Cindy Crawford at Roberto Cavalli Vodka launch

May 12th, 2006 // 273 Comments

I don’t know what’s happening to Cindy Crawford but I’m blaming it on global warming. She used to be a crazy hot supermodel but now she looks like she’s getting ready for a sex change. And it’s not like these are candid shots of her right after working out or doing construction or something. This is on a red carpet, where she knew she’d be photographed. She’s got no makeup on, her eyebrows are out of control, and her once famous beauty spot just looks like concentrated cancer now. The only other explanation I can think of is that she caught an ugly-disease from posing with homeless people. I guess we’ll be lucky if her damn eye doesn’t fall out.


  1. Feed_Me_Chocolate

    Uh, first? What’s up with her eyebrows and the eyeblinding shine?

  2. El Campo



  3. GottaLuvMe

    I always thought she looked like Ashton Kutcher in drag.

  4. Feed_Me_Chocolate

    And this guy is wrong-she is wearing makeup–but apparently not enough.

  5. GottaLuvMe

    or Kurthcher..whatever

  6. Feed_Me_Chocolate

    Dream on, El Campo.

  7. CoJo

    Okay – looking a little like a young Janice Dickinson here, but for her age and considering that children have come out of that belly, Cindy is still a hotass mama.

  8. El Campo

    I WAS FIRST! And then it said I had to sign in =[

  9. Dr.Rokter

    I had a vodka launch once. But it was Jenkins, and it took place in my girlfriend’s sink.

  10. laneysmom

    First post for me, damnit I would have been first if registration didn’t take for freaking ever. Anyways, what’s up with her looking like a less-scary younger Janice Dickinson??

  11. ellaminnowpea

    I remember my 1st grade teacher wearing that bright orange rouge….and she had pink bi-focals, too….

  12. PapaHotNuts

    I would still stick my thumb in her butt.

  13. GottaLuvMe

    maybe she took more then 5 minutes to apply her make up she’d do a much better job.

  14. Italian Stallion

    So when does she get to kiss Ryan Seacrest?

  15. Geno

    Please. She is a great looking woman. End of story.

  16. Binky

    That last picture is familiar.
    I hate it when women take a good tape measure – shred it, and then make a belt out it.
    It’s usually a sign of things to come…and not in a good way…

  17. ellaminnowpea

    stuck in his thumb and pulled out a plum and said, “what a good boy am I” …. sorry, I was reminiscing about that gramma I had for a 1st grade teacher….

  18. thatsmyname

    Apart from the mole, she doesnt look bad at all. Perhaps she should have it removed now.

  19. MiamiGoldenPantherr


  20. Znuffy

    I work in her hometown and she occassionally visits. I’ve never seen her and hope I don’t. The glare from that shine could cause blindness!

  21. mw

    You guys are crazy she looks great. The mole is looking a bit nasty though, I’ll give you that.

  22. I’m perplexed by the assertion that she’s not wearing makeup. She’s very clearly wearing lipstick, blush, and eye makeup.

  23. MissFit

    Yup she is definately looking hagged, um (shudders) i dont even know what to say.

  24. waterranger

    Her outfit looks as though she just threw on a brown leather jacket over top of her gardening clothes.

  25. BlackQueen

    Whoever wrote this article is a damn fool. Sometimes out of shear boredom I go this website, and I really think that some folks have real issues. Particularly white people. I am not racist, all I am saying is that white culture seems to have real issues with aging. That is extremely pitiful because it is one of lifes natural progressions. Cindy Crawford looks good for her age, she is no longer in her 20′s, and it is good she is not caking on the make up. White culture is truly wacked out in its perception of beauty, not only when it comes to other racial groups, but when it comes to their own women. Pitiful.

  26. WTF

    I never thought the skank was THAT good looking back in the day….yea she had nice legs..but that mole is taking over her face!

  27. race1

    Please, she is still a beautiful woman. You all are being hypercritical, for no reason.

    I’m typing this, and to my Right is an add for “the New York Times”, with an unpleasant pic of JayZ, with a baseball cap, somehow perched, sideways on his dome.

    JayZ, nearly made me loose breakfast.

    Cindy, no, sorry she is still a great looking lady.

  28. The Portuguese Girl

    she’s wearing make up…and she’s a good looking woman.
    don’t be so mean dude =P

  29. Spacedog

    I’m telling you: she got that lip growth by touching that homeless dude in the wheelchair.
    Watch it metastasize before your eyes!

  30. WTF

    and BlackQueen…the Black culture, especially the women DO care about aging ALOT..just look at Micheal Jackson. That is one UGLY ASS black woman!

  31. Cindy was never that hot. She was just marketed well. She kept her coke binges out of the paper by staying on the bus. She never went tacky blonde.

    I think the point that is being missed is that she’s about 50 now. So for a 50 year old, she’s definitely bangable.

  32. andrewthezeppo

    Um she’s looks fine for a retired model and mother of two. Also, she didn’t drink the vodka and flash a bunch of people or fall down….so why is this a story? Our vodka launchs international media events now?

    booooo superficially booooouuuurrns

  33. PapaHotNuts

    @ 25
    “Particularly white people. I am not racist, all I am saying is that white culture seems to have real issues with aging.”

    If you have to state that you’re not a racist, you probably are.

    “Particularly black people. I am not racist, all I am saying is that black culture seems to have real issues with working.”

  34. Aimless

    All I can say is, when I’m her age, I hope I look as good as she does. Go on, Cindy!

  35. Land-Man

    BlackQueen weighs like 300 lbs. and has 8 kids on welfare. Stop having kids!

    I would still give it to Cindy out of nostalgia. I grew up Land-Whacking to her.

  36. Dr.Rokter


    It’s not hate. It’s biological imperative. Women who are no longer of breedable age shrivel up and become sexually unattractive to everyone. We used to live shorter lifespans, and lived in societies where dried-up, withered hags were thrown ceremoniously onto sharp stakes or fed to wild animals to appease angry, youthful gods. Sadly, black or white, we have forgotten our roots. It’s true, it’s not Cindy’s fault we’ve all let her live this long.

  37. Feed_Me_Chocolate

    Papa! Touche!

  38. WTF


    Black People = issues with crime and working

    White People = issues with crime (eating ppl, serial killing) and inferiority complex

    Mexican People = issues with diapers and working

    SandMonkeys People = issues with bombs and false Gods

    Asian People = issues with driving and small penises’

  39. PapaHotNuts

    @ 38
    Exactly. But I live in Baton Rouge, and we actually had a black serial killer a couple of years ago. First they took over golf, now they’re starting to serial kill. Thank God for water polo.

  40. I thought as a white male I had a superiority complex, not an inferiority.

  41. Feed_Me_Chocolate

    Maybe the only reason black women don’t have aging issues (if that’s true at all), is that black people generally age really well, and that’s because they have oily skin that keeps them from drying out and wrinkling.
    I once met a black lady who looked to be in her mid to late 30′s, and she mentioned that she had a 30-year old son, and I was like, WTF? She was in her 50′s, and totally didn’t look it. Look at Denzel. He’s what, in his 50′s too, and he’s barely changed. Actually, his wife looks older than him.

  42. She’s trying to rip Jessica’s orange-ade look with those cheeks… whoever did them needs to be fired.

  43. WTF

    I think no matter what race….men age better than women in the long run. But women sure do age us MENTALLY quick…bitches!

  44. Land-Man

    Black people age well because of the high antioxidant content of fried chicken and watermelon.

  45. Italian Stallion

    @25 Sometimes out of shear boredom I go this website too, and I always think I was only one, now I better feel………….

  46. K_Fed'sScumstache


  47. Fisher55

    41: um, Denzel looks like he fell out of a bus lately.

    and i think you are getting your stereotypes confused. while black men have naturally muscular physiques, it’s asians that age well (but that’s only because they rub their skin with ground up pearls). or it could be the new Asian salad from McDonald’s, over there>>>>

  48. Aimtrue

    i’m sorry, but I’ld trade up from my present status for that anytime. Still hot, maybe lost a little, but still has the tent pole lifting the big top

  49. lolpop

    #31 is right she was never “hot” and hardly that beautiful. And, she is wearing makeup, dumbass, just the wrong kind esp orangey blush.

  50. bethiecow

    She looks tired, she’s been tanning too much, and she’s wearing too much blush that’s the wrong shade for her. Otherwise, she doesn’t look half bad.

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