Christina Aguilera is a chameleon

March 23rd, 2007 // 145 Comments

I’m starting to think that Christina Aguilera is color blind. That’s the only explanation for why she’s always three shades more orange than every other person on the planet. It’s like self tanner and orange highlighter are the same shade of gray to her so she just goes with the orange highlighter because it’s always on sale. It’s weird, because she showed up to the Nylon celebration looking fairly decent, and then just a day later she was spotted leaving her hotel in NYC looking like this. This is exactly what a pod person pretending to be Christina Aguilera would look like. Only they’d probably do a better job of match the skin tone of humans.

christina-aguilera-weird-tan-02-thumb.jpg christina-aguilera-weird-tan-03-thumb.jpg christina-aguilera-weird-tan-04-thumb.jpg christina-aguilera-weird-tan-05-thumb.jpg


  1. veggi

    I am sooooooooo hung over.

  2. DrPhowstus

    @95 — I partially agree. But I do feel it prudent to point out than danielle wears KFC flavored lip gloss.

  3. schack

    tee-hee (okay, please don’t eat me) i’ve got as much meat on me as a bird, wait, but not a chicken bird…fuck… my meat’s tough. msg won’t even soften the striated muscle…fuck…um, i swim laps. i taste like chlorine. don’t eat me.

  4. jrzmommy♠

    90–I bet you spent a lot of time in the school nurse’s office as a kid.

  5. Bronskrat T. Polecat


    funny tho

  6. schack

    if we’re gonna start telling the truth in here, i’m going to bed, yo ol’ buzzkill the polecat.

  7. Pelted

    104 I did, it smelled like Newark.

  8. jrzmommy♠

    you must’ve gone to a really shitty school then.

  9. Pelted

    Ah, so I see you know Newark well then.

  10. biatcho

    Pelted – who the fuck doesn’t know Newark? I am not from Joisey but I goddamn know you don’t go to Newark unless you know a crack dealer that’s got your back. and your front.

    You know what else I know – you suck moosecock.

  11. Pelted

    Very good! You’re much better than jrz.

  12. Libraesque

    Biatch, you’re CHEATING on me with that THING?
    I bet you don’t even know when OUR anniversary is.
    I’m heartbroken. I thought we had something……special
    It’s SO over between us

  13. StoneRose

    Both of these dorks have the same noses – drippy, Farrah-Faucet-type jobs.

    If that’s how love is defined, that being the subtle weirdness of one’s shnoz, then someone out there should start a dating service based on similar nose shapes. I’m just sayin.

  14. k naz

    well i guess she is not only colorblind, but sexy blind as well for dating that man. i know looks aren’t everything but she is too hot for that.

  15. biatcho

    You forgot to eat the period after is…

  16. Libraesque

    don’t talk to me I’m SO pissed at you

  17. Libraesque

    #95, I actually did post a hot picture of myself, and that’s when all the fat ugly insecure people started calling ME a fat hairy dyke.
    Here’s the thing, NONE of these people here have ever had actual pictures of themselves on any of their blog sites. Know why? Because then they wouldn’t be able to annonymously be able to call everyone else fat and ugly
    get it?

  18. DrPhowstus

    @117 — Fat hairy dyke.

    Sorry, I don’t have a dog in this fight, just figured it had to be said.

  19. Libraesque

    118-President of the Chode Lickers Society

    had to be said

  20. roflmao

    that really doesnt look like her. her face looks small. wtf

  21. TrimSpaBaby

    #117 Yeah, you were just stupid enough to do that, and of course that makes you so much more perfect and brave and daring and virtuous than all of us, and do you think you might stop mentioning it by July? Due to laws of probablity, not all of us here can be fat and ugy, but regardless of our looks, we’re sure smarter and less needier of approval by a bunch of strangers than you!

    And, sorry, but you are on the chubby side. Deal with it.

  22. tweetyeyes

    And yes, Danielle is a crab infested gutter cunt! Be sure to put that on your name tag when the teachers take you on an outing.

  23. tweetyeyes

    Also Danielle, there is a 30 minute time limit on the library computer. Now go back under your rock slut! Your not funny, your only listening to yourself.

  24. tweetyeyes

    And posting to yourself GC! Noone is listening. I can’t believe you even show your scanky ass here. Move on to another!

  25. HollyJ

    92. Posted by caljenna “…the post at 19 that started this all was pretty damn funny.” (I did too) =X

  26. TrimSpaBaby

    #125 same here – those hearts! There’s something just so psycho about typing “fuck you you fugly skank ?” – it’s like writing a ransom note in crayon. You know she’s logging in on the asylum computer…

  27. danielle

    #126 That’s “skank” with a “♥”.

  28. TrimSpaBaby

    #127 I bet you dot your i’s with hearts, too, you fat fucking whack job.

  29. TrimSpaBaby

    #127 ♥♥♥♥

    Now piss off.

  30. licklick

    Her color reminds me of my piss when I take a megacap of B-complex.

  31. Laura

    I think she looks damn hot. Yah so maybe the tan is not the most flattering color, but shes still sexy as hell. What a body, and so pretty. Id give my left arm to look like her.

    but thats just me.

  32. woodhorse

    Fuck it. If no one else is going to be white, I’m not either. I am now officially Anglo-Saxon and I share 87% DNA with the Basque population of Spain. Which also makes me Hispanic.

  33. Blog Lurker Guy Man Dude

    OOMPA LOOMPAs are real!!! and they aren’t all stumpy little dwarf men in wigs!!!

  34. iamsosmrt


    The day she was blowing things she was at an event, so she had her makeup professionally done, hence looked decent (and less like a trashy stripper).

    The day she was leaving the hotel with hubby she did her won makeup in the bathroom of the hotel suite.

    You see, Christina is rich so she can afford to pay people who are not of the white trash variety do her makeup in a somewhat classier manner. When she does it herself you get to see the three dollar whore she would have been if she never became famous.

    It’s like when you see candid photo’s of

  35. iamsosmrt

    *own makeup

    My stupid spell check isn’t working properly… I need to fire that child.

  36. Saera

    and wtf. is that a guy’s jacket?

  37. herbiefrog

    no matter how rich she is…

    how dare she…
    the “armed forces”
    in “candy man”

    never give up…
    …never surrender

    looked like surrender to us…

    if that is who you are…
    then goodbye.

  38. Nimuë LaMer

    she’s not a chameleon, chameleons change color to MATCH their surroundings.

  39. Lowlands

    Maybe she’s had too much caramelmacchiatos because she starts to look like one.

  40. Lowlands

    The guy is holding her hand with his left hand…In their culture that’s very bad because they’re using their left hand for whiping their ass off.

  41. Lowlands

    Next time when the guy is grabbing Christina’s hand with his left.She should shove the hand and arm of a modeldummy into his.Then walk 3 yards behind him leaving him in the impression he’s holding her hand.

  42. appolloblu

    Btw: “Danielle”; “DanYELL” or what ever your going by today, you should really watch your comments twards pp it may start out as fun but as you know the internet is also a playing ground for some sick individuls, just going back thru comments you’ve left in the past it’s not that difficult to find out just were you reside. Someone could take what you say literal and go 4.20.99 on you, not that I care personally but you sound young and I’d hate to think that this could be my child “just having fun”.

    Try sticking to name calling on the playground, an old fashioned ass kicking might be just what you need to reflect on this.

  43. whitebeeeaaaaar

    airbrushing, plain and simple her face looks airbrushed and all the colours in the pics are oversaturated

  44. biennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn biennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

  45. That is one of the most orange looking self tanners I have seen in my life. She needs to try something with a little bit more bronze!

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