Christina Aguilera deserves a night out, hearts America

June 5th, 2008 // 32 Comments

Christina Aguilera (Above urging you to vote or else Max Liron eats Stars N’ Stripe. Christ, I’ll do it, lady!) defended herself against critics of her nights out to the club. I mean, you try spending 24/7 with Jordan Bratman. Hour after hour of him wearing a wizard hat and playing Oblivion. It would drive Mother Teresa to knock back Jell-O shots. But, of course, Christina paints a different, almost believable picture to Access Hollywood. I KNOW YOUR SECRETS!:

“I spend all day with my son and once in a while if I want to go out and have a mommy-daddy night with my husband, I am more than allowed to do that,” Christina told Access Hollywood.
“They never air [footage] of the paparazzi actually pulling up beside my husband and being like, ‘When is she going to leave the house? I have been trying to get a picture of her for weeks.’”

Dude, she’s lying. The paparazzi talking to Jordan Bratman? Riiiight. I’m pretty sure the paps don’t speak Mole People. I mean, c’mon. Anyone whose mastered the language would be halfway to the Earth’s core by now. Why? For the Mole Gold, genius. Jesus, what do they teach you kids in school these days?


  1. Ted from LA

    That photo is odd. Is her face made of Playdo?

  2. She is a mother and a grown woman, let her party! :D


  3. CookieVanderbilt

    Did Heidi & Spencer stage that photo for Christina??

  4. kimmy4lsu

    WTF is wrong with Oblivion?! I love that fucking game, and I’m a chick!

  5. Just Sayin

    Where’s the story?
    She’s a responsible adult (I’m guessing)

  6. bedot

    jesus christ that kid’s head is huge!

    And anyone else notice Christina is always kinda orange. Weird.

  7. liz4sale

    Shes probably telling the truth. people always make stories out of nothing.

  8. not-even-news

    uhm, it’s called a babysitter…

    man these guys are out of control making stupid stories out of nothing.

  9. ph7

    Those luscious red lips can come party in my pants!

  10. Christina, step away from the drag queen make up counter please. I can’t take it anymore. And lmao @ mole people comment. Now I can’t get that image out of my mind. Of course, it could be worse, she hasn’t gotten out of cars w/o panties (yet) or shaved her head.

  11. Trover

    She needs to step away from the peroxide and nasty joker look. And just put all the focus on her tits. Works for Pammy, even now.

  12. havoc

    Way to disrespect the flag bimbo……


  13. how much more american can you get?

  14. imagen

    No, Christina, you don’t deserve a night out. It is going to take a lifetime of redemption to make up for scheduling someone to rip that innocent, precious child out of your tainted womb 3 weeks early just because you are too posh to push. Newsflash: I have a sneeking suspicion your vagina couldn’t have gotten bigger. SELFISH BITCH.

    Oh..and you have a double chin in that pic. You’re welcome.

  15. I'm all sympathy...

    It must be exhausting for her to watch the nanny take care of the baby…

  16. b

    Someone please tell this dumb clown makedup bitch and her ugly Jew husband that our flag isnt a fucking blanket for your kid to shit on. Bye a blanket bitch.

  17. Samhain

    Wow. And I thought she couldn’t possibly ever put more makeup on that mask of a face. I stand corrected.

    Hey, she’s right – she spends “all day” with her baby. After she finally wakes up at 2:00 pm, she watches the Day Nanny take care of him all day. That is just too exhausting, so she has to go back out and party while the Night Nanny takes over. See? She’s not full of shit!

  18. britney's weave

    wouldn’t it be fun to scrub her face with dawn and an sos pad? just to see what happens.

  19. ball buster

    Can it you clown. I really can’t stand this hag.

  20. Kim Lard-ass-ian

    Is she aiming for a new career as a blow up doll?? For someone with so much money she looks as cheap as cheap can be. Truly FUG.

  21. arnie

    wow, finally a message of peace and love. Look at the nice things jewish kids doing:)

  22. Quinn

    Trying to get a picture of her for weeks??
    There are new pics of her almost daily since she popped.

  23. goddess

    you are hilarious, superfish man

  24. Randal

    I’d fuck her in the ass at best

  25. MasterYota

    Hey, where’s Edna Bambrick when you need her? Hehehe, good times, hilarious it was.

  26. ew

    this is anti-american..she has a rat nose and looks like a clown.

  27. Chupacabra

    She’s got the gun set to “whore.”

    This whore is so enormous tricky and fucking WITCHED that she is using the american flag as some sort of sleeping bag.
    Now they love me also more and I’ll be selling much more music, I’M RICHER!!

  29. Geoff

    If that kid shits on Old Glory I’m going to deport him and his hooker mother.

  30. Zia

    I mean, you try spending 24/7 with Jordan Bratman. Hour after hour of him wearing a wizard hat and playing Oblivion.


  31. missywissy

    She looks like Miss Hanigan from Annie. And she is tacky tacky tacky, and tackiness magnetizes to her! I can”t believe she used the flag for this little photo op (IF THAT’S WHAT YOU CALL IT). I wish she would just go away, be a mom, don’t pimp out your baby. Can you all imagine her singing lullabyes to her kid? Rooooooocck ooooooohhhhhh A Byyybyybybyybyyyyy Baaaaaaaaaabyyyyy Woooooooooh In, In In a TreEEEEEEEEEEE—eeeeeeee—eeeeeeeeeeeeeee Tooooooooooop Oooooooo ohohohoh Wh- eeeeen the wind bl-oooooooooooooooooooooows……….

  32. christina aguilera is such a whore i hope she fucking dies, I wish she would be smothered by her ridiculous breasts

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