Christina Aguilera is a wonder of nature

June 16th, 2006 // 285 Comments

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I’m looking at Christina Aguilera’s legs and I’m pretty sure the way she’s standing is physically impossible. Her left knee looks inverted, which I guess happens sometimes when your weight drops below 32 lbs. She looks like she’s trying to do a cowboy impression but is dressed totally inappropriately for it. Like new age performance art or something. You know the kind. They put on panda suits and then pretend they’re milking a cow. It’s art. You wouldn’t get it.

More of Christina in a see through shirt with really perky breasts after the jump.


  1. krisdylee

    Edna, how’s your cunt flaps doing? I really REALLy fucking missed you. I can feel your beady eyes reading these posts. Hike up that muumuu, get down on your knees and pray for all our salvation. I know I need it. Osh DEFINITELY needs it. Actually, the only thing I need is some hot clit-on-slit action.

  2. Fugurself

    #50, u missed ur calling, u should have been an english teacher in mexico.

  3. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    50 – Hey Feed_Me_Bacon, I didn’t know you were the spelling police. I guess Jacq stole your badge and was impersonating an officer. So arrest us both and we can be lesbo cellmates with matching tattoos.

  4. Cooky

    hey people, She doesn`t know how to walk with does shoes ,she looks so stupid ….

  5. Walnuts

    um..#16, in support of um #8…we don’t do, like or want fucking “FIRST” posts. I especially hate the ones who post first without making any relevant comments…this twat didn’t even read the post first. The creator of site instructed us not to do it a few weeks ago. So…..zuigdrmrop put down your crack pipe and think before you decide to post on this site again fucktard!!

  6. herbiefrog

    #24 hello :)
    i think you might be on
    something there…

    looks like it was a wild ride :)

  7. jane's eyre

    Um, it was a joke, honey. Sorry to get your panties in a bind.

  8. Jeremy1Esq

    Who cares about her legs. With those nice tits and tight body, nothing else matters.

  9. herbiefrog

    #30 hey pete
    …funny how that happens :)

  10. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    57 – My panties are always in a bind because I like it like that.

  11. herbiefrog

    i gTHER
    we r nealt there :)

  12. herbiefrog

    #49 lol babe :)
    i like it when you talk dirrrty

    where am i gonna
    a puerto rican
    of night

    lol lol lol :)))

  13. Vas Deferens

    I would love to titty-fuck her big, lucious, fake, plastic boobies. I really, really would.

  14. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    Is herbiefrog coming on to me? I’m confused. I don’t want to get warts.

  15. krisdylee

    I thought you don’t wear panties, Osh. Remember last night? You told me they get in the way of labia-lovin’.

  16. krisdylee

    just lick him and get high.

  17. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    krisdylee I only told you that so I could tap that ass. Sorry, you gullable little minx. I’ll never lie to you again.

  18. Sheva

    Christina looks really great and those perky fake tits are better than the pancake look she sported in her genie video.

    She obviously having trouble standing because of a permanent open legged position she used so much to accomodate all the brothers she did.

    She liked the brothers cuz they ‘have the flava” and now she has a disjointed posture.

    Keep on banging baby!

  19. Sheva

    And the brothers like to hit smurfs. Gives them that daft feeling of power when they come close to snapping her pelvic bone.

  20. booface

    The “first” shit is annoying, and I’ll tell you exactly how annoying it is by rating the following annoying activities in order of most annoying to least annoying, with the least annoying still being VERY annoying:
    1-HWMNBN or whatever
    2-Herbie Frog*

    *Very close race between first and second place.

    Yes, I know. This post is annoying.

  21. Chicagoboy

    Is that Jennifer Aniston helping X-tina out with her luggage in the first picture?

  22. bigponie


    you are not that genie in the bottle and no I won’t rub you the right way.

    hey I know, why don’t you go and find dorothy and lead her to the yellow brick road you munckin…

  23. brewdick

    is that car enormous or is she a midget in 4 inch heels?

  24. yeah-sweety

    Okay, its a freakin weird pose, but i think she looks good, she needs to get rid off the red lipstick though! and while she’s at it, get rid off her husband, i think he’s even worse than k-fed! look at his ears? i can’t stop staring at them, he has a dumbo thing going on

  25. N. Visible Man Jr.

    65 & 67 Panties are packaging (and sniffing)…half the fun is getting to unwrap the package.

  26. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    68 – fuk you assholl

  27. herbiefrog

    …you’re missing
    …the real news
    …tonight :)))

    …payback is a bitch
    …and then you realise
    …you just became one :)

  28. herbiefrog

    #72 that was almost mu first thought


    …well done babe
    …for beating the

    see it’s safe outside
    as long as noone
    knows who you are :)

    thanks babe :)

  29. limper

    So that guy is her husband, eh? Well I guess his huge ears do provide visual balance for her big fake tits, so they have at least that much going for them as a couple.

  30. sweetcheeks

    If Christina Aguilera is a “wonder of nature,” then Britney Spears is “the shame of nature.”

  31. Iambananas


    Looks like he would kill to be a firecrotch now, instead of a druggie.

  32. Iambananas

    “ain’t no other leg can stand
    up next to you
    ain’t no other leg on the planet does what you do
    You’re the kind of leg a girl wears when she’s a freak
    You’ve got no soul, you’ve got NO class, you’ve got NO style, you have a weird ass
    Ain’t no other leg can do
    Ain’t no other leg but you.”

  33. Iambananas

    She used to be good, now she’s just an over singing skank.

    But she looks okay in this pic. Too sknnny though… kind of eww.

  34. What kinda car is that?! It’s behemoth.

    That thing probably uses little children for fuel.

  35. jems

    Sorry Jacq, the PMS is really getting to me today. I’ll try and play nicer with the newbies.

  36. CherryBomb

    What’s with her wearing a different outfit–but the same shoes–in the last photo? Did she change? Is it from a different day? But more importantly, why do I even care?

  37. andrewthezeppo

    wait, what’s the point of this post?

  38. whackjob

    Seeing as how we’re in STFU-Friday….

    What an amazing place. With all the trolls, coobs, teenage-mutant-herpes-frogs, dame ednas and other generally annoying fucktards this site is truly an exercise on one’s patience. And by one’s I mean mine. So I’ll STFU and continue looking for the funny among the (b)anal.

    OBTW: herbie, at each of your hard returns (uh, the “enter” key you love to use so creatively you fucking dullard) I imagine a sharp object plunging into/heavy object striking onto (your choice) lamebananas skull while Edna, tied in a chair naked, covered in piss is forced to watch.

    This helps me a little. Not much, but a little.

    Other than that, everyone enjoy the weekend; beware the fucktards.

  39. herbiefrog

    …you said

    > > I imagine a …

    and that’s how it works
    lol babe :)

  40. jFp


    I wonder if these people realise how offensive that can be to me…
    that don’t believe in their cult.

  41. @85 – Well, it’s cheaper than gas…

  42. Jacq

    #86 – Forgiven. Trust me, Loritab and Miller Lite works WAAAAAY better than Midol.

    Osh and Jane, you too behave or you mite get stinged by the spelling bee. *bzzzz*
    Me fail English?! That’s unpossible!
    Someone please citizen’s arrest me!! I want to go to lesbian grammar prison and see how many different ways we can spell “do it,” if you know what I mean.

  43. Iambananas

    I don’t like you.

  44. jellybelly166

    ill be the first to state the obvious…wonder of nature, dont you mean freak?!?!
    her legs are the same size as her husbands arm…eat a cheeseburger

  45. Iambananas

    If she were fat youde be all over that. Let it go. She’s the way she is.

  46. Iambananas

    Ain’t no other man, can stand up next to you
    Ain’t no other man on the planet does what you do
    (what you do).
    You’re the kinda guy, a girl finds in a blue moon.
    You got soul, you got class.
    You got style with your bad ass – oh yeah!
    Ain’t no other man its true – alright –
    Ain’t no other man but you.

  47. Gidget Gossip

    I think she looks pretty amazing – Those photos make her look like Gumby though. Hey wait, maybe she has an artificial leg! Yes, that’s it! :)

    She’s fabulous and one of the few celebrities that look great in red lipstick. She has a classic/funky look that’s pretty cool.

    I look homeless half the time when I’m wearing jeans and a t-shirt. :)

  48. I think she looks pretty amazing – Those photos make her look like Gumby though. Hey wait, maybe she has an artificial leg! Yes, that’s it! :)

    She’s fabulous and one of the few celebrities that look great in red lipstick. She has a classic/funky look that’s pretty cool.

    I look homeless half the time when I’m wearing jeans and a t-shirt. :)

  49. jane's eyre

    Title should read, Christina Aguilera is a Freak of Nature.

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