Christina Aguilera wants more babies (Read: Behemoth breasts here to stay)

June 3rd, 2008 // 82 Comments

Christina Aguilera is ready for Baby #2 and plans to turn her uterus into a Sasquatch distribution center, according to The Sun:

When asked if she wants more babies, Christina replied: “Yes, absolutely. Absolutely! Motherhood comes very naturally to me. I think a whole new confidence comes with being a mother. I feel very confident and very sexy as a mother.”

And it’s official: Jordan Bratman’s penis shoots not only sperm but diamond-crusted solid gold bars that also function as a Wii. Ha ha! I knew it! Who’s the crazy one now, field of medicine?

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Comments (82)

  1. havoc | June 3, 2008 at 2:28 pm

    Them’s some tig ole bitties!

    .

    Reply
  2. JimmyBachaFungool | June 3, 2008 at 2:32 pm

    I never cared for her until she had the baby and her body filled out. I’d lick her feet after she walked her pee pee.

    Reply
  3. Bigheadmike | June 3, 2008 at 2:33 pm

    Oh Yes!!!!!!!!!

    Reply
  4. Holy Hellmans | June 3, 2008 at 2:35 pm

    Jordan Bratman is probably hung like a Sasquatch. Or John Mayer. Or Me. That is the only explanation for Aguilera to marry and have sex with someone who looks like the offspring of a Mon Chi Chi and Walter Mathau.

    Reply
  5. FRIST!!! | June 3, 2008 at 2:37 pm

    #4 can I get your phone number??

    Reply
  6. Niptuck... | June 3, 2008 at 2:37 pm

    Why is this website pretending that she didn’t get those huge ass implants bolted on post-pregnancy? Are we in denial on this site now?

    Reply
  7. Jumpin_J | June 3, 2008 at 2:39 pm

    I’ll say it again because it never gets old… YAAAAY BOOOOBZ!!!!

    (though if she gets any more Botox it’ll be more than just her booobz that won’t move)

    Reply
  8. Forrest Fordutreese | June 3, 2008 at 2:40 pm

    Where is their baby?

    Reply
  9. aja | June 3, 2008 at 2:41 pm

    Think of how sexy her enormous crusty gummed out salami blotchy purple nipples are…and the stretch marks too!

    I bet her tits sag to her belly when the bra comes off. If they don’t now…give it until she stops breastfeeding and they deflate and die.

    Reply
  10. hacksaw | June 3, 2008 at 2:44 pm

    I’d hit it.

    Reply
  11. IMPLANTS | June 3, 2008 at 2:49 pm

    IMPLANTS!!! She just wants to preggs again because her boobs grew without the help of a surgeon during her pregnancy. Those GIANT boobs you see are made up of 3 things; small a-b cup natural boobs, a silicone shell and breast milk. Fat, silicone, and milk. YUMMY… *vomits*

    Reply
  12. Auntie Kryst | June 3, 2008 at 2:52 pm

    Their kids and its future siblings are so lucky. They get to celebrate Christmas AND Hanukkah..

    Reply
  13. JKR | June 3, 2008 at 2:53 pm

    I hate how she acts like her boobs just magically grew because she got pregnant. Give me a fuckin break!!! Your boobs do not grow 4 cup sizes overnight because you have a fucking baby in your stomach. Once you start breastfeeding, they should go down like pancakes. But of course hers are still perfectly perky. GIVE ME A BREAK! Just admit it stankuilera…. YOU GOT A BOOBJOB!

    Reply
  14. snarky | June 3, 2008 at 3:06 pm

    she’s so tacky and disgusting. and why doesn’t she cover up that ugly fake rack of hers once in a while; I’m so sick of seeing it out on display! she must really think everyone thinks her nasty purple veiny barney boobed bust is hot; blech!

    Reply
  15. deacon jones | June 3, 2008 at 3:08 pm

    Wait a second! Her Jewish husband looks like a Jew..

    1. Short in height, physically weak….check
    2. Small, beady eyes, big nose, lips and ears….check
    3. Self-loathing expression….check!

    Reply
  16. Harley Quinn | June 3, 2008 at 3:10 pm

    coming from the mom who schedules when she would like a csetion so her vagina doesn’t get abnormally bigger then it already is

    Reply
  17. Elliot_Spitz_On_Her | June 3, 2008 at 3:11 pm

    He always looks like he has gas.

    Reply
  18. eh | June 3, 2008 at 3:18 pm

    some people like me are lucky i have great size boobs after having my baby yeah they look like hers and mine stayed liked that i was dd be4 baby e while with baby huge while feeding baby, as long as u keep feeding and the milk comes in they keep shame and stay nice. min are still great and i dont have strech marks or purple nipples i have nice pinkish nipples. so just because u say this or u know some one or most people are like….that doesnt mean for every one.

    she looks great with or with out help of a knife

    but he is one ugly mo fo and i wonder what he does to keep her

    Reply
  19. gerard Vandenberg | June 3, 2008 at 3:20 pm

    This woman appears to be the ROLE-MODEL to our dutch PROSTITUTES!!

    Reply
  20. PROOF OF IMPLANTS | June 3, 2008 at 3:24 pm

    Here is more proof of undeniable implants. She got implants a few years back, she got preg and they got even bigger end of story.

    Click my name for Christina’s 100% obvious implants.

    Reply
  21. Randal | June 3, 2008 at 3:25 pm

    This is certainly good news and not because her natural breasts will remain their current size but rather, because she’s a good person and a good mother.

    Her children will be raised in a loving and musical enviornment, which may certainly spawn some new Aguilera’s for the music industry.

    One is never enough.

    Randal

    Reply
  22. Amber Richardson | June 3, 2008 at 3:26 pm

    18 Hey girl! I wit u on the commints. My titties still look good. This XTina story funny cuz I want another baby too.

    http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33652

    Reply
  23. Ted Mosby | June 3, 2008 at 3:27 pm

    She looks great but imagine her with natural breasts.

    Reply
  24. Conscience_Found | June 3, 2008 at 3:34 pm

    The cans are great but her nose appears to be made out of Silly Putty.

    Reply
  25. Ted from LA | June 3, 2008 at 3:53 pm

    Mrs. Potato Head.

    Reply
  26. Harley Quinn | June 3, 2008 at 4:03 pm

    TO 18.

    Well hun since you are bragging so much about your great breast, do you mind posting a link of some sort for us to view them?

    It would be a nice treat

    Reply
  27. slushy | June 3, 2008 at 4:11 pm

    Looking at her is hotter that looking at porn!

    Reply
  28. Jennifer Hammond | June 3, 2008 at 4:28 pm

    #18, my breasts were a B cup before baby,after pregnancy I now have D cup. So many women keep bigger breasts after having a child like you and I, but come on, Christina’s rack is obviously fake. And she goes around acting like her milk jugs are the sexiest most natural things in the world. Take a look at her when her career first started, she was barely a B cup if that, then after her Dirrrty era, they magically grew . They look hard fake and gross. Why cant she just admit they are fake? She thinks she is so great, her C section was very vain and she cared more about her va jay jay being stretched out and her husband leaving her for a tighter hole than the safety and health of her baby. She is not that hot, she looks ridiculous with that nasty fake bleached hair and orange skin. I cant stand the rat nosed bitch.

    Reply
  29. I hate her more than any other celeb | June 3, 2008 at 4:29 pm

    she is an ugly rat-faced piece of scum. Why is she so disgusting and obnoxious. She reminds me way to much of drag queens that decide to change their sex… only not as sweet and desperate to be accepted by society…. for some reason she feels her freaky, uneducated, trampy, crooked lookin self is better than everyone.

    Reply
  30. I hate her more than any other celeb | June 3, 2008 at 4:35 pm

    wow. I swear I am not number 28, but we kind of think a like… but I thought she admited to the breast implants during her stripped tour. A portion of the tour was post poned due to her plastic surgery.

    Reply
  31. Father of the Smear | June 3, 2008 at 4:38 pm

    #15 you forgot

    4. 10x richer and more successfull than me with a hot big titted wife…check!

    Reply
  32. VA Jayt Jay | June 3, 2008 at 4:40 pm

    EVERYONE CLICK ON # 20 NAME THE PIC SPEAKS FOR ITS SELF!!!!!!

    Reply
  33. well | June 3, 2008 at 4:42 pm

    big tits. if thats all it takes to be a prize, surely dog the bounty hunter is more blessed than jordan bratman.

    Reply
  34. tiffany | June 3, 2008 at 4:55 pm

    Why? She can’t even stay out home with the baby she already has! And on top of it, she needs to go home and wash her face! And those boobs are disgusting and were fake to begin with, so that is just enhanced silicone right there! Throw away the flourescent makeup and be natural! Stop looking like a hooker and respect yourself Xtina. Looking like a tramp doesn’t make you sexy. So stop trying!

    Reply
  35. Trover | June 3, 2008 at 5:05 pm

    This chick sucked off Carson Daley and Fred Durst at MTV studios and started a fight over it. I mean, classy. Glad to see she hasn’t changed. She just added more trashy to her collection is all.

    Reply
  36. Casey | June 3, 2008 at 5:28 pm

    Yeah, because she already spends so much time with the kid she has now.

    Reply
  37. Sofia | June 3, 2008 at 5:41 pm

    Hi looks like a normal dude… what does he see in her?? She’s like a really bad sex doll (one with an annoying voice!!)

    Reply
  38. VANITY | June 3, 2008 at 5:55 pm

    Oh I just love these vain bitch celebs and by love I mean HATE like a bastard. No matter what question they are asked they find a way to make it about how so called attractive or sexy they are or somehow about themselves, their ego’s need constant stroking, it’s pathetic.

    Hey Xtina do you want more children?
    Of course motherhood makes me feel so sexy.

    Hey Alba how do you like being pregnant?
    I love it my face is so full I look like a 16 year old again. (she said that)

    All the guy who got Megan Fox to say she wants to have sex 24/7 and never leave the house asked her was if she was having a nice evening.

    TRUE STORIES.

    These bitches cannot speak one sentence without complimenting themselves and EVERYTHING somehow related back to themselves “I’m voting for sure because being informed makes me feel sexy”. “I’m working on a new album and it’s going to be so sexy”, “I’m in a new movie and I play this super sexy woman” “I’m going to the bathroom because relieving myself makes me feel sexy”. FUCKING GET OVER YOURSELVES YOU VILE WHORES.

    Reply
  39. SASQUATCH | June 3, 2008 at 6:02 pm

    A sasquatch distribution centre LOL, you mean she’s making the mascots for the Vancouver 2010 Olympics, awww that’s nice of her way to support the athletes skank.

    Seriously one of the mascots for the 2010 Olympics is a sasquatch called Quatchi. I hear he was designed after Xtina’s hubby, but they actually made the mascot cute as to not scare the kids, the same thing could not be accomplished with Bratman for the sake of Xtina’s poor child. The plastic surgeons who tried are still in mental institutions screaming “make it go away”.

    Click my name to see the little sasquatch mascot.

    Reply
  40. cookie | June 3, 2008 at 6:06 pm

    It’s amazing she has any time left over for that kid , with the hours she must spend on her makeup alone .She looks like a tranny

    Reply
  41. LL | June 3, 2008 at 6:25 pm

    She looks like a clown hooker. Or a hooker clown. Not sure how that goes, exactly.

    And I also love how celebrities talk about how “confident” they feel after having a kid. You know how regular (ie, most people, who can’t afford nannies) chicks feel after having a kid? Tired.

    Also, why do celebrities (well, it’s not only celebrities, but they do say it a lot) think that being “confident” is some super duper accomplishment? If I thought most celebrities were capable of it, I’d think they deliberately come up with dumbfuck answers to the dumbfuck questions they get asked just to amuse themselves.

    Reply
  42. titz | June 3, 2008 at 6:37 pm

    i grew 2 cup sizes with pregnancy and I am a skinny lanky BIATCH, just like she was. those ain’t implants. although once she stops breastfeeding, they may turn in to flapjacks :(

    Reply
  43. titz | June 3, 2008 at 6:37 pm

    i grew 2 cup sizes with pregnancy and I am a skinny lanky BIATCH, just like she was. those ain’t implants. although once she stops breastfeeding, they may turn in to flapjacks :(

    Reply
  44. butterfly | June 3, 2008 at 7:44 pm

    I just don’t like her very much. She comes off as such a snooty biotch. She’s like 1/3 woman, 1/3 clown & 1/3 scarecrow.

    Even with her bad attitude & scary appearance, the girl can SING. I just wish we could only HEAR from her and not have to SEE her.

    Reply
  45. Grumpus | June 3, 2008 at 8:36 pm

    “I feel so sexy as a mother.” Or whatever she said. I’m not scrolling back up!

    What a great reason to breed.

    Reply
  46. Grumpus | June 3, 2008 at 8:37 pm

    “I feel so sexy as a mother.” Or whatever she said. I’m not scrolling back up!

    What a great reason to breed.

    Reply
  47. my comment | June 3, 2008 at 8:38 pm

    Look at their outfits. Imagine they are your parents.

    His t-shirt with a rabbit on it. Her leggings, blue pumps and leopard bra. Not to mention the screaming pink lipstick, orange skin and neon yellow hair.

    I like Christina. I think she’s cute, implants and all. But darling, ditch your stylist please!

    Reply
  48. liz | June 3, 2008 at 9:06 pm

    i have the same bra as her :)
    from victoria secrettt
    just noticed that haha

    Reply
  49. not hot tranny | June 3, 2008 at 9:13 pm

    SHUT UP ASSHOLES SHE’S REALLY HOT YOU’RE JUST JELOUS CAUSE YOU ALL ARE FAT AND UGLY

    Reply
  50. 1hotmama | June 3, 2008 at 9:30 pm

    i think that she is a bad mother leaving her baby at home while she gets her drink and party on that just amazes me i have a 5 month old and i love him so much and i could never just leave him to go out to a club i dont think she should have anymore kids

    Reply

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