Chuck Norris hates people thinking he’s badass

December 24th, 2007 // 51 Comments

Chuck Norris sued the publishers of a book that collects all the “mythical facts” about him from the Internet. The book The Truth about Chuck Norris was compiled by Ian Spector who started the popular website about Chuck Norris. He’s also named in the suit which was filed on Friday. The Associated Press reports:

“Some of the ‘facts’ in the book are racist, lewd or portray Mr. Norris as engaged in illegal activities,” the lawsuit alleges.
Norris, who rose to fame in the 1970s and 1980s as the star of such films as “The Delta Force” and “Missing in Action,” says the book’s title would mislead readers into thinking the facts were true.

I’ve always wanted to try one of these. Here goes: “Chuck Norris pees sitting down.” I did it! I’m the winner!

Photo: Getty Images
superficial

  1. samechick

    Chuck’s feigning modesty. He can cure cancer with his tears! I know it’s true because I read it on the internet.

  2. lamuella

    They could just change the title of the book to “The ‘truth’ about Chuck Norris”

  3. frank_the_dolphin

    I hope the guy he is suing has double life insurance. Chuck Norris once killed a man with his thoughts.

  4. *Selamat Hari Natal*
    *Merry Christmas*
    *????*

  5. Gez

    I have one:
    “Chuck norris doesn’t need plastic surgery. It only takes a tough look of him and the reality as we know it deflates around his face and his skin looks tigher”.

  6. Gez

    …and his skin looks tighter”.

  7. Superbad

    more vanessa. less chuck…

    damn she’s hot and cute… she better be at the club in new year’s

  8. isitin

    #6, I guess you like hairy women with sideburns……..

  9. Superbad

    do you know what will be the opening statement of Chuck Norris in court?

    a roundhouse kick to the judge’s face….case closed.

  10. isitin

    Sorry #6, I meant #7………………

  11. Superbad

    #10 you can guess what you want…to me, vanessa is hot ..should be wild in bed as well..

  12. Rocko Solido

    Weird, I remember at the height of the annoying Chuck Norris Facts craze, good ol’ Chuck actually commented on it on his own website claiming that some were funny but he wasn’t fond of the ones that references him as Jesus being that he’s Christian/Catholic.

  13. THE MAN IS JUST HORNY. Even at his age that is possible!!
    THAT’S ALL FOLKS!!

  14. maximmm

    Hmm… I suppose it’s one thing if people post them on Internet, but a rather different one if people try to profit from using his name.

    Then again, paparazzi do this all the time and get away with it…

  15. Missystar

    What on earth is wrong with his face? And why is that bimbo’s hand right by his crotch?

  16. Everyone can think I’m a badass instead.

  17. Marc

    She: “Chuck, you’re the best.”

    Chuck: “I know…”

  18. tommygun

    Dude, you messed with Chuck. You are done. He will come for you. heheheheh

  19. croatiansensation

    why are you people talking about that teeny pop tart on the chuck norris comments area? wild in bed? you’ve probably never touched a boob in your life. go jack it in silence we don’t need to read it in every section.

  20. FreakyTexan

    I heard that if you say his name three times while looking in a mirror, that like, nothing happens.

  21. s0fa

    yeah but he also said awhile ago that he thought some of them were funny. so whatever

  22. Ript1&0

    Look at how high he is.

  23. Gabriel

    Rodney King asked if we could all just get a long.

    Too bad Chuck Norris already had a long.

  24. His toupee is badass.

  25. Bouffin

    Chuck Norris sits down when he pees?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Li_OpJiQf_s

  26. Bouffin

    Chuck Norris sits down when he pees?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Li_OpJiQf_s

  27. me

    He’s 67 and still not one gray hair on his head.

  28. engel

    He is terrible.I am sure that people are interested in this news. Do you know so many people gave their own view at pubspa.com.

  29. Gabriel

    Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a toupee, he wears the hair of someone he scalped.

  30. helley

    C N is a great man .He is great, I think.BTW, someone saw his profile with hot & sexy photos on “WealthyKiss.com”, a dating site for celebrities and millionaires. It seems the profile looks sincere and attractive. Maybe even clebs feel lonely and lost sometimes. They also need love and fun. hehe.. Maybe sometimes they really need a soul mate rather than a rich buddy.

  31. Gabriel

    Chuck Norris doesn’t need a soul mate. He mated with all of Seoul.

  32. D. Richards (Scum.)

    Goddamn. What an elderly man with no sense-of humor ol’ Chucky’s turned out to be. I’ve been to that site. Most of those sayings are hilarious; they’re all in good fun. Take a joke, karate-guy.

    Oh yeah. Chuck Norris was born in 1940. He’s almost seventy. Yes. He’s become the neighborhood old guy that lost his youth. I saw a photo of Norris with Presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee. God help us. Norris must be a conservative christian doushe-bag. Hanging out with a fucking baptist preacher. Fuck you Norris.

  33. Uncle Eccoli

    Good for you, Chuck, I’d sue the bastards, too. All of this was done without his consent. Shameful.

  34. Cool guy

    noooo leave chuck aloneeeeeee

  35. Gabriel

    Call girls call Chuck Norris.

  36. Gabriel

    Chuck Norris’s ear bit Mike Tyson.

  37. D. Richards (Comedian.)

    The Romans didn’t crucify Jesus. Chuck Norris ordered Christ to nail himself to the wood, and he did.

    But Chuck felt bad. For Jesus was the man that trained him to kill thousands of vietnamese; they became close. Like brothers. So with a cross-bow, Chuck Norris fired a single arrow that pierced Jesus’s heart.

    Then Chuck fucked a bunch of jewish ‘broads’, as he says.

  38. jaosn

    do you know what will be the opening statement of Chuck Norris in court?

    a roundhouse kick to the judge’s face….case closed.

  39. jaosn

    do you know what will be the opening statement of Chuck Norris in court?

    a roundhouse kick to the judge’s face….case closed.

  40. jaosn

    do you know what will be the opening statement of Chuck Norris in court?

    a roundhouse kick to the judge’s face….case closed.

  41. jaosn

    do you know what will be the opening statement of Chuck Norris in court?

    a roundhouse kick to the judge’s face….case closed.

  42. c0nfuzi

    chuck norris fact: chuck is old as fuck.

  43. NunoH

    Chuck should get a sense of humor and new pants/belt combination.

  44. WOOWOOOW. IT’S not the time for them to have sex, the woman acts like a bitch, really she is,,. Gals at PinkMingle.com have seen her hook with another man on the LONDON street…. courious….LOL

  45. busy

    chuck norris can slam a revolving door

  46. woodhorse

    Public humiliation is too good for Chuck “pwned by Bruce Lee and riding the downward wake ever since” Norris. After he actually made some money, he dumped his wife of several years for a newer model and to make it seem less so-typical-and-tawdry, they got themselves hitched by a holy roller fraud named “Buster” Kennedy (the preacher now prefers Lawrence but I prefer Buster as that reflects his true nature) who did time in the pen for beating a man to death with a fence post and then became a preacher while in prison. Local boy done good decided there was more money in preaching than beating people with a fence post – and more pussy as well. So you can judge Chuck Norris by the company he keeps as well. – this is not from a book, this is from knowing the people involved.

  47. funny

    Chuck Norris is so hott he made Rosie O Donnel straight

  48. Uncle Milte

    The reason I know this story is false is because Chuck Norris doesn’t file lawsuits. Congress simply changes the laws based on Chuck’s desires. Every Congressman votes “Yea”, or else.

  49. King

    He’s about to punch that bitch in the face!

  50. “Long Before Chuck Norris Put the “Laughter” into Manslaughter, He Was Putting the “Pro” into Propaganda.”

    http://mightyminnow.wordpress.com/2007/12/19/before-chuck-norris-put-the-laughter-in-manslaughter-he-was-putting-the-pro-in-propaganda/

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