italian Stallion | June 2, 2006 at 4:02 pm
I once asked Colin for a ring, and he gave it to me……Then I kicked his ass and called him a faggot…….true story
sharkbite | June 2, 2006 at 4:04 pm
Did he lose his chunky weight yet?
http://www.wehateeverybody.com
eightiesbaby | June 2, 2006 at 4:07 pm
Colin married, no way. He’s wearing that wedding band to attract even more girls. You know how the dirty ones are, they love a married man with money! Even if he is a man whore.
Sonya | June 2, 2006 at 4:07 pm
Those girls look waaaay too happy, considering they’ve probably contracted multiple STD’s.
Fa Cube Itches | June 2, 2006 at 4:08 pm
21: Unsurprisingly, he smells like beer and cigarettes. They filmed some of his scenes from Daredevil at a bar in Santa Monica, and he’d hang out there periodically. Nice enough guy, utbya otnay ootay ightbray, though.
Fa Cube Itches | June 2, 2006 at 4:09 pm
er, utbay. Love trying to type with a wrist brace on.
PapaHotNuts | June 2, 2006 at 4:09 pm
I asked him for a ring, and he gave me The Ring Two, which wasn’t nearly as good as the first.
Seneca Fell | June 2, 2006 at 4:12 pm
#36, nice job.
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | June 2, 2006 at 4:16 pm
I asked Colin Farrell to stop fucking my sister because I knew he had the AIDS, and he hit me over the head with a bottle of Jameson, which by proxy caused my ears to ring.
Wild Rose | June 2, 2006 at 4:17 pm
Fresh story, fresh jokes…enthusiastic applause!
pinky_nip | June 2, 2006 at 4:19 pm
@44: It’s hard to type with one hand in your pants.
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | June 2, 2006 at 4:25 pm
I think Colin Farrell is married to the mob, and of course I mean the mob of sluts that follows him around wherever he goes leaving a trail of cooze like some big, sweaty, whore-slug.