Christina Hendricks is an ample bride

October 12th, 2009 // 79 Comments

Christina Hendricks wed her boyfriend of only a few months Geoffrey Arend on Saturday in New York, according to People. Now, I’m not the marrying type, but if I ever decided to sign my own death sentence, those are exactly what I want to see bounding down the aisle towards me. I’m pretty sure Geoffrey stood at the altar and thought about all the things he’d do to those bad boys, but not before taking the time to pat himself on the back for the most successful blackmail scheme of all time. It seems like only yesterday he came across her drowning that baby.

Photos: Flynet, Getty

  1. Kick


  2. Kick


  3. Farva's Number 1!!!

    The schnozzberries taste like schnozzberries!!!

  4. akb


  5. mimi

    SUPERFISH is posting FIRST himself now because this site is dead.

  6. Police

    You ARE freaking out. Man.

  7. Liz

    Diggity-DAMN! THAT’s what a woman looks like.

    And yes, I believe she did marry the “Schnozzberries” guy from “Super Troopers” Lucky bastard.

  8. lies

    geoffrey and christina were dating for almost two years when they got engaged in december 2008. suck on that, people.

  9. shemp

    va Va VOOM!!!

  10. DoFakeTitsTasteLikePlasticOrPumpkins?

    Why do so many girls get fake tits? Someday she’ll be a krinkly old grand lady with a plastic rack still as shiny new as the day she bought them. Do you suppose babies breast fed off plastic tits have a higher probability of starving to death?

  11. nixy

    what is up with her bridesmaid dress? it has nipple accents on it. classy

  12. nixy

    what is up with her bridesmaid dress? it has nipple accents on it. classy

  13. julia

    in the third and tenth photo she looks like a huge-breasted leighton meester (no pun intended)!

  14. Luna

    They’re not fake. They’re real and they’re spectacular.

  15. HOLY SHIT. one of the hottest women on the planet married the guy who says “I’m freakin out, man!” on Super Troopers!???? what. the. fuck?

    he must be hung like a rodeo clown.

  16. Average at best, fake rack

    Real breasts? Look you basement dwellers, real breasts aren’t perfectly rounded at the top like these are. The guy is a schlub. Lucky any woman would date, let alone marry him.

  17. Joe

    Did she also get a hip-job? An ass-job?

  18. bribios

    @ Kick.

    No, you are not first. Obviously Geoffrey Arend is first.

  19. bribios

    Those are her natural boobs. That is not, however, her natural hair color. She’s really a blonde.

  20. Christopher

    #17: they are when they’re shqueezed into a corset, for the record.

    But I tells ya, she’s a hotty but her face in that last pic almost annihilates every time I’ve looked at her assets and drooled inside…

  21. Aly

    @ 17. She’s got them pushed up, of course they’re going to look like that. They are her REAL breasts. Christina’s a size 12. She’s a big girl with big breasts.

  22. Dude

    Those are not very flattering pictures of her. She looks pretty plastic in the first with her dad.

    But, seriously, dem is some big ass titties!

  23. ha

    She’s beautiful. There’s no way around that.

  24. Pro

    Haha When the f*$k did we get icecream!!!!!!

  25. Lol at 17

    Hahah #17, my virgin alarm is sounding.

  26. Deus

    Wait, i cant seem to find her husband, is that old fugly fart? OMG Christina, wake the fuck up, you so got hexed or something

  27. Deus

    #14, omg you are so right! damn best pics evar!

  28. testington

    She is sooooooooooooo sexy way too hot to be a bride

  29. 17=jealous

    “17. Average at best, fake rack – October 12, 2009 3:55 PM

    Real breasts? Look you basement dwellers, real breasts aren’t perfectly rounded at the top like these are. The guy is a schlub. Lucky any woman would date, let alone marry him.”

    Idiot. A)They’re real…..the fact you cant seem to accept that shows how little *your* pathetic ass gets out of the basement (although I’m sure you’ve popped in and out of the closet a few times) And that ‘schlub’ apparently pulls far more ass in a week than you will in your pathetic life. Jealous much? We know, we know- you’re Adonis reincarnate……give or take a fat ass and a nub for a penis.

  30. #17 is spot on

    Several board certified surgeons have commented this woman has undergone breast enhancement. I’m in agreement with #17, fake rack.

    #30, are you this womans father? That basement comment seems to have touched a nerve in you. Maybe YOU should get out more.

  31. Quick summary

    She’s pretty. He’s hideous. I have no idea who these people are. Why do hot chicks always feel compelled to “marry down”? You’re hot. Date someone at your own hotness level.

  32. Tanzarian

    Flipper Boy, HAH!

  33. D-listers

    WHO and WHO got married now?

  34. Kick

    @ 19, if you think Geoffrey was actually first to tap that, you’re sadly mistaken.

  35. ss

    My friend told a me a hot dating place ___d i a m o n d s i n g l e . c o m___where you have the opportunity to make friends and chat with a millionaire or hot girl ,supermodels and so on..First i can’t believe,then i sign up there.I found celebrities’ profile with sexy photos and newest blogs there. you can know more about them. By the way I really got many friends including’s so exciting.

  36. te

    This woman is butt fuking ugly. if it wasn’t for her huge tits she would be a nobody.

  37. Seishi

    Wasn’t she married to Malcom Reynolds?

  38. Brooke

    She was married to the Captain, it didn’t last.

  39. Pretty fake

    I have a big natural rack myself, I’m a 36 DD – and they don’t look spherical, even in a corset. They look plump and round, but you don’t have that kind of separation in between and also between the collar bone and the breast. It’s a boob job, and a pretty good one that’s proportionate with the rest of her. She’s really beautiful, too!

  40. Turd the third

    My god, who did her makeup? In half of the picts she looks like she is a mannequin in Madame Tussauds wax museum.

    Big puppies but they don’t look right on her,, think the dress isn’t helping very much.

  41. Lincoln

    #41, Dude, you’re not even a chick. If you were, you’d know that not all breasts behave the same way, clothed or unclothed.

    I vote for real for the simple reason that, based on interviews I’ve seen her in and her actual talent for acting, she’s too smart to, if she were to go the fake breasts route, overdo it. Which, if those were fake, they’d be. Overdone, that is.

  42. Heather

    He’s so ugly… :(
    What a shame. I love her.
    **And comments about her boobs. They looks pretty real to me.

  43. she really does look stunning with her milky complexion and red hair, she makes a lovely bride

  44. Congrats

    She is really pretty. A nice smile and eyes. Probably a nice person. Hope they are happy. Stunning in her dress on this special occasion.

  45. farles chew

    For the record, anyone who thinks Christina Hendricks had a boob job is an idiot; she’s been built like that since she was a gothy teen here in Fairfax.

    • Laura T

      For the record, I am not an idiot and I think she did have a boob job. I’m a size 36 G (almost H) and mine are too heavy (because of all the tissue) to ever be anywhere near my clavicle. So, unless she has the shortest torso to body ratio in human history, they’re fakes!

  46. Fiona

    I always thought her breasts were natural but now I’m not convinced. Just did a little test at home on my 32E’s (I’m sure Mr Fish would love to be the test controller) and I can’t get them looking rounded at the top like that. I’ve tried to push them up as high as possible but they still don’t look like that round – if anything they start to fold back onto my chest (not attractive but true).

    Personally I think they look silly anyway, I mean this is her wedding day – why does she want to look so cheap?!

    Never mind, still love her, she’s a great actress and they are a damn good job but they are just that – a boob job.

  47. Darth

    This is quite a voluptuous redhead.

  48. Galtacticus

    Boob job or not,they are very much in line with her hips.

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