Christina Aguilera is probably pregnant

June 8th, 2007 // 163 Comments
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In non-Paris Hilton related news, Christina Aguilera and Jordan Bratman stopped by a maternity center yesterday, fueling rumors that Christina is pregnant. TMZ reports they stopped by New York’s Maternal Fetal Medicine Association, known for their expertise in high-risk pregnancies and state-of-the-art ultrasounds.

Notice that Christina Aguilera is covering up her stomach in every single shot here. Also notice that she looks pissed as hell. Which doesn’t make any sense, because the father of her baby is so incredibly good looking. Oh, no, wait, that’s a mirror. Man, look at him. They’ll be lucky if this kid isn’t born with hamburger meat for a face. Or isn’t a damn Mr. Potato Head.

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superficial

  1. Chauncey Gardner

    So, basically, the kid is going to look like a ‘Christina Aguilera Special Edition Mrs. Potato Head.’

  2. wedge1

    Jeez – his sunglasses look like they’ve been Photoshopped onto his face. WTC?
    “His future’s so bright … he’s gotta wear shades.”

  3. Jordan

    She sure looks it!

  4. So that’s why she looks like a hooker … pregnant hooker … that is just depressing.

  5. Aerialgreen

    What could be on that starbucks bag? dare I say the Fetus that falle from her hoo-haw and they took it (safely in that bag) to see how to get it back inside?

  6. Hecubus

    Wow, Shane Macgowan got Christina Aguilera pregnant ??

  7. alicia

    I bet $20 the kid comes out looking like a friggin’ troll. Any takers?

  8. Maybe Britney saved some of her baby stuff for her. Like “Baby’s First Nascar Beer Cozy”, “Little Tramp Dress-up Kit”, and that timeless childhood classic book “Mom’s a Washed-up Pop Star.”

  9. Loversand Friends

    She looks so depressed because she saw in the ultrasound picture that her future baby looks just like her husband: horrible.

    All jokes aside, it says that the facility specializes in high-risk pregnancies. It might be that she just got some bad news about a possible pregnancy, and that’s why she looks so upset.

  10. sharpeidude

    Oy vey! He looks like a poor-man’s version of Ringo Starr. But worry not all you mush-brained Christina fans. Something as inconvenient as a little pregnancy won’t get in the way of her next whack ass tour. She’ll get a discrete abortion and then her meatbag publisist will say it was a miscarriage to cultivate sympathy for her no-talent ass!

  11. Sosad

    She’s sad because:
    1. She worked-out so much and will lose it.
    2. No more drinking/drugs
    3. She has to decide IF she wants to keep baby, ’cause she will be losing a lot of $ during the entire process. Mr Potatoe Head def wants the baby and he has a ‘say’ in this.
    4. She’s realizing there is more to this world then just her.

  12. lindsay

    wow a litlle dirrrty baby cant wait to see what it does for a living.

  13. Sosad

    Posted by Loversand Friends on June 8, 2007 5:59 PM
    “All jokes aside, it says that the facility specializes in high-risk pregnancies. It might be that she just got some bad news about a possible pregnancy, and that’s why she looks so upset.”

    ———–
    I would assume it would be a high-risk if she has decided to continue touring and the her exercise regime. But who knows?

  14. Chauncey Gardner

    Hey, maybe we should help the dynamic duo of Bratman and Bratwoman name their children.

    KUNG! POW!

    Honestly, I’d recommend ‘Brobin’. It’s unisex, and, let’s face it – you can’t have Bratman without a Brobin. Unless he wants his daughter to have a more identifiably feminine name, in which case I suggest ‘Bratgirl’.

    BAM! MARGERA!

    But, he’d better be careful, because if the relationship ends as bad as it has begun, Bratwoman could take him for half of everything he owns, and he may be forced to face off with the most evil of all villains – The Broker!

    KUM! SOCK!

    Will the Bratman? Find suitable names for his ugly children? Will the angry Bratwoman leave him? Find out next time – same Brat time, same Brat channel!

    Dud-dud-dud-dud-dud-dud-dud-DUD!
    Dud-dud-dud-dud-dud-dud-dud-DUD!

    BRATMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

  15. captain obvious

    Looks like the hormones are getting to her. Wonder if she’ll tone it down on the bleach now. And could she wear anymore makeup (espc powder)??!! She’s got beautiful skin, I don’t understand why she’s always smothering it! And that is gonna be one…interesting…looking kid.

  16. it's me fuckers

    http://www.dlisted.com/node/10983

    you have to check out this video… lol, it’s hot

  17. OMG I so called it! check the last christina posts!

  18. Gonzo

    The thing about Bratman that disturbs me is that he constantly looks miserable…

  19. Cdawg

    Gawd she’s got nice huge nipples on pic #6, imagine when she’s 8 months preggers hmmmmmm I’d SO hit it!

  20. WHAT THE FUCK
    IS WITH HER HAIR?
    damn…..

    juzt called the
    phone company..
    and a chick
    answered named:
    Mia..I about shit…
    it waz everything I
    could not to cuzz
    her out…!!!!!!!

    congratz kriz=tina..
    I think your too
    small to have a
    child…..

  21. That’s what I’m talking about, a little beaner…even though she is white, and that’s racist?

  22. I wonder what her face really looks like. Do you THINK she’s wearing enough makeup there?

  23. Christina’s pretty hot, and now that she got a decent stylist, even wears fairly nice clothes. Kid’s got a better chance than Brit’s kids.

  24. minnimeme

    pic #5: bust a move!

  25. She looks prettier here than she has in a long time.

  26. farty_mcshitface

    by the look on her face- I’d say she is definitely prego. she certainly has a look of sincere unhappiness like her days of having fun could be coming to an end. she don’t like the idea that her days of clubbing and drugs will be coming to an end.

    but, thats just tough shit for you christy!!, you fuck some guys and then all of a sudden, you are knocked up!- shit how in the hell is that possible? i always thought she was some nasty tranny who couldn’t possibly get preggo since (s)he never had a vadge- just a mutilated thunderstick like all those other transformers.

  27. woodhorse

    #7 If it does, Xtina is going to have a nasty case of road rash.

  28. Lord please don’t let the kid look like her goofy husband. She’s beautiful! We need more copies!

    http://www.innerdrama.com

  29. woodhorse

    She went to a high risk clinic because she does so much drugs and wanted the doctor to tell her to have an abortion because hubby doesn’t want her to, but the doctor said “lots of women have done coke to their second month and the babies aren’t deformed” so she couldn’t convince Bratman to go along with an abortion and, to top it all off, she can’t get high tonight. That’s why she’s in a bad mood.

  30. Kamiki

    She actually looks pretty here compared the usual been sprayed orange, spending the night as a hooker look she normally has, Way to go Christina. Shes probably pissed at all those damn paps though!

  31. Ahhh… The Emaciated Human Fly look… When will the fashion world stop giving me so much wood…

  32. Woody

    Shes carrying a starbucks bag if she is indeed pregnant she wouldn’t be going to starbucks, caffeine = bad.

  33. Chauncey Gardner

    You know, with those sunglasses, he looks like Shane McGowan from The Pogues. And that ain’t a good thing.

  34. shanipie

    you go, Christina!
    I have a little one of my own and I fully intend on raising them with Creationist beliefs.

    Come to my site and read all about it!
    http://www.lemonparty.org

  35. WowJustWow

    She’s even cute orange.

  36. captain obvious

    starbucks bag= barf bag for preggo.
    send in the clowns…

  37. star69

    Who cares about Christina Agulilera or whatever her name is….there are much more interesting news stories out right now. Like Paris Hilton, LOLZ!!!

    **goes back to the Parasite Hilton news story forums**

  38. smiley

    I just saw her in concert a couple weeks ago and I noticed she had a small pooch. She is otherwise very skinny but she definitely had a small tummy and I suspected she was preggers.

  39. woodhorse

    32: keep trying to reassure yourself that “just that one time” “nothing happened”

  40. lipton

    Why the hell is everyone calling her a whore? Do you people honestly have any respect for women?

  41. sedimant

    I like chess

  42. SKY

    I FIGURED OUT WHY SHE IS MAD! She’s so upset because she just found out that she can’t wear the 15 tons of makeup while she is pregnant, and that she now has to go au natural…which is going to be scary…

  43. Kris

    Haha I just started playing Stripped, then came on here and this was the news. Neat. Lol. =]

  44. indict

    Paris hilton is such a beautiful, wonderful, worthy person. There is nothing in the universe that is worthy of her. Hope xtina knows that.

  45. indict

    Paris hilton is such a beautiful, wonderful, worthy person. There is nothing in the universe that is worthy of her. Hope xtina knows that.

  46. dudley

    That guy is the ugliest SoB I’ve seen in quite a while. gg chris your kid will look like Gollum from LoTR.

  47. wedgeone

    Any new news? I wanna see sum more hot celebs.

  48. karen

    I bet there is “another man” more attractive than this one Christina.

  49. Anthony

    YOU ALL ARE SO SUPERFICIAL!

  50. zippysweetcheeks

    WOW! he looks like an ailen from the MIB movies

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